The Paragon Path Towards An Epic Destiny

[Sólveig]

Alright, I'm glad I woke up today. That is a weird sentence, but I just went to NaNoWriMo.org to set up this book to make myself extra accountable and because chasing badges is fun. Not only that, but I removed one word from the manuscript because I felt it was better to leave it without that word. Realizing that I'm pretty much going the antinovel route, but that's just because this is a first draft, I'm sitting on my pants, and I have no idea about what I'm doing... until today. When I read what I've done I realized I'm doing something that's been done before: Hotline Miami. The first game, to be exact. The non-linear storytelling got me into adding surrealism into it, and now I finally unlocked the thing.

The plot, screw it, I have no idea about what I'm doing. It'll materialize once I keep moving forward, but one thing is certain: the ending is done.

Because NaNoWriMo works with wordcount, and I have 212 pages for this, I multiplied my average (350) by the number of pages, which leaves me with a wordcount of 74200. I don't think I'll reach that, but I may pass that... I don't know. I will keep my actual wordcount only for BuJo statistics, which will also be here (from time to time, whenever I feel like I'm making progress on something), but not for anything else. The goal is to fill all 212 pages and not follow an arbitrary word count, hence I'll keep track of my progress considering page count rather than word count.

Counting last night, I'm 4 pages out of 212. 1.8% in there.

Addendum: I am writing more. Will update on the log tonight. I just want to add that now that I mentioned Hotline Miami, I am now vibing to writing during the times without [REDACTED] giving me company. I forgot how awesome the soundtrack is for writing, including but not limited to surrealistic scenes. With some Bataille and Lynch on my back, I feel a lot more confident about this project, even though I have no idea about what I'm doing. Then again, that's the thing: I'm 4 pages out of 212. I'm just getting the vibe around here. I am just beginning the journey, and now I am interested to see where does this leads me to.

 

[Sólveig]

The thing about this project is that I'm not just writing it. I'm living it. Even if things are completely fictionalized, real life wrote the plot. I am feeling addicted to it now. This project became my new drug, and here's the thing: I wrote it without [REDACTED] during the day, though she gave me company for the 365 challenge, even if it meant severe distractions. I answered one question, and now I'm writing again. I went up and beyond today, and I skipped working out because writing took quite a toll, but damn, I feel good. Even though I don't know where is this dragging me, I feel really good.

All I have is just a few Lego pieces that I don't know how to fit together. Short stories that don't link to each other somehow, but whether I'll cut them or keep them will be a problem once the 212 pages are done. I know the plot will come through in the future, all I'm doing for now is getting my building blocks to build this thing. It's messy, it's disorganized, it's... horrible... it's quite a good representation on how my life feels. I am passionate, but I'm also in the middle of a neverending chaos that doesn't seem to go away from me. I guess the title makes a whole lot more sense now.

At 2.8% now. That's 6 out of 212 pages. Also, I did entry 65 of the 365 challenge, meaning I have 300 days, or exactly 10 months to go. It felt like I just made progress today. I made progress on something, and now, I am about to write.

Give me two boxes of pens, because I am about to commit an entire genocide of ballpoint pens. I didn't do my Burpees today, at least not beyond 100, but damn, I wrote so much today, and I want to keep this going.

Not a Watch again. Waited for the water to come, and it didn't. Nearly at 0% once again.

February 20th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Alt Arm / Leg Raises +EC
Count: 1757 - 1753 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 577 words in 40 minutes! (65/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
2732 words in 150 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 6/212 Pages (2.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 17%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

(Not a) Watch report: three more pages, and almost a fourth one. I think I know where the story wants me to go to now, even though I feel nothing makes sense. Events are taking me back to last year; more precisely, the limbo that was between the breakup and the elections. Also, my pen died. Didn't I say that I'll be murdering ballpoint pens by making this handwritten?

I thought about restarting before, but now I think I know where this wants me to go. All I needed was some extra pages to write upon.

 

[Laura Rainbow Dragon]

@Laura Rainbow Dragon I want to believe. No, really, I want to believe that what you're saying is true,

I'm not suggesting the reason you have a water crisis in the first place isn't the fault of your government. (I don't know all the facts. But my reading suggests it is.)
I'm just saying, in this particular instance, draining the well most likely wasn't an evil act. It was an act necessary for public safety.
I understand that your water problems are much greater than one instance of flooding of one well.

 

[Sólveig]

I'm not suggesting the reason you have a water crisis in the first place isn't the fault of your government. (I don't know all the facts. But my reading suggests it is.)
I'm just saying, in this particular instance, draining the well most likely wasn't an evil act. It was an act necessary for public safety.
I understand that your water problems are much greater than one instance of flooding of one well.

I mean, I do appreciate the effort on educating me, but I'm just too blinded by the grudge that even things that are necessary seem evil. Even learning the fact makes it worst because it only proves that things are much worse than they seem.

 

[Sólveig]

I haven't done a single Watch this week, and I don't think I'll do one this weekend.

The day was alright. I did work out a lot, but I couldn't write as much as I wanted. My efforts went for the evening in my book, but the biggest thing was a very early powercut that threw everything out the window. I know I could've written during the powercut, but I didn't. I had to do other things instead.

Let's just say that this week hasn't been good. Nevertheless, I got a book going, and the fact that I'm pantsing got me some extra ideas that I wrote in some pieces of paper. This thing will be banned here; that much I know. At least I know I'll be boycotted if I keep going, but I honestly don't care. I'm doing this for me. F*ck structure. F*ck plotting. F*ck everything. This is about my life now, and I need this to make sense to that question I posed in my journal. Let's say my answer is the thesis, and the life I'm both living and writing are the arguments. It is a weird place I wedged myself into. Out of all the people in the world, I thought I'd be the last one to be in a triangle.

I'll write in a bit. I'm just going to get over some admin. [REDACTED] is here, so I can feel safe under her virtual presence. This thing is a journey, but at least I'm knocking it down from the first two cyphers. 11 pages. 201 left.

300 Burpees. I did not tick this as a kickboxing day. It didn't feel like one.

February 21st, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Knee-to-elbows +EC
Count: 1758 - 1754 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
One Kick (Side Kick) - LVL III +EC +Rest between levels
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 12 Lunges | 16 Squats | 16 Squats
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 598 words in 27 minutes! (66/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
2251 words in 116 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 11/212 Pages (5.1%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 17%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

(Not a) Watch report: 14/212; 6.6% progress. My writing got interrupted when I noticed a strange change of mood that came so suddenly and without warning coming from [REDACTED], and it made me switch my priorities. It sounds too male coming from me, and I don't know if this is my male traits bleeding into my female identity, or that I was raised with these values, but I can't stand around an upset woman and not do something about it, especially if it's someone I care for. I don't know what happened on the few minutes in which she left, but when she returned, something was different... and it worries me. I don't know why, but it worries me. No, actually, I know why, but that worry is more likely to be my own anxiety flaring up into the worse conclusions, because why the heck do you think you deserve the most likely option that's pretty much nothing going on? Nah, let's screw your life and go into the misery of the worst of the worst!

The thing that really drove the position that I am is my complete powerlessness about doing something. Like, whenever my ex was upset, I was always for her, which is pretty much how the codependency begun. However, even though my patience got thin at some points, I still couldn't just have her upset and do absolutely nothing about it.

Now I feel pathetic for telling the Internet how my writing session went. It feels like I'm going through a downward spiral, and the funny thing is that I'm writing about this too. Like I said before, I stumbled myself upon a place in which I was the last person I thought to be as the protagonist of such dilemma. I walked into a f*cking love triangle where in one side the girl may not want anything to do with me anymore, and the other side doesn't even know that I exist! This is why I spend three f*cking days wondering why the f*ck did I fall for someone I wasn't supposed to, and it's been like that for three years?!

I know I made my decision, yet for some strange, weird, and really spartan vision, I saw a path that's more perilous, yet it could lead to something more rewarding?

Now you see why I started this book, completely out of the blue, with nothing except the pain of last year, the emotional confusion, and this new adventure that feels like I'm climbing the Everest. Naked. With only my hands for climbing gear.

Let's forget about [REDACTED], because she managed to pick herself back up. I forgot to mention something important about today. I wanted some guidance for this... triangle (I CRRRRRRRINGE whenever I refer to it like that; it makes me feel like I'm in a really bad young adult novel from the late 00s; something worse than the Wattpad teenage fanfics that litter the platform), and there is only one person I know who had this lifestyle: my deceased brother. Of course, "but Sólveig, how are you going to talk to someone who is dead? Are you going to use a ouija board, hire a medium, or something?" No, lovely reader. I don't need any Divination magic; I have the honor to have inherited his journal. So I went there, looking for answers, and saw a strange coincidence. According to one of his entries back when he got cancer, in the middle of his agony, he confessed to have fallen for someone, which is... odd. He lived a nomadic lifestyle; he had friends everywhere he went to, and he also had romantic partners everywhere. He was open about it too. Mom called him a free spirit, because he never committed. He loved to travel, he couldn't stay in one place, and like Anaïs Nin, he couldn't just have one girlfriend. Except at the end of his life.

I don't know anything about that girl he fell for, as he didn't say much. However, he mentioned her name, and this could be a long shot, but I believe he also wrote her phone number because I saw that name, in his journal, with the number. No, I am not going to call that number, I am not trying to solve the mystery. Besides, the coincidence is that the name is the same name that [REDACTED] has. It feels like we both fell for the same girl, but I digress.

What I noticed is that he really touched the hearts of every girl he's ever been with. Is nothing new; he didn't say those exact words, but told me that many of the drawings and the messages he has in his journal are not from him, but actually from his many lovers. While I think I found an answer, the current situation is pretty much telling me to not put all my eggs in one basket.

However, I'm still concerned about her. It may be nothing. Hell, that's the most likely thing... However, it felt... really strange.

Seriously, this has been... a very interesting week. 6/10, would rather have a month worth of boring weeks after this.

 

[Sólveig]

Wrote my book. Check. Drafted a new story. Check. Carried on with the 365 challenge. Check. Did my workout. Check. Had quite some leisure time and some fun. Check. Kept networking with other authors. Check. Was social with my family. Check.

Was this day good? No. Was it a rainy day without powercuts? Yes. Was it cold? Yes!

This day wasn't good. This day was ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!

I WON ONE!

Guess who wrote 2500 words today? Guess who did 300 Burpees today? Guess who drafted a brand new short story today? It was all me! It was all my effort! I did it all, AND I even got some time to journal about this video that I watched during breakfast, and I had to write about it because it resonated with me.

After such a lousy week, I am so glad I ended up with the high ground and tell this week "rest in peace, motherf*cker!" and close this with my three stars turned into gold! One amazing day for my moodboard... Damn, aside from the strange hiccup from earlier, it was all incredible. Tomorrow is D&D, so I'll have a day off, but I have the chance to keep on with my book. Of course I'll carry on with my book... right after doing some admin work. Not too much though; that'll be for tomorrow morning before D&D, which is just planning the next week ahead and getting my statistics to post, and stuff.

I am, genuinely, glad of having a perfect day, and it was all my doing! I did it! I wrote! I had fun! I had everything falling into place!

Roll the celebration music!

February 22nd, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Seconds Side Plank Hold +EC
Count: 1759 - 1755 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
WoD: North Star - LVL III +EC +Rest between levels +ATATATATATATATATAT
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 531 words in 28 minutes! (67/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
2650 words in 152 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 14/212 Pages (6.6%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 17%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

(Not a) Watch report: 18/212; 8.5% progress. I got hoodwinked. I thought I'd write for less time, but I ended up adding 66 minutes to it, and made more progress. [REDACTED] seems to be fine, so it was all anxiety on that manner. I'm nearly 10% through, and I managed to add one of the many ideas that I've got. I still don't know how everything adds up to anything, but I know this is going somewhere. I mean, this is f*cking fun, I won't lie. Don't know where is this leading me towards to, but I'm in for the long game. I guess things are making more sense now. I also started bulldozing boundaries.

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 10861 words
• Burpees: 6 days, 1230 Burpees
• 3 days of reading

---

There wasn't much difference with the Burpees, but having one project to focus on is doing wonders for my wordcount. I can see a spike going up, and I'm into this book, even if it is a mess right now, but I'll figure it out. Just today I realized that a couple of characters could pay off later on. Took me until now to do admin, but then again, Sunday, so it's an off day.

 

[Sólveig]

Chill day with D&D and whatnot. I don't think I'll write tonight, and if I do, it might just be a single page, or a partial scene, or something... I don't know.

All I know is that the word count is going up again, and it feels like the times of NaNoWriMo all over, but with everything handwritten instead. My mood dropped a bit today however. While I had fun with D&D hating my own character for being so unhinged, and all of us roasting the sh*t out of her, I wasn't really in a good mood tonight? I mean, I still am not. It showed in the challenge in the fact that it drifted so much from the theme that I barely touched upon it. I still stuck to the rules, but it really drifted from it.

I still need to plan my week though. I'll move a lot of things for tomorrow, that's for sure. I feel like I should just... end the day right now.

Water came only for a bit. Our supplies are almost out. We couldn't fill everything.

February 23rd, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Seconds Side Plank Hold +EC
Count: 1760 - 1756 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
52 Side Kicks for @Fremen 's birthday
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 513 words in 27 minutes! (68/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1890 words in 93 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 18/212 Pages (8.5%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 17%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Man, yesterday struck with a powercut that lasted for the entire afternoon. I could've written. Of course I could've written, but I really was dead. I did some work at the library, I'm tired of not doing Watches proper, so I just slept for a bit. I did spend some time journaling, but that was it. It was a long day, and while it was a good day, it didn't precisely end well.

On one hand, the water finally came, YAY! On the other hand, that meant cutting sleep... when I had to wake up early today.

I didn't post. I didn't write much. At least I got 110 Burpees, but that was it. The day just dissolved in my hands.

This morning I also figured out why was I so moody lately: February 9th marked the first time, in six years, I didn't ask my ex to be my Valentine's. I put that day in a pin because that was the day when I asked it for the first time. I replaced it, sure, but it felt like another grief period. Thing is I'm also very afraid of the future. New doors are opening, and I... didn't expect for them to open so soon.

E: Forgot to add the die rolls.

February 24th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Jumping Lunges +EC
Count: 1761 - 1757 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
7 Full Burpees
Monday +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Lunges | 8 Squats
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 537 words in 28 minutes! (69/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
911 words in 46 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 20/212 Pages (9.4%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 25%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

As I was saying, doors are opening up. I had therapy today, and that revealed two things about me, one of them brought an entire explanaition about why I can't tolerate being in the presence of a woman who is upset without doing something about it. The other one was something that my previous therapist missed, and now I have the chance to go back into one of my favorite novels that has exactly the lessons that I need: The Knight in Rusty Armor. There's going to be a lot of journaling from now on. That trait that I have is not something that I hate, but leaving that uncontrolled... well, that's how the codependency started. It's about moderating it, because I end up doing more harm than good.

Encouraged by him, I decided to go to [REDACTED] and then... well, I could say I chickened out, but knocking on a door is not the same as entering, or in this case, it was more about exploring a castle before entering. I know what happened to me last weekend made me stand out on my own, which also means... in a very Jungian way, that the universe is leading me towards something. Starting my project out of the blue might also point that out, but that's a whole different beast. [REDACTED] right now is too soon, but at least I'm finding ways towards my goals.

I have some plans for tomorrow. I need to regroup for a moment, put things into paper, and put them in the wall to keep them visible. While yes, the CMOS battery down is provoking some resistance, it feels more like a minor annoyance than actual friction.

No workouts, as I slept very late, and woke up too early. I did have some sleep earlier today, but that's it.

February 25th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 High Crunches +EC
Count: 1762 - 1758 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 544 words in 26 minutes! (70/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1742 words in 79 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 23/212 Pages (10.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 25%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Not a Watch. I did get into some writing, but really late. Had to do some errands, and did some homework I got from therapy yesterday, but it was just more like the beginning of it. I actually decided to read The Knight in Rusty Armor once again with the new insight I've gotten and... it's the first time ever that book makes me cry, even though it was just a tiny bit, it did made me cry...

I did some stuff I put on a to-do list today... partially. To be honest, I couldn't do anything due to a powercut that started too early, and I wasn't counting on it. Thankfully I have a copy of the book I just read, so all I did was to grab it and read it.

I thought about writing tonight, but what happened to the cold nights?! I am sweating. Hot nights are in... again...

400 Burpees. Second time in the year I do 400 Burpees.

February 26th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Lunge Step-ups +EC
Count: 1763 - 1759 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
8 Full Burpees
Phoenix - LVL III +EC +Rest between levels +Full Burpees
Super Torch +EC +Full Burpees
Shredder HIIT - LVL SS +No rest
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Lunges | 12 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 624 words in 30 minutes! (71/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1249 words in 58 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 25/212 Pages (11.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

I will be deep diving into my narcissistic abuse story with one of my worst forms of abuse. I will put it into spoilers with this trigger warning. If you don't feel comfortable, just skip this post and go into the check marks because I didn't do much today, but I did write a lot.

Spoiler

What a horrible day. The heat forced me to sleep naked, and I had a severely harsh awakening right before my alarm went off. How bad was it? The worst type of bad. It brought flashbacks to 20 years ago. Remember when I said I'm a victim of narcissistic abuse? There's actually something darker that I don't want to admit in public, but it is something that my narcissistic abuser did to me when I was 11. It happened again this morning, though under different conditions, it was almost the same, even to the insulting conversation that came afterwards. Do you have any idea how f*cked up is to be judged by the color of your skin by someone who shares your very same blood? Just because I'm tanned, and she is pale, I got told I was born in the dirt, and all these things, and people say "oh, it's the Alzheimer's, and stuff," no, you don't get it: narcissism gets amplified with Alzheimer's, and it showed this morning. Twenty years ago I got judged by my body, now I got judged by the color of my skin... by someone who is my blood... in a family where everyone has a different skin color, like, I don't know, the majority of Venezuelan families as we are all so damned mixed that race isn't an issue to us?

Again, the humiliation didn't happen because of her racism. It was because it triggered memories from 20 years ago. Painful memories. Memories that partially explain my ways now, but I can't tell what it is, at least I'm not ready to share that. Not even my ex knows that part of my life. So, instead of writing the entire day, following the plan that I had in my head, through hourly things, working out my Burpees, and stuff, I did absolutely nothing, but stay in bed, sobbing and wishing to be dead before I picked up my journal and write from 8 AM (after an hour of sobbing), and didn't stop writing until it was 2 PM. Six hours, writing everything, doing shadow journaling, doing my homework from therapy... I did not feel good today. I did not feel safe either. Once again, back to my teenage years, where even my room didn't make me feel safe.

Then, I carried on with my book. I wrote five pages in two hours... while I talked to my ex.

It sounds like I fell into the temptation, but no, I didn't. I just needed someone to talk to, at least to distract me from this morning, and she was the only one available. I didn't fell for her. Even though my heart aches for her, even though I want to go back to her, I didn't even touch on that subject. I know that's an open door. I know I can go through, but life is inviting me to explore more, to consider other options... maybe even one that is incredibly unorthodox, one that I never saw myself picking, but it's the one my brother would've encouraged me to pick without any drama.

Had not been because of this book, I would've lost myself today. I did not work out. I got so hurt by this morning that it felt like nothing even mattered. Do you have any idea what it's like to be covered in just a blanket, screaming at the top of your lungs for someone to stop staring at you while they had the curtain hold up to the side, making an entire mess of your desk? Seriously, every single day I wish for her to be dead, and I feel no remorse. I don't even care if life will bite back at me, it is for these things, and all the damage she has done to me. Damn, I'm even being fair by just wishing death rather than suffering, because there's no point in suffering. Then I'm the coward in a situation in which I was powerless, because that's what she called me too: a coward who doesn't want to show her face. While it is true that I covered myself with a blanket to prevent mosquitos biting me while I slept (dengue fever is a serious thing; I don't want to go through that a third time as it nearly turned into the hemorrhagic the first time I had it, my platelet count went dangerously close to zero and I had to get a blood test every single day while also being confined into bed, doing nothing for months), I was still butt naked, and she was staring at me while I screamed for her to stop. I thought she wouldn't be able to hurt me anymore, but as it turns out, she is more than able to do so.

Could it be worse? It could have if I didn't lock my door, because she tried to get in twice. That was the sound that woke me up before she moved the curtains and stared at me for a whole minute before I mustered the courage to close the curtains without revealing myself, turning my desk into an even messier thing.

At least I wrote my book. As for tonight, it's really late now to even write. This is hell. It has to be hell. Caretaking my abuser is hell.

February 27th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Get-ups +EC
Count: 1764 - 1760 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Full Burpees
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 506 words in 24 minutes! (72/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
2130 words in 124 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 30/212 Pages (14.1%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Mamatigerj]

I am so sorry, @Sólveig.

 

[Syrius]

I am sorry that you are going through this.

 

[Sólveig]

Something new developed. That's all I can say. The triangle just became more complicated, and not only another thing from my past came back to bite me, but also my unconscious has been bleeding into my reality... more often than I thought. I won't complain about it because it's stupid to complain. To quote Chandler: "Oh no! Two women love me! They're both gorgeous and sexy! My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight!"

Yeah, that's the quote I summed up my journaling efforts on today, but it did bring something up. An... extremely transgressive idea that's been running in my head for a while, with this new insight, turned into a bit of social commentary judging how I'm starting to fall out of societal patterns. I noticed this back when I was with my ex, but now it feels even funnier. I haven't written that because it's just too extreme for me to even start writing. However, being raw is something that I'm good at. Again, I can't stand censoring myself. In today's session for my book, well... I went on rants that would not just ruffle some feathers, I actually called someone out. I didn't mention any names, but I was really close to put a full name on it. It even turned into a mockery about the status quo. This thing is going to get me in serious trouble. I already enlisted the potential crimes, from lewd conduct and manufacturing and distribution of pornography to terrorism and even treason to the homeland... all because of an erotica. I mention treason because they really love to charge anyone who rebels with that.

Well, I shouldn't have taken drawing political caricatures back in the early to mid 10s with who could be considered as the most extreme and rebellious of political caricaturists in the city. His lesson still sticks with me to this day: Art has no banner, and if it has a banner, it should be a banner of rebellion and never support any causes. By its nature, art is always against the system, whether you agree or disagree to it. This is why I find incredibly unethical for caricaturists to draw caricatures that show the people in power in good light. I mean, I already find unethical for anyone who calls themselves an artist and puts out a piece of art that defends a power figure.

I don't have a bullseye, yet I nearly got one last year. Even though I'm worried about where does this manuscript leads me, especially as it goes on little rants like that one, I can't stop feeling so much pride on my words. It really does feel like I've finally had enough hits, and I'm punching back. It truly feels like I'm turning the tables. It feels like I lean towards journalism more than fiction. Still, there's a certain anger and reset in my manuscript. It's all that anger that's been boiling inside me over the last 25 years, ever since this dictatorship begun. It's all spilling out, and today I feel... relieved. I feel grateful for writing it. It's way too far to be over, but it feels good to write this, even if my hand hurts from holding the pen for so long.

I skipped workout today. I did 100 Burpees, and that's it. I don't know, I woke up with my left knee acting up, and then the joint between my torso and my thigh acted up too. Part of it is all the emotions from yesterday, the shadow journaling, and all of that fire looking for an outlet beyond my writing. Then again, can you blame me? After the rough year that 2024 was, I deserve a rest, but I can't have a break, so I have to fight back, even if it breaks me. There's no other way but forward.

February 28th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Seconds Elbow Plank Hold +EC
Count: 1765 - 1761 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 16 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 560 words in 32 minutes! (73/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1713 words in 89 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 34/212 Pages (16.1%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Laura Rainbow Dragon]

to you @Sólveig. I am wishing for you strength to keep forging ahead. You are doing great in the face of some legitimately very tough circumstances!

 

[Sólveig]

This damned book is turning even more radioactive with each session, so much so that I think I made Tropic of Cancer look like a children's book. We're only 36 pages in!

There was supposed to be a meeting today at the non-profit, so a day got wasted because it was cancelled, and I didn't know. Moved for tomorrow, but as they know, I am busy on Sundays no matter whether there's D&D or not. There is D&D tomorrow, and I'll be mastering. I'll prepare my session tomorrow in ten minutes.

Still the afternoon wasn't wasted, but I wish I could've done more. This week was really low when it comes to workouts, but hey, I'm close to 20% of the book! 36 pages handwritten in, what, 10 days? I think I'm doing good, and I like doing it. It's freeing me a lot.

I honestly don't know what else to say. Today's entry for my challenge was the most transgressive so far too, and also the most atmospheric. I really didn't expect to make an argument that felt like it was taken straight out of Restif de la Bretonne's playbook in a challenge. I just want to finish my short story and write some more. Handwriting feels like a chore, but I do have a lot of paper. Handwriting first drafts feels good, even if it is time consuming. I think I'm also gaining more resistance on my wrist.

Only 50 Burpees today, so I do expect a drop in my numbers. Quite a lot of walking.

March 1st, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Jumping Jacks +EC
Count: 1766 - 1762 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
WoD: Last Life - LVL III +Megaset
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 1 - 100 | 40 | 40 Push-ups
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 531 words in 30 minutes! (74/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1196 words in 68 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 36/212 Pages (17.0%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

(Not a) Watch report: It's been a while since the last time I wrote at midnight, and I started to miss [REDACTED]. However, while it is true that I'm not truly on the clear as to what the hell am I doing with this manuscript, I really can't stop thinking about the moment [REDACTED] entered into my life, and start writing about it since it is significant. Seeing both of them online, especially after rekindling my friendship with my ex, feels uncanny, because now I know what my position is regarding this ridiculous triangle I found myself into. First time [REDACTED] feels distracting because she demands to be written about. That's the thing about muses for me: they write themselves. I did not expect to use a lot of symbolism and surrealism in my work, until I realized how much the fire is meaningful into my process. I'm not sure if I said this before, but do you know there's one meditation technique that is all about imagining the room is getting filled with water? I use the opposite of it. Instead, I always imagine myself as I caught on fire, just like Quang Dúc back when he protested the persecution of Buddhists. It felt more fitting. I mean, the actual title is related to fire anyway. A freaking hell is what my pen is unleashing.

I... planned. Not exactly. I just wrote the things that I want to write next before [REDACTED] finally shows up in the book. I'm delving into a metaphorical dungeon now, and I'm seriously afraid of what will come out of it. I did not plan for this, but then again, maybe this is what I need. Stuff is happening around me. Rekindling my friendship with my ex is a trial, that much I know; writing this book is a form of facing the abyss as I'm, quite literally, facing my own shadow, even if this isn't shadow work. This is more painful to write than I originally thought, but when I stop writing and I don't feel pain is when I know that I made one step further. Tonight might have not been that type of session, but once I reach some points that are critical I know I'll have that feeling of closing a thread once and for all.

My only gripe is that [REDACTED] looks freaking gorgeous tonight, and that always divides me in the sense of the position that I found myself into because I realized I can't choose one over the other as I originally thought. Heart, you are an idiot. You have good taste, you've always had good taste in partners, but you also are an idiot... forcing me to do bolder things at the risk of getting even more hurt than the previous time... ADHD too.

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 10831 words
• Burpees: 5 days, 680 Burpees
• 3 days of reading

---

Bad week. I guess it was a bad week. Not really my best week, but also not my worst. I've been struggling with distractions too, and now I'm about to go under a period of overwhelm.

 

[Sólveig]

D&D day. It was alright, but the amazing thing happened was after the session. Suddenly we started talking about browsers, and one of the players talked about an addon that is going to work wonders with my ADHD: Unhook. It removes almost every feature that Youtube does to keep you hooked: recommendations, trendings, shorts, comments... even video descriptions are gone. It's completely customizable so you can remove the things that you want to remove, and it's quick. As soon as I saw it work, I immediately said that this is going to work for my ADHD, and I feel it's working so far. It adds a piece of friction so that now, if I go on Youtube, I'll watch the content that I want to watch, and once I'm done with it, I won't be pulled into the content hole. It's been hours, and my experience is improving. It's actually helping me to focus on my writing alone, even when I'm not body doubling.

Again, Sundays are off, but I did roll the dice to see what do I get. I wanted to do Burpees, but I honestly couldn't be bothered... until the dice told me to do Burpees. I guess why not. Ten is good.

The meeting at the non-profit that I didn't go to put me into a bit of an overwhelming position now. That's why said I'm about to go under a period of overwhelm, because just this week stacked up. With my book, my writing, and everything getting picked up, I'm also having more stuff on my plate to deal with. I couldn't say no to it, as I wasn't there. They know I can't do Sundays, even if D&D gets cancelled, I always have Sundays off. I got used to the idea of having a day off, even if I still use that day to write. I may have to sacrifice a few sessions, but right now it is just temporary. I just need to deal with it tomorrow, to find a way to deal with this incoming overwhelm before everything stacks up. Thankfully, I know a way.

March 2nd, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Side Leg Swings +EC
Count: 1767 - 1763 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
2 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 8 Lunges | 8 Full Burpees
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 2
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 513 words in 28 minutes! (75/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1417 words in 78 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 39/212 Pages (18.4%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

It was alright. No powercut, a bit unproductive, but at least got my things planned out, and I opened the loop for shadow journaling next time. I'll see if I can do it an hour daily, until my next appointment... next month.

Not many things I did today, but at least I didn't get caught on the content hole. Still, it felt like there were too many obligations, and decision paralysis took over, plus either the quantum is beating, or the algorithm is making fun of me, because right before I did my shadow work, I ended up listening to a mix, and a DJ stole my outfit. Yes, I took that personal. How dare you, person I don't know?

Jokes aside, it got me questioning what the hell is going on. Things are... turning weird. First I visualized something that felt canon, then I started to make decisions that were not in my original plan, yet they feel like they put me closer to my vision, then I started a book completely out of the blue, my ex is improving, I'm improving, we're becoming better friends...

I don't know... I mean, I don't have doubts, I'm actually doing stuff, I feel like I'm in good company with both women in spite of the very... strange position all of my life has put me into. I feel like I should text my therapist because today is one of those weird days where I have no idea where my north is, but for some reason I feel like I'm on the right track.

Is not about the book. I mean, the book is part of my journey, yes, but it's only a part of it. I think it's both the shadow work and the fact that I'm accepting it that... well, it happened. The thing that I never, ever thought it would happen to me, happened. Seriously, I know my history, I know my failures, but walking into a freaking love triangle was not on my bingo card. And I guess I'm accepting it now.

When I write about that, it feels like I'm beating a dead horse, and it does sound ridiculous too: oh no, help me, I've fallen in love with two beautiful women! Like, why am I complaining? It does feel like my brother is telling me "just shut up and DATE BOTH, YOU DRAMA QUEEN! DATE BOTH!" even when one doesn't know me, and the other one doesn't want to come back until we're closer. As for when will that happen, hell if I know!

Truth is that this could be a powerful, and also, a poisonous motivator. These type of feelings are a catalyst; that much I learn. They can build just as much as they can destroy, so it's more about the manner in which I channel them and use them. So, I care about two women in my life, enough that I turn to both of them for motivation when I can't get the car started. I mean, I am my own key to get me going, but if I don't have my keys, I can always hotwire the car. I mean, I did it out of fear and anger last year.

Yes, I'm picking up the "do it for yourself," "don't rely on others," "you don't need other people's validation," blah, blah, blah... dear Gods, sometimes, myself is not enough. Then again, I'm writing this book for myself, because I want to give myself hope, I want to canonize that, whatever I'm hoping for in the future for this, not only is it possible, but it's right there for the taking. The novel is not just a piece of fiction; it's a piece of my journal, it's a piece of my life as I live through it, it's a roundhouse kick in the nose to the ones who sit in the throne, it's a knee strike on the gonads of society, it's a lighter that starts a fire in Jesus' beard... It's a middle finger to everything, to finally say that enough is enough, and I want to live the way I want to. If that means more than one partner, so be it. If that means writing books out of the blue because my emotions became too overwhelming, so be it.

It feels like I finally found my muse again, or rather I connected to it. After the year I've had (here we go again!), I deserve some light... even if it is through a leap of faith where I'll most likely end up smashing my face on the hard ground and dying in the process. Then again, there's no victory without bravery, I'm no stranger to leaps of faith, and it's better to die falling than live without taking the plunge at all.

It might be the worst time to do so this week, but I believe I'm ready to take another step further. F*ck, just thinking about it makes me nervous. This whole thing is making me nervous. This is so new...

March 3rd, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Single Leg Bridges +EC
Count: 1768 - 1764 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
7 Full Burpees
20 Full Burpees
Monday +EC
One Kick (Side Kick) - LVL III +No rest
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 16 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 3 | 80 - 52 - 50
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 571 words in 28 minutes! (76/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1204 words in 54 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 41/212 Pages (19.4%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Okay, I'm not putting this in spoilers because it isn't bad, but if you don't want to read me beating the same horse over and over again, I suggest you keep scrolling until you find bold text, or the first check mark.

Well, I couldn't do anything but one item on my list. Shadow work took over. The thing is that one problem lead to another, and another, and another... it was a snowball that didn't stop me from leaving a loop open not because I needed to close the loop, but because the answer was right there. I solved one problem, then got into another. I solved that problem, and then another problem came up... and it's the whole ordeal; every single time I go into that dungeon, I always find a new room, or a new corridor that either leads me to some cool loot, or a monster. Today was three monsters, and a piece of legendary loot that's difficult to get. All in six pages, and I'm only one page left to deplete one sixth of this particular volume. It's fine though, I still have another notebook, and these take me an entire year to fill. I've been journaling for nearly ten years now; I know my own handwriting.

The triangle is still bothering me though. Mostly because I'm pretty much frozen in place. There is nothing I can do right now except focus on myself, and so far I've been... dragging myself up and I'm nowhere up the place I'm supposed to be. I want to punish myself from it, I want to rush, but here's the kicker: this happened because I got too ambitious, okay? This also happened because the year begun with me realizing that I've had feelings for someone else than my ex... since three, four, I don't even know how long ago, and it's giving me a new chance. Heck, it's giving me a shot at something that I never expected my life to go into.

Now, with the shadow work that I'm doing, my novel that I did not carry on with today, by the way, that's something I'll mention in a bit... I'm seeing new opportunities showing up. Way too many, actually... so many that it is overwhelming. So many that I have no idea where to start, or I'm actually not ready to take them all.

I did not carry on with my book today. It's carnivals; it's been carnivals since yesterday. I got invited to a dinner, but the plans got cancelled at the last minute, and that pissed me off. Again, shadow work took over, then the 365 challenge froze me in place, like, it's the first time, in 77 days that I stared at a blank page and did nothing. The whole triangle is gnawing at me every single time I wake up, and then I go to bed... it doesn't help that I'm talking again with my ex while [REDACTED] keeps me company as I write, it feels like I don't know what I want, yet I know exactly what I want, but I can't get what I want as of now, so I try to enjoy the present, but it is painful to always wake up and not have either of them. It's worse than the morning after the breakup, because now the feelings doubled. Literally. There's two women in my life now, and the more I repeat that, the more it feels like a rom-com memoir that @Laura Rainbow Dragon would hesitate on whether it would be in the romance shelf, or the non-fiction shelf.

Yes, I'm making meta jokes with the other logs because irony and sarcasm is my only way to cope when I'm overwhelmed with love. Sue me!

Oh Goddess, that was the corniest line I've written in DAREBEE so far... says the girl whose favorite holiday is Valentine's Day.

The 365 challenge today had to be a love triangle because it was on my head. At this point, I should rename this log "Terrible Writing Advice" due to the amount of times I mentioned those two words.

Ugh, I don't want to write my book, but it feels like I should... If only I was a vampire so that I could eat something so that I could vomit it. I mean it; barfing feels like the right thing to do right now.

Apologies for my drama about drowning myself in a half-empty glass of water. This is how shadow work is feeling like currently.

March 4th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 10+ (20) Push-up Shoulder Tap +EC
Count: 1769 - 1765 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 16 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 4
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 543 words in 26 minutes! (77/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
543 words in 26 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 41/212 Pages (19.4%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 40%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Another day without writing my book. My mind was exhausted at the end of the day. Now I read, got prepared for a few things, and even pushed myself further working out, but my mind was so exhausted I just couldn't do anything. Even the 365 challenge was a bit hard.

So I took a break to distract myself. Now, I'm better. Woke up a bit tired from yesterday, but I'm ready. Right now I'm about to do the admin from last night, the admin from now, and I'll start writing, likely. I have the pad ready for the next 365 entry right beneath my BuJo, I have my journal nearby, and I have my book for the novel close too. I'm actually going to plan out a few ideas that are simmering in my brain and finish some work that I've started. It's going to be a busy day, but as long as I put timers everywhere, I'm fine.

Triangle remains the same, but today I woke up and managed to put it on hold. Finally, I can do something.

March 5th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Toe Tap Hops +EC
Count: 1770 - 1766 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
WoD: Epic Calves +EC
Starfire - LVL III +No rest
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Lunges | 16 Sit-ups - Rolled twice by accident. ADHD.
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 4
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 554 words in 36 minutes! (78/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
554 words in 36 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 41/212 Pages (19.4%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 55%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Over 30ºC (86ªF for those who like their measurements in 50 stars), 40% humidity, and no drinkable water during the day... Yeah, I said that I was going to work? Let's just say that I didn't plan for a heatstroke, and most certainly I didn't find the will to write with wiping my brow every 90 seconds or so. I got the 365 done, but that was just like a minute ago. The water came too, which at least is cool. Honestly, I need more cool things. Literally. I'm still sweating after a shower. Mom showered three times today; last time I remember her doing that here was twenty years ago, when we first moved in, and that's because I also took more than one shower in a day back then, until I got used to the high temperatures.

At least I made up for Chest & Arms, but that was it. Man, my performance has been going downhill over the past days. Partially this is due to me stumbling upon a roadblock in my novel, and is not that I don't know how to overcome; I know exactly what to write, but... I'm a bit afraid of it. Is not a big deal, it's just that... I don't know. I guess I just want some company, or for that... Look, this next scene is a real thing (at least as far as I can remember), but I guess what I long for is for it to be... actually something that feels more hopeful?

I don't know. Having this keyboard on my lap is annoying not because I have to have it in my lap, but because I start to sweat beneath it because of this stupid heat!

E: Wrong date.

March 6th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Side Elbow Plank Rotations +EC
Count: 1771 - 1767 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 4 (120 - 50 - 45) | Day 5
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 501 words in 26 minutes! (79/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
501 words in 26 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 41/212 Pages (19.4%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 55%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Back with the drama, now I woke up wanting to cuddle both simultaneously. It makes me feel like a teenager all over again. Still, I wrote last night, at midnight. I don't know what the hell was I doing, but then again, I'm putting backstory so that everything makes sense. I guess I didn't need to reboot, but actually put the backstory in it, and just keep going with scenes and scenes that have no order, make no sense whatsoever, and I just...

Yeah, it's a shitty first draft that I'm YOLOing like the first time I did NaNoWriMo, only that this time it makes more sense. I'll figure things out once the story is actually over, or have all the 212 pages filled up.

Now I didn't write during the day. Five hours without power, but they were taken advantage of. I finished The 12 Week Year, and just hang out with mom at the local bakery. I thought I'd write on my phone, but I just hung out with her and helped her with her studies. The bakery's community manager was there, and he gave her a free cupcake if she wanted to be on a video for International Women's Day. Mom never says no to a camera, and the cupcake was actually cute. Ever since they changed owners, that bakery has felt much better.

So it was mostly chilling, though "chilling" is not the right word considering the heat. It was better than yesterday though, and I finally paid my debts from yesterday. The 365 for today felt like the seed for something bigger... I might end up doing a novella out of it, or a series... I don't know. I'm putting Entry 80 as one of the possibles because I liked the chemistry between the characters.

With The 12 Week Year cleared up, now I have a better way to read that type of non-fiction, plus I feel more motivated to clear up the books that I'm reading. I may need to drop out a couple of them; Lost Light among them since I want to read the Bosch series from the beginning again. Tomorrow I'll start applying a few lessons and build my plans up again, because I think I need to do some stuff from the very beginning. I need to clear my things.

March 7th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Toe Taps +EC
Count: 1772 - 1768 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Welcome to the Jungle +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 7 | 110 - 60 - 50
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 542 words in 27 minutes! (80/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1540 words in 77 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 44/212 Pages (20.7%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 100%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

A quick warning: I put something in spoiler that it's about suicide. Just as a heads up before revealing it.

Just one word is always enough to make me self-conscious, and sometimes even forget my ADHD, and start entering the cycles of guilt. One word, and a jealousy of a life that [REDACTED] has and what could've been if I was born the right way (don't give me the spiel that I should be okay with my body; I've heard it before, and I'll say it: sometimes I need to feel the dysphoria just to remember that it is normal to be uncomfortable in your own skin when your skin doesn't reflect who you are on the inside), or if I wasn't just forced into making a choice that I'd end up regretting later... or if I wasn't forced into doing anything, really. Every single time it was always jumping off planes without me having enough time to process what the hell was going on. No one has their lives figured out, especially no one who was born in the 90s in Venezuela, and only had barely six years of freedom before the entire country jumped backwards in history, and now we're living the cycles of dictatorship that plagued its history since the Great Colombia broke up.

One f*cking word, and that ruined my day. It broke me. It destroyed me in the middle of workout. I was on set 5, and I just couldn't keep going. I couldn't.

At least I noticed that my performance dropped since last year because I moved rooms. Before, I was in a room where I didn't get direct sunlight. Now, the afternoons turn my bedroom into a freaking oven, and it hasn't changed. In fact, the sun has only turned more intense.

I'm going to try this week to find a place to write outside during the powercuts. Somewhere that isn't the local bakery, or the community center. Even though there's nature at the community center, there's some friction in order to be with nature. I want to see if I can find a park that isn't the one that's way far from home; a park that's closer and has tables and benches rather than just the benches. All I need is my notebook, and my pens.

It feels stupid to post this with [REDACTED]. She shouldn't be here tonight. I'm not really in the mood for writing my novel, at least not tonight. Maybe I'll write a pair of pages before D&D tomorrow morning, and carry on once I'm back, but... tonight? I'm not feeling it. Even with one of my two muses here, I'm not feeling it.

My ex wants to read a fragment of it too. I can only send her the first page, and that alone has a suicide plan I had last year, at a point post-elections that I was so overwhelmed by the paranoia that all I wanted is a way out of them; a way that the "law" would never get to me just for having bad luck. I'm not sure if I want her to read this now because... she doesn't know I'm still in love with her, but someone else stole 50% of my heart from her while we were together years ago. Weird to write this when [REDACTED], the other piece of the triangle, is around.

I don't think things are going downhill. This is just a hiccup. I got hit in the face, which was not cool. Nevertheless, I did some things: I cleared up the number of books that I'm reading, I actually drew the clock for the Hero's Journey in an A5 piece of paper, and I want to draw it again to make it prettier, I organized my material for writing because my novel has a story that forks into its own story as a novella... I even did my D&D session, with just some small admin left to do tomorrow, which is just cleaning up my notes and putting a stat block on paper so I don't have to swap between apps.

I don't know... I just feel unlucky tonight. Very, very unlucky.

March 8th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Seconds Sahaja Navasana +EC
Count: 1773 - 1769 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
WoD: Furyborn - LVL II +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 8
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 565 words in 47 minutes! (81/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1474 words in 97 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Laura Rainbow Dragon]

At least I noticed that my performance dropped since last year because I moved rooms. Before, I was in a room where I didn't get direct sunlight. Now, the afternoons turn my bedroom into a freaking oven, and it hasn't changed. In fact, the sun has only turned more intense.

Are you able to put something reflective in your window?

I had a south-facing room when I lived in the Booming Metropolis. When I first moved out there, a giant maple tree shielded my windows from direct sunlight. Unfortunately, it was removed due to disease. And wow did my room ever get hotter as a result. I taped mylar safety blankets on the inside of all of my windows. And it made a huge difference. I don't know how easy they are to get where you live, given that freezing to death is rather less of a risk in your climate versus in mine. But anything you have access to that is similar would help.

 

[Sólveig]

Are you able to put something reflective in your window?

I had a south-facing room when I lived in the Booming Metropolis. When I first moved out there, a giant maple tree shielded my windows from direct sunlight. Unfortunately, it was removed due to disease. And wow did my room ever get hotter as a result. I taped mylar safety blankets on the inside of all of my windows. And it made a huge difference. I don't know how easy they are to get where you live, given that freezing to death is rather less of a risk in your climate versus in mine. But anything you have access to that is similar would help.

I might need to see if I can get some curtains that work like that. I really can't cover this window with something really solid, or else the Wi-Fi signal gets more fuzzy than it already is. I don't even want to know if carbon dioxide levels change as well.

When I do laundry I do try to put blankets right on the place that goes straight into my room though. Two things happen: they dry faster, and my room cools during the afternoon.

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 7233 words
• Burpees: 7 days, 1170 Burpees
• 2 days of reading

---

Well, it wasn't so bad. I thought I did less, but I'm still on the baseline. While the count did lower because I stopped writing the book for a couple of days, I actually had a better week, in spite of everything. D&D got cancelled, hence I'm posting. I'm taking the day to prepare for the week ahead, including to seek a place to work at during the afternoons, plus I'll be moving to a different room that gets less direct sunlight on one part. I'll move things slowly. There I'll be cooler, I'll have more space to work out (finally, I'll be able to do Reverse Angels properly because this house was built for people who didn't stand above 1.7 meters, and I don't want to convert that to Bald Eagle units), and it'd be impossible to have my sleep interrupted, because the only window can only be accessed from through the roof, and only I have the keys to the roof, so no peeping toms. To my surprise, the Wi-Fi signal is better, but that's likely because it isn't as far as my current room. There's also enough furniture to actually keep my stuff organized, so I don't have to switch my notebooks all over the place.

The room still gets hot, but at least it isn't an inferno like this one.

 

[Sólveig]

Okay, things might change for good this week. I went back to basics and managed to do the 365 challenge by repeating myself every little step: first, get the notepad. Write the number for the entry, then write the space for the starting time and the end time, then write the space to write down the final wordcount, and then put on the date. Now, write the idea in the whiteboard. Think about it. Then just write one line. Line's done, do another one, and another one... pause. Where does this leads to? Take the first path you see. Write another sentence... complete a line, complete a paragraph...

There were no hiccups. That was just for the challenge. I did the same to avoid falling down the content hole too. And I'll be doing the same for journaling tonight. I can't tell whether I'll carry on with my book now or not, but it doesn't matter to me. I do need to put down some flaws that I'll work on once I start editing, because there's no way the story has a sequence; it is non-linear, and it makes sense for it to be that way. For now, the manuscript looks like a collection of scenes that have no sense; some start to contradict themselves, but that's completely fine. I started this on a whim, so I'm expecting to find lots of mistakes. However, since I'm closer to 25%, I can actually have a feeling on how I'm doing, and I'm actually doing good. Maybe I deviated a bit from the social commentary, but that's still there.

As I said in my weekly report, D&D got cancelled at the last minute. Two down: one is on shift, the other one got effed by his paper, so he nearly started from scratch and spent the entire day fixing it. That's fine. Sundays are for me to relax, and I did that. I took the advantage to help with the laundry, and left one blanket hanging right there, blocking direct sunlight into my window, which helped to be less hot.

I think I'm not going to write tonight, but rather do the first step for the 12 Week Year, which oddly enough is in line with one of the activities I'm doing.

Had a mixture of some bad news and good news. One of those bad news got me anxious because I can't stop thinking how it could've been me. Is not someone I know, but more of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend... They have been in prison for seven or eight months already because they were caught on camera by the press, holding the flag, during the protests after the elections. First page too, apparenly; one big picture, ando ne hell of a big mistake. I don't even need to say anything so you learn what happened next. Turns out that now, that family broke apart: their child is sick, their sibling is depressed, and they don't even know that their child is sick. Officers know, but refuse to tell them anything because they think they will take their own lives upon learning it. Coming from torturers (I am not exaggerating; this is true and has been reported for years already, probably since the dictatorship begun, and even earlier; there's an entire Wikipedia article that pretty much shows torture has always been part of our history even before the Conquistadors came), how humane of them! I don't even know which is more cruel. All I can think of is how it could've been me.

Learning that didn't kill my day. It was just a reminder that I'm extremely lucky, and opportunities like this are not meant to be wasted.

March 9th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Elbow Plank Arm Raises +EC
Count: 1774 - 1770 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 9
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 542 words in 27 minutes! (82/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
542 words in 27 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Well, I did not have any time to do anything. Thankfully, I only planned out two things, and I could do one. The other one... well, there was an attempt. Still, I think I can do it tonight because it's quick, and it's better to do it at this time, without any interruptions. I was supposed to do it last night, but I didn't.

I stole someone's idea for the 365 today. Well, I did it because the idea was right up my alley, but also because they asked for help. Doing my take on it actually showed me a way to help them get unstuck, so I shared my insights... and I also learned that this same lesson about writing the same thing for a year? You know, that once you start working, you'll find what you're looking for? Other than my suggestion, there were others, and I just figured that you can take a story into many different places without making any of those places canon. For instance, start from Chapter 1, which we'll call Status Quo. Chapter 2 would be the Inciting Incident. I figured they could write three of the suggestions, get some insights from it on their own, and make a choice. They can choose an idea, an amalgamation, or neither; it doesn't matter. The act of writing them alone is what matters because once you start writing them, you'll find what you're looking for. Writing many paths doesn't make them canon; they are just a possibility. They can be discarded, yes, but the real mistake is to not send them to the trash. They can always be used later for the same project, or upcycled for future projects. Who knows whether they'll be the seeds for a next project, or the parts that'll get you unstuck in your next project?

I do want to collab with this author at some point though... once I get back into my publishing rhythm.

Speaking of it. the thing that I planned out? I scouted out a few places and found some spots. I guess the best one is the same park I used to go to for Qi Gong, and I do want to get back into Qi Gong because it's been a while. I did it after the power came back; the powercut felt too short today, but that could be because I read, and then napped through it. Like I said, I did not have time to do anything, but scouting the city not only did good for my walking quota, but I also found the spots that I mentioned. There's also that park with the benches I mentioned, but I found it in quite bad shape today. One of the tables had iguana feces on it, and there's not enough shade during the afternoon. There's a library nearby, but I've been there, it's quite hot, and it is rife with mosquitoes. They do work on the morning only though.

So, aside from my local bakery, and the community center, and another bakery further away, there's a park that has no benches, but fine by me! I wouldn't mind sitting on the floor and writing, especially when there's plenty of trees and a lot of shade, and tons of wind... I'm also trying to go closer to nature because nature helps with ADHD symptoms. There's another park that has even more nature, and I can sit by the roots of a tree, but it's further away, so it's an even longer sweaty walk. In any case, I have my writing spots, so all I need to do is bring my notebooks and my pens.

Speaking of which, someone donated an entire office supplies' shop woth of stuff to the TCM class and consult at the non-profit. Since I'm friends with them, I got a stack of notepads, two notebooks, and six black ballpoint pens. It was actually an entire box of pens, and most will go to the consult. I also got another pencil sharpener, which is okay? I'm not complaining, it's just that the one I have is still good, but I'll take a second one, I don't mind. I don't use pencils, but for colors I do need a sharpener.

Honestly, I'm more compelled to write now. I have class on Wednesday, but I can see myself going to the park on Friday if a powercut strikes, or if it's just too hot in the house to focus. I could go tomorrow if it's just too damn hot in here.

Also, I may need to spend more time planning, and preplan my workouts at the beginning of the week.

I finished doing the inventory of one shelf in the library. We have 181 books on that shelf, and there's still space for more.

March 10th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Scorpion Twists +EC
Count: 1775 - 1771 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
7 Full Burpees
4 Full Burpees
20 Full Burpees
WoD: Boy, That Escalated Quickly - LVL III +EC +Rest between levels
Monday +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 16 Full Burpees | 16 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 9 (130 - 60 - 40) | Day 10
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 626 words in 41 minutes! (83/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
626 words in 41 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

(Not a) Watch Report: This is awesome. I just finished writing my Vision, which is the same Vision that I wrote last year, but I went into more specifics, following the instructios of The 12 Week Year, including answering some questions that actually broke my thinking. Not only that, but I realized a major thing I wasn't doing before: I didn't have actual goals for every 12 weeks. I had weekly goals, but if you go back a few pages and look at my total wordcount for last year, you'll notice that I said something: I wrote a lot of words, but very few of them amounted onto something. The huge majority of them went nowhere. Only in one single month, which was November, not only I got the highest wordcount of 2024, but also was the time in which I finished something. It was NaNoWriMo, and I was focused. The rest of the year, I was scattered.

That's why I failed: not having goals for every 12 weeks will only result in scattered goals. But, if I write goals for every 12-week period, I can turn those weekly goals into focused goals. Is not the same to write a weekly goal that says "publish a story" than write a 12-week goal that says "write an entire series and publish one episode weekly." It sounds like the same, but the latter one gives me an actual destination. The former is easier, but once done that week... what comes next?

So yeah, as it turns out, being scattered... sucks. Even if I drop this structure later on because I may feel it might be too tight, or whatever the case (even though I love to break down the year like this), this is one hell of an important lesson that I'm definitely putting somewhere. Focused > Scattered. My goals should actually be built around a destination rather than just ticking some item off the list.

I mean, I wanted to seek for places to write out of home. I found some, and now I feel more motivate to go out and write. All because I wanted to solve the issue of not writing during the powercuts even when I wanted to write, but the heat didn't allow me to. That was the main goal, and the little one today was to go out and scout the city. See what I mean? It lead me somewhere instead of being just an item to tick off.

 

[TopNotch]

Yay for the stationery haul!

 

[Laura Rainbow Dragon]

Glad you're getting a new space with less heat and more privacy!
Cheers also for the stationery haul!

 

[Sólveig]

Wow, my body asked for me to stop. I've been sleeping poorly, and yesterday I was just nodding off in the middle of the afternoon. I took it as a full rest day for everything, body and mind, and decided to do absolutely nothing. I was at my bare minimum: 365 challenge, and just the morning and night routines. I went to bed early, and I slept for 11 hours. I'm still slightly tired, but I can include Burpees today. Not 300, but up to 100. My right bicep is the one protesting the most.

So yeah, I'll be going to a bare minimum for workouts today, and depending on how I feel, tomorrow too. I'm going to bed early again too because... yeah, my body is demanding it this time, and I'm grateful for it.

E: Typo.

March 11th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Knee-to-elbow Crunches +EC
Count: 1776 - 1772 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 11
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 543 words in 25 minutes! (84/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
543 words in 25 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

I slept twelve hours. I didn't this time, and now I feel much better. I actually did 50 Burpees yesterday, and I'm still good. Got my full rest, so it's perfect. I'm going to bed early again, which is what I needed. I feel better today, so I may do 100 instead of 50. Still not 300 yet, but I'll be on my way for it.

So yeah, another day in which I did absolutely nothing! I even cancelled my class because I wasn't really feeling like it. My body hurt a little, so I just rested the whole way through. Took a walk, looked at the sunset... beautiful. I didn't worry about anything at all. I just let myself go and simply said "today we do nothing!"

March 12th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 6+ (20) Dragon Push-ups +EC
Count: 1777 - 1773 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 11
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 479 words in 29 minutes! (85/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
479 words in 29 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[TopNotch]

An occasional "nothing" day can be very restorative.

 

[Sólveig]

Another day of doing nothing. I was up to do stuff, but I thought I was having a heatstroke. I kid you not, it was a really hot day. Extremely hot. Even after the sun set it was still hot, and it was hotter outside than inside for some reason. I had to write my 365 challenge outside because it was just horrible, and that's how I knew it was hotter outside.

Yeah, I thought I was having a heatstroke for the entire day. Headache, drinking so much water, not eating enough... turns out the latter was the reason for the headache and not the heat. All I did was walk and one workout, and that's it. Forget about Burpees; the day was just horrible. From the moment it started until midnight, this entire city felt like it got a sun beam extremely focused, as if a magnifying glass was a dome above us, roasting us with steam. Not even wind.

I missed the eclipse though. I went to bed, tired, and finally relaxed that the temperature lowered at the end of the day. Days like these are dangerous. No heatstroke for me, but it was close.

March 13th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 March Jacks +EC
Count: 1778 - 1774 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
My Happy Place
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 11
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 540 words in 28 minutes! (86/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
540 words in 28 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

In simple words, I had a bad day. A day of interruptions, a day of a powercut that started either way too punctual, or time blindness got me, a powercut that was right in the middle of me messing around with the computer... and an urgency because I thought the tank emptied out in a single day, but no, it was just the pipe that was clogged.

It was a troublesome day, but everything got fixed at the end of the day. The 365 challenge opened up one WIP into something that I didn't expect, and I also made some new plans for my writing, taking in the fact of just dedicating one hour per project, or writing up to 6 pages; whichever comes first. I can tackle anything that is handwritten before o during the powercut, so that after the powercut I can do anything digital. Because there are more hours before and during the powercut, I can count on interruptions, so I can split them all however I want. I didn't write these plans just yet, but it's something, at least.

I also decided to pick my phone project back up and do how-much-ever time I can allocate to it during the powercuts whenever I'm outside, or I'm still at home, or I just don't want to drag my equipment with me. I can still read. That's all I have my phone for since anything that allows me to doomscroll is gone: either I write, or I read.

So yeah, this week, appropiately named "First Death" in my BuJo was pretty much downtime, and I had quite a lot of foresight with its name. Not a good day, but at least I rested, repaired, and I'm ready to start a new. I do have some goals for today though.

March 14th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Side Leg Raises +EC
Count: 1779 - 1775 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 11
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 519 words in 26 minutes! (87/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
519 words in 26 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

It went to hell immediately after I posted because of chores. I survived, and that's it.

March 15th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Butt Kicks +EC
Count: 1780 - 1776 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Lunges | 16 Squats | 4 Lunges | 10 Jumping Jacks | 20 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 11
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 539 words in 25 minutes! (88/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
850 words in 35 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 4099 words
• Burpees: 5 days, 600 Burpees
• 3 days of reading

---

It was a complete curveball. Sleep deprivation got to me, now I woke up sick of my stomach... I did not carry on with my projects, my Burpee count went extremely low, the weather was extremely hot... I survived, but that was it. I couldn't adapt to this week, in spite of my efforts. I made mistakes, and I think the most glaring one is that I'm still behaving like a neurotypical person without realizing I'm setting myself up for failure that way. Everything that I do must be done in a very formulaic way, step by step, just to get my dopamine reserves going, and start rolling the boulder up. Thing is I try to roll up the biggest boulder without being strong enough to hold it.

I'm going to do something different and take responsability for this failure of a week. None of this is my fault, yet I should've known better and adapted to the circumstances, and I think I started doing so. I found a few writing spots outside of home, I found a flexible way to write, which is just between 6 to 12 pages daily before or during a powercut, and leave the digital work after the powercut, which can just be one or two hours, or writing 1500 words. Spreading 4500 words throughout the day like that allows me for a lot of flexibility, and I take in consideration any issues that might arise in some days. I may not do 100%, but again, while 100% is cool, I am not aiming at 100%. As long as I keep moving forward, I'll be fine, even if it is just one page; it's still one page forward.

It was just a bad week. I'll make it better next time. I'm still impressed that I did more than half of 1050 Burpees. That alone deserves some credit.

I was the one to cancel for D&D today. I woke up feeling sick. I wasn't sure if I could make it or not, but I preferred to go the safe route and cancel out.

 

[Sólveig]

So I took my gloves off today. I managed to recover from whatever got my stomach this morning, and well, it was Sunday as usual; break day, but also some planning. Not all planning, but some planning. I took better advantage of my space on my BuJo to turn some goals into more specific activities, and I already tackled one half-way through: creating a flexible routine for my writing in order to keep the words flowing. The keyword here is flexible.

The goal is simple: I have up to four projects; two handwritten, two digital. I can only write for 60 minutes on each project, aiming to get 1500 words on digital, or 6 pages on handwriting, per project. Either I write 1500 words/6 pages, or I write for 60 minutes on each project. If I get to do both, perfect, but the important part is writing just for that time alone. The handwritten projects will take priority as I'll be using the times before and during the powercut to do them, while the digital efforts will happen after the powercut. I can switch around, and I can split those 60 minutes per project however I want. It doesn't matter how I do it, what matters is to get the job done. Even if I only write one page of one project, it's still one page forward, and a poorly written page is far much better than no pages written at all.

But why four projects; two per support? To set myself an actual limit. Plus, I'm not going to end up in that routine with four projects from the get go. I'll start with two, and then I'll add up. The goal is to not do 100%, but just do little by little each day. The numbers aren't there as a way to earn a trophy, but to actually set a limit of how much work I can put. Reminder: writing is HIIT. but the law of diminishing return applies heavily upon me. The longer I write, the more the quality drops. Besides, limiting myself to up to 4 hours daily, and with the fact that I can split them in chunks of 10, 20, 30, 40, or 50 minutes is really, really flexible, and it will help me to adapt on weeks like the one I just had.

So, today, while I got caught up in the content hole, I rested, I focused on just recovering from whatever I woke up with, do some administrative work, and now I'm ready to slowly ease myself into that writing routine before I start working on my goals for the incoming quarter. I already know that, by the time Week 12 from the incoming quarter hits, I want to be under this routine. Part of my goal is to also publish a story weekly; really short stuff. One of the projects is a daily thing that I plan to do from Monday to Friday. The twist is that I should have a minimum of three days (4500 words) written for that project, weekly. That way I'll end up with 36 short stories, with 12 of them published, and 24 loaded up. 24 stories on queue buys me six months worth of time. I'm going with quantity over quality for this one, at least from the beginning. So this is just the minimum if I only do three out of five days. Three out of five is pretty much me giving slightly more than 50%. With 4 days, I'll have 36 stories, which is nine months, and if I do 100%, meaning all five days, I'll have an entire year worth of a queue. Basically by investing one quarter in just writing short stories, I'm buying up to a year worth of time to dedicate to longer projects. The best thing I can do right now to get started is not by making new content, but actually going back to what I did last year, and start salvaging stuff.

So, what happens to the Watch? It's midnight now, and, sadly, I stayed up. The Watches I'm taking them into account, and I wrote them as a time in which I'm free to do whatever I want. For the Watches, all I need is pretty much to show up, so I can show up and do a digital or a handwritten project... which then leads me into two things: either I'm buying some time off during the day, or I can do a double or nothing and get some extra work done. Or I can just use the Watch as downtime, or simply skip them and keep sleeping.

Again, the key here is flexibility. I already wrote all of it on two index cards; one of them is taped on the wall, and the other is inside my BuJo, as a bookmark for the current day.

Let's see how this turns out, because I'm quite excited for tomorrow. This week I'll be testing it up, plus with the powercuts and stuff, I can work on its flexibility perfectly. Aiming for progress, not 100%.

I'm going back into working out too. Guess what I went back to today.

March 16th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Backfists +EC
Count: 1781 - 1777 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Full Burpees
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 11 (90 - 50 - 40) | Day 12
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 533 words in 25 minutes! (89/90)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
796 words in 35 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

I did have and did not have enough time yesterday. What the f*ck?

That's both time blindness and having a busy day combined. At least I managed to write, even though it was the wrong work, but through the wrong work I found out my routine is actually doable. Granted I did not push the needle forward as much as I expected, but hey, if it's doable, then it's doable. I believe I need to make a few commitments, so this is quite cool, and I mean it! I started something overdue that I can take my time with it, and put some ground rules for it (though I said "f*ck all" to the rules yesterday because I got hoodwinked into writing), and the 365 had many distractions, hence it took me 46 minutes to write instead of the usual half an hour.

So far a rocky start. I got distracted, so my Burpees were below 300, but they are at baseline, which is completely fine. I have a stressful day ahead, so I'm going to finish my admin because it was overdue. Already put my steps to follow now.

I also didn't write at night. Because I did not have and did have enough time yesterday, things got pushed to the evening... and I ended up just watching stuff instead. No content hole, just watching Jojo's again. It's always the final episodes that are a slippery slope.

March 17th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Pacer Steps +EC
Count: 1782 - 1778 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
7 Full Burpees
20 Full Burpees
Monday +EC
One Kick (Side Kick) - LVL III +EC +Rest between levels +I also sent my laundry basket flying because I didn't see it during a Side-to-side
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 13 (100 - 40 - 40) | Day 14
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 552 words in 46 minutes! (90/90) New Milestone!
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1468 words in 97 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

I don't know what happened.

Okay, I know what happened. The day was going well... until I went down the content hole. I just had it, but then I fell through. I cleared some stuff up from my desk, put some notes where they should be, and got ready to write... but then I fell down the content hole, and I just got out of it... with 292 words of work done today.

It's still one page worth of progress. I'm on Day 91. There are only two milestones left: 180 days, and 365 days. We have the momentum, now it's time to keep it up on the long run. It is getting tiring, but the reason I wrote so little it's because it was a... "script." Actually, it was a chat log. This time, I didn't do it alone.

The notes that I put where they should be... yeah, there was one that was just a Ruri Ohama video on ADHD. It was her FOCUS method; an acronym. Took her 20 minutes to went over it, and the acronym were my only notes. Turns out, on the S part of the acronym, Stimulate Strategically, it's all about keeping all senses stimulated. She didn't went over taste, and that could just be as simple as chewing gum, but I guess it crosses over with olfactory, I don't know, she didn't went over the anatomy of it, and I didn't care enough to look for it. I'm digressing.

It's the visual an auditory element I'm talking about. My unique way of body doubling actually fills up the visual and auditory. It was by pure coincidence that [REDACTED] is with me tonight. I wasn't planning on body doubling. It's been a while. All I wanted is to just do the 365, post my log, and then sleep, but now that I'm with her... well, I felt the calling, and as I'm writing this, I have the thesis next to me, ready to be written on again. I'll probably finish what I started, which will only be... I guess a page or two; I don't know. I'm going to read over it to catch up, and then I'll write, as I am compelled to do it.

The weather is what gets me on the physical though, as I seriously can't stand being notoriously hot, and drenched in sweat. I'll link the video tomorrow; this approach to ADHD is one I can get behind with, especially the S. I actually picked up on the fact that, when I'm deeply paying attention, I'm always keeping my hands busy with something. Lately it's my pen. It's just a simple ballpoint pen that you can get anywhere; it's cheap, it's clear, is not a Bic, but it may just be one because it looks too similar. Thing is the plastic tube has a nice texture that I recently discovered, one cap can be twisted, and the other cap, the one that covers the point, has a quiet click. It doesn't happen with all pens though. Then again, that pen that only lasted me for two weeks? The cap had a loud click that I actually loved, as if I just found a new musical note exists.

It's a silly stupid thing, but yeah, I noticed for a while that fidgeting helps, and I've been fidgeting with my pens a lot. I guess I'm actually becoming aware of what's working and what's not, and what didn't work today is falling down the content hole.

I guess I should body double more often. Like I said, I did not plan any of it today, it just happened, and I'm glad it did because I need to go back and follow my Polaris.

200 Burpees today. Hoping for it to be 300 tomorrow again. The content hole ruined me.

March 18th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 W-extensions +EC
Count: 1783 - 1779 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
WoD: Game On - LVL III +Megaset
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 8 Squats
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 15 (100 - 50 - 50) | Day 16
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 292 words in 29 minutes! (91/180)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
292 words in 29 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

The notes that I put where they should be... yeah, there was one that was just a Ruri Ohama video on ADHD. It was her FOCUS method; an acronym. Took her 20 minutes to went over it, and the acronym were my only notes. Turns out, on the S part of the acronym, Stimulate Strategically, it's all about keeping all senses stimulated. She didn't went over taste, and that could just be as simple as chewing gum, but I guess it crosses over with olfactory, I don't know, she didn't went over the anatomy of it, and I didn't care enough to look for it. I'm digressing.

This was the framework I mentioned.

 

[Sólveig]

Minor issue of the day is that I didn't do more than 500 words. Still doing the 365. I thought I'd write last night, but I didn't. I just went a bit angry and decided to sleep. Another day in which I'm sleeping late today, but now I am not only in a better mood to write, but also I feel the calling of both the muse, and the duty. There's a reason why I think not writing today is a minor issue. A day wasn't wasted.

In fact, the investment of today is going to pay off within the next three months. I can feel that. I did a big lesson of The 12 Week Year, which is actually putting the goals for the incoming year. What I completely forgot is that the chapter tells you that you should not just write your goals, but also your whys. That was a powerful thing. The book went all about the power of a Vision statement, but this time is forcing me to connect my goals to the Vision; it's forcing me to relate those things. I didn't handwrite it, but that's something I'll pull off tomorrow. In fact, many things I'll pull off tomorrow. Today was just busy: waking up late, a class, expecting for a powercut that never happened, house chores... It all stacked up, which is fine, alright? It's fine! I didn't move the needle forward, but I got the fuel for the engine. Hell, I modified the bike, so now it's faster.

So yeah, now I'm going to do some admin, and then I am carrying on with my book. Funny enough, I learned today that Twitch has streams for body doubling. There's plenty of people there having the "study/work with me" type of stream going. I actually joked about it on Discord making a reference to my unique way of body doubling, plus something that I planned out for NaNo last year... which then lead into an idea that I froze on my notebook... feels more suited for a VN rather than a traditional piece of fiction, honestly.

Anyway, my reason for carrying on tonight especifically is because [EXPUNGED] and the love triangle in my heart feels particularly intense, so I really feel the calling of writing the book.

Things went back to normal today, within its own parameters.

March 19th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 W-extensions +EC
Count: 1784 - 1780 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Zombie - LVL SS +No rest
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Jumping Jacks
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 17 (110 - 60 - 60) | Day 18
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 484 words in 22 minutes! (92/180)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
484 words in 22 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 47/212 Pages (22.8%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Man, yesterday was horrible again. I went down the content hole, and I paid a huge price for it. However, it didn't matter, because I got to carry on with my book (finally)! I also established my goals for the next twelve weeks, with tactics and all... everything is good. The 365 was a bit of a chore. The idea wasn't difficult to come up with; I just had it instantly, as I saw the blank paper. It's just that I'm leaving it always to the end of the day...

When it comes to the workout department, well... I took a break. Zombie got me DOMS. Besides, I was slightly tired, so I thought I'd sleep early, but nope! Turns out the water came. As soon as it was over, I went to finish the 365. I tried to post, but decided to just go to bed instead.

In spite of everything, I had a good mood.

March 20th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 198

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 10 Jumping Lunges +EC
Count: 1785 - 1781 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Nothing right now
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear
Extreme HIIT

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
20 Full Burpees
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Lunges
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Chest & Arms: Day 19
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 534 words in 25 minutes! (93/180)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1700 words in 75 minutes!
1500 Get!
Project: Personal Hell: 52/212 Pages (24.5%)
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages
Me Before You - 31%

---

Other Victories: