Back on it

[Quetzal]

Hi all,

I'm not usually one for forums but I'm back on a fitness journey. I realized I do like aspects of working out, but being a fat person (who is not interested IWL, unintentional is fine, because I am very prone to eating disorders) it's hard to find resources and community. I love Darebee and I'm currently 4 days into Baseline.

I'm still adapting to the new morning routine, waking up about 15-20 minutes earlier than I used to (and that's gonna increase once I have access to some cardio equipment in a month), so I mostly feel grumpy and moody, especially at work. But if nothing else I'm remembering to do my skincare routine every morning now.

My goals for this program are to set a baseline (haha) for working out. I'm an adhder so I don't have habits, I have combos. So I want to have a 30 day combo. I've set a few rewards for myself for the next month to try to bribe myself including a bag I've been wanting and some new clothes.

Longer term I want to to do 3-4 bigger workouts per week for a year to earn a Steam Deck.

Ultra long term, I think it would be a lot of fun to work my way through ALL of the Darebee programs.

I'm still struggling to figure out how to track my progress without focused on my weight, but that's a problem for future me.

 

[Anek]

Hello and welcome!

 

[Mamatigerj]

Welcome!

 

[aku-chan]

 

[Mianevem]

Welcome and good luck on your journey!

 

[Quetzal]

HI everyone! Thanks for all the welcomes!

I just finished day 5 of baseline and I wish I could say I felt good. I'm still not used to waking up at 5:45, and I have dinner with my dad tonight which is always tough, I can never predict how moods. But we're going to a great Italian place and I'm happy to see my stepbrother because I missed his actual birthday.

The sit to stand chair squats are not getting easier but they are one of my favourites. I do tend to go a bit lower than regular dining chair height on account of not having any (small condo, no room for a table, only barstools), so I use the platform part of my bed. I figure a few inches will give me a deeper seated squat so it balances out.

Work today is an average Friday, but I am choosing violence with one of our accounts payable because she's been a real problem for my staff. So that'll be fun.

Halfway to my first ten day goal, I'm already further than my last Darebee attempt. Gotta make it passed 12 for a PB

 

[Fremen]

Welcome

 

[Quetzal]

Day 6 of Baseline has been good! I got to sleep! And boy did I sleep, like the dead. I had a very long day on top of adjusting to my new alarm so I think it was good I rested.

It was a low intensity day with a fair amount of stretching (imo) so I had a good time.

Saturday is my self care day. I do a big shampoo and treatment on my hair, going to pair that with a face mask this time around. I run my weekly errands which luckily this week is just the bakery, and today is the astronomical equinox! I'm a Pagan so I do a little bit of celebrating for it, but nothing major.

Hoping you all have an awesome weekend!

 

[Quetzal]

Today seriously upped the ante with arm workouts.

I overslept and my sleep tracker didn't track (my poor Pokemon) and I was a little under the influence yesterday so I'm pretty sure that had a negative effect on the workout. But it was a good shoulder burn.

Sundays are low key for me. I kinda do whatever I want, don't usually leave the house unless I have to, and just vibe. I have a few spiritual classes I'd like to do, as well as move forward on my Pokemon Silver nuzlocke where I am Tony Khan and all my Pokemon are named after aew wrestlers. Yes I am that much of a freak

 

[Quetzal]

Today is the first day of week two! If I finish this week I'll have hit a PB. Which is kinda sad when you think about it.

Doing these workouts every day, even though they are still very low key, has brought up lots of painful memories and I'm starting to feel like it's its own form of shadow work. I work out with only my hall light and my bedside table light on because I'm afraid to be perceived. I live alone, and the cats don't care what I'm doing every morning. But this fear of perception is such a huge thing I'll struggle with when I actually start going to the gym and other people will be there.

It 100000% stems back to grade school gym class where we would get like one week of stuff I found fun, like cardio or calisthenics, then football, baseball, soccer, etc. Competitive sports where no one wants the fat kid who isn't coordinated and afraid of the ball. I get most kids would find that more fun than half an hour on an elliptical a few times a week but I wish we had the option. Even I high school I wouldn't have been allowed to take the circuit training class unless I had taken three regular gym credits. One was required so I knocked it out and never looked back.

But now I'm like... Excited to get to the gym at the end of this 30 days. 22 now I guess.

I hope everyone has an ok Monday. Work is ramping up for me and I've felt depression sink in pretty strongly. So.

 

[Mamatigerj]

 

[Quetzal]

Hi all! I did it! Ten days of a program!! Two arm days in a row

But I did it. I stuck with it. Friday will be a PB but I hit ten days so that means I bought the duffel bag I've been eyeing from AEW. It'll double as a nice overnight bag for Thanksgiving and Christmas and Easter when I'm out of town to visit family, but it'll also be a great regular gym bag.

And yesterday I ordered some new workout clothes. Part of my motivation is, well, stuff. I am a material girl. And Torrid had buy 4 items get everything, 50% off. I had to get some clothes for the upcoming work photos we're having done and work is paying for those at least (Corporate Goth here I come!)

If I can stick with the next ten days, it's a decent pair of wireless headphones. I don't want to go hard into Bose or Beats just yet because I'll be working out, and my work gives me Amazon gift cards as a perk for working extended hours while my boss is on mat leave, so I'm aiming to keep it under $100 so work pays for them to be fair I could probably argue work should contribute to them because I wear headphones a lot at work.

I hope everyone has a good Wednesday, I'm so proud of myself right now!

 

[JohnStrong]

Congratulations Quetzal - you did it, you made it happen
At this rate you will transform into a Gothic CEO Mastermind of the Corporate Shadow Realm (whoever currently holds that position should start their job search)

 

[Mamatigerj]

Way to go!

 

[Quetzal]

Congratulations Quetzal - you did it, you made it happen
At this rate you will transform into a Gothic CEO Mastermind of the Corporate Shadow Realm (whoever currently holds that position should start their job search)

Hahah omg yes that is the dream right now I'm just the assistant financial controller.

Thanks so much
This community is super supportive

 

[Quetzal]

Way to go!

Thank you!!

 

[Mianevem]

Congrats!

 

[Anek]

Congrats!!

 

[Quetzal]

Well, day 13 is done and I've officially hit my personal best. Every day after today will be better than before.

I'm still feeling a lot of stuff about all of this, and a YouTube video put a nre fear in me: being in the background of someone's tiktok to be made fun of. Because haha so funothr fat lard at the gym. But I think that's my brain being stupid.

I also don't want to go to my dads for Thanksgiving today...and to my extended family's next weekend.

At least the only chore I have to run this morning is the bakery run.

Hope everyone has an awesome weekend!

 

[Tileenah]

A belated welcome and congrats on 10 days and your PB ! This is neat !

 

[Quetzal]

A belated welcome and congrats on 10 days and your PB ! This is neat !

Aww thanks so much!!

 

[Quetzal]

Happy Monday all,

I feel awful! I was up pretty late thanks to a Wrestling event so that didn't end until midnight, and I didn't get to sleep until about 45 minutes after (fitbit says 12:40, Pokemon Sleep says closer to 12:50) and then up at 5:45. I thought about calling out of work, but I decided I'd go, but I did tell my boss I'd be phoning it in a bit (luckily she's super cool with that because I rarely do this)

But I've done day 15, and I'm starting to browse what headphones I want. I may order them a hair earlier than at day 20 because I would like the for Thanksgiving if I can swing it so they'd have to arrive by Friday at the latest. But my gym face care stuff should be here today and I'll test that out for Thanksgiving too, see how well it actually does travel.

I also started a roulette wheel with horror movies to watch this October, about a 50-50 mix of things I've never seen or only seen once, and stuff that ate old classics to me. Yesterday was The Descent, first time watching it, pretty good!

I hope everyone has a great week and if I don't check in before then, happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow Canadians!

 

[GentleOx]

As a long-lost Canadian, have a Happy Thanksgiving too!

The Descent is an amazingly scary movie, glad you liked it! And I see you're into scary movies too!

 

[Quetzal]

As a long-lost Canadian, have a Happy Thanksgiving too!

The Descent is an amazingly scary movie, glad you liked it! And I see you're into scary movies too!

I'm super into horror! This is the first year I'm trying to watch one movie per day in October and there is a lot of like classics I've never actually seen, like Nightmare on Elm Street. My mom wasn't into slasher style, so I cut my teeth on more psychological thrillers. Personally I like monster/alien ones. Greys terrify me lol

 

[Quetzal]

Its Wednesday and I'm feeling introspective. I've got 17/30, days completed which seems so wild to me. I like that Darebee isn't like, a predictable program. I mean, it is. There are repeats of days, but for the most part it's not "every second day of the week is this, and every 4th is this"

It keeps in engaging for an adhd brain like mine.

But it's the time of a program, that two week mark, where I start to feel like I should be "better" by now. I should be thin and beautiful and "fixed" even when that isn't my goal. And I have fixed a lot of things in these two weeks. I've gotten into much better teeth brushing regimen and my gums are showing signs of healing, and they've stopped bleeding. This is huge, for someone who was lucky if she could manage to brush twice a week, so my dentist is thrilled. Thanks to sticking to a schedule, my gut flora has also improved due to better pre- and probiotics, as well as a medication to help my gut move better because mine is borked thanks to some physical trauma I experienced as a kid.

I still want to firm up, and I know two weeks of a low intensity workout for ten or so minutes isn't doing much but I know I have to start somewhere. I can't become a 2+ hour a day gym rat overnight, it's impossible.

I'm probably just moody because Canada Post totally mishandled my Sephora package yesterday so now I have to schlep to a very inconvenient pick up location during work hours, and Thanksgiving is looming, and my family sucks sometimes.

Hope everyone is having a good week so far!

 

[Quetzal]

Happy Friday! Day 19 is done!! I can't believe I'm 2/3rds done my first program. Today though I think I modified a few of the moves just a tad as I have a mild chemical burn under one armpit (thanks Nair). But it's not red and nasty looking so by tomorrow it should be ok. Nair is so finicky but I hate shaving and honestly waxing is a special treat, too expensive here for every day.

Tomorrow I'm off to my extended family for Thanksgiving. It's just overnight, and I've been told two of my cousins won't be there so it'll be very quiet with just 8 people. Thankfully. I like the quiet. I'm grateful I get my own room when we sleep over (though I would prefer a hotel), because I was worried about breaking my streak. But I think it'll be ok, private space, I'm usually up early anyway because I don't sleep well in that house with the mold and cigarette smoke, and it's not a very long or involved workout. Doesn't really stop the anxiety though.

My bag shipped as well, and I'm hoping it'll come by next week (coming from Chicago) but with a holiday Monday I'm betting the following week. I'm itching to get to the gym for some more intense stuff though.

Hope everyone has a great weekend! And happy Thanksgiving Canadian friends!

 

[Quetzal]

My first workout not at home.

I'm at my aunts and honestly it's a pretty awful environment. It's mouldy and damp and always too hot, and overnight my uncle smokes indoors. I sleep in a bed thats older than me, and it's a three hour drive both ways, plus tack on a half hour for me as I carpool with my aunt and she's half a half from me. Thanksgiving was Thanksgiving, not my favorite day, the edibles hit me like a freight train even if they tasted funky. So that was good I guess.

I'm proud of myself for doing the workout because I wouldn't have done it when I got home. I probably won't get into town until 11ish, and then I have a few errands to run before I can go home officially. I'm just emotionally exhausted.

Hope everyone else is doing well!

 

[Quetzal]

I can't believe I've done 24 days!! Stuff is coming together, payroll is this week so I'll finally have the last bit I need for my gym membership.

But I'm struggling. Mentally, only a little bit physically. I'm still in the AuDHD burnout from Thanksgiving and work isn't helping. My routine was all messed up from the holidays too and I just feel so out of it.

I need like a reset day. Honestly I wish I could just be on a n elliptical all day. I find the motion of them very soothing.

Hope everyone is doing good!

 

[Mamatigerj]

 

[Quetzal]

Heya everyone! Life has been busy and I've been kinda resettling but I DID IT!!

I completed Baseline AND I've been to the gym three times now

I've opted to do Vitality next, and already I'm enjoying it. It's a bit more thorough than Baseline I think.

 

[Fremen]

Congrats on Baseline

 

[GentleOx]

Well done!

 

[Montserrat]

Nice, congratulations!

 

[Mamatigerj]

Cheers!

 

[Anek]

Congrats!!

 

[Fremen]

Happy Birthday

 

[Mamatigerj]

I hope you had a