@RangerX thank you so much for kicking this off and your question is pure gold. Most times what stops us from getting as fit as we want to is life itself. The world is complex and the way we fit in it even more so. In the struggle to make it all work we often sacrifice the things we take for granted: our physical and mental health. It is usually a health scare of some kind that snaps us back to a more sensible way of doing things and by 'sensible' I really mean feasible.
Stress, initially, activates the sympathetic nervous system, which directly guides what is popularly known as the 'fight or flight' response and dampens down inflammation in the body to better release resources to allocate to that response. At the same time it excites the central nervous system and the endocrine system in the body (because they play an active role in the excitation levels of the sympathetic nervous system) and because both of these systems are involved in a constant interplay with the immune system, it affects that as well. The initial response of the immune system to stress is positive. However, over time, chronic stress that's left unmanaged dysregulates the immune system and results in a host of bad health outcomes that range from colds and the flu to mental health episodes and cancer. There is a relatively comprehensive, 2019 study that looks at all that
here.
That study talks about interventions such as exercise, nutrition and self-care (of which sleep is an inescapable aspect).
You have a high degree of self-awareness. You know your life is unpredictable and you also realize you're experiencing high levels of stress. Every balanced approach to long-lasting health rests on three obvious pillars:
- Exercise (or physical activity)
- Nutrition
- Sleep
The challenge you're facing is making it work in a way that is workable, will not detract from your role as a mother, won't take you away from the current workload you face and still help you manage your stress levels. You're already getting in non-exercise thermogenesis activity (
NEAT for short) by walking, mostly and you're trying to fix your nutrition. The problem is that the general level of unpredictability in your life is draining and it is that energy drain which then makes it harder to stick to anything consistently or even find the time to do something that is going to be beneficial to you.
I have three suggestions to make here that may be of direct help to you: First, stop trying to fix everything at once. It's too much. You can't create the perfect exercise routine, fix your nutrition which will require a more conscious effort to cook or get healthier, balanced meals and reduce your stress levels while trying to juggle the unpredictable and resource-draining parts of your life. This is a recipe for failure and when you do fail you then guilt yourself which only makes things worse. Work, instead, on making any changes that are easier to make right now. Can you walk a little more or add a little more NEAT activity to your day by changing something you're already doing? Do that first. Can you improve your nutrition by reducing your intake of or cutting out entirely foods like sugar and alcohol, which increase your inflammation levels and add to the general sense of stress you experience? Do that first. Make all these little changes and be methodical and patient, give them time to take effect. Know that anything you do to reduce the excess easy-source carbohydrates from your diet (by reducing or cutting out food and drink items like processed white bread, sweets, sugar, soda drinks and alcohol) you're priming your body to better deal with the effects of sleep deprivation (or inconsistent sleep). There is a very recent study on that in the military,
here.
Second, since you know to expect a certain level of chaos in your life and worklife come to terms with that. The amount of control we experience over our life is important to the healthy function of our brain and body. When we feel we have no control things get stressful and, over time, internally our organs are effected which directly impacts our health. Navy SEALs are some of the best trained people on the planet. They're taught to be effective and calm in chaotic environments over which they have zero control by adopting a specific mindset which reframes their experience as positive instead of negative. I detail some of this here:
While the reframing is a mental trick the effects it has on the body in terms of stress reduction, clearer thinking, an improved sense of control and an enhanced physical and mental experience are undeniable. Workout what mental imagery you can employ that allows you to internally manage the stress you feel so you feel more capable.
Finally, while getting more sleep is not an option that's currently available to you, you can use some of the time you have (and it only needs as little as three minutes) to do some mental housekeeping by meditating. Meditation, over time, increases brain
gray matter, improves
brain density and leads to improved
cognition (there are studies behind each link I added here). It also helps with brain structural health and improves neurogenesis in the brain. It does, in other words, for the brain what exercise does for the body.
Meditation is a skill, like any other, and we have a handy guide you
could use.
Provided you apply these three things, in the first instance, you will notice a marked change in your own management of the challenges you experience and that will become a solid basis for further change you can make on your own.
Our Self-Care and Wellbeing channel has a lot of short videos that might be of use to you. You will find its contents
here.
Be fully aware of your own emotions in all this. As you understand them and their source you begin to better understand how you function and that is a solid basis for further improvements.
I hope all this helps a little. Feel free to come back with anything you think I need to explain further or give better (or more) examples of or expand on.