Hey gang. Feels like forever since I worked out, but it's only been three days.
I went to a Chinese banquet dinner yesterday, and ate too much, naturally. So I came to the gym with renewed vigor, and the need to start over on my fitness.
The problem is that I eat too much. I like my snacks and soft drinks and so on. I know my diet isn't working because it's harder for me to fit into my clothes. The programs I'm doing are fine, but I need to have that commitment to eating cleanly.
Anyway, today was W1D1 (starting over) of my... third strength program cycle, I think, and a Push day.
Bench Press: 125 x 8. One rep more than the cycle before, so I'm chuffed. Could possibly have done nine reps, but I'll try that next time.
Incline Press: 112.5 x 5. My first workout with at least four reps a set. Absolute slog!
Larsen Press: 120 x 5. Not feeling it today.
Decline Press: 115 x 5. Ditto.
Rope Pushdown: 11 x 8.
Flat Curls: 16 x 12. I'll work on doing more next time.
I also experienced some mood instability during the gym. A lot of anxiety about how I stack up compared to other people (I did this last night with the people I was sitting next to) and believing myself to be less worthy in response. Also a bit depressed about where I am in life and how I'm going to shift gears and move forward. It kind of subsided a bit after I left the gym and went back home, and I applied some CBT to myself to assuage my doubts. Still... there're roots of uncertainty and frustration that remain. I'll have to work more on staying present and remembering that yes, I have a mood disorder, and it will flare up from time to time.
Also, regarding last night, I historically don't do well at Chinese banquet dinners. As an introvert, they
really aren't my thing. But I didn't drink any of the free-flowing wine. And anytime my sobriety is challenged, but comes out strong, I'll take that as a victory.
Here's a funny clip from Tommy Boy that made me feel better!
Hope your weekend is going well, Bees!
Playing: I'm rapidly getting fed up with Starfield. I can tolerate the crappy performance issues I've been having, even though Cyberpunk 2077 is so much better. I can't stand anymore of the crashing I've been guaranteed. It's like twenty minutes in (or sometimes less) I experience a crash. So... may give it a break, and wait for further patching.
Cyberpunk is fun, in other news, and my dungeon crawling in Stone Soup still goes along steadily.
Watching: I *still* haven't finished V H S 85. Just get too sleepy at night when I set aside time to watch. And this is even more egregious given that I want to start watching The Fall of The House of Usher (Mike Flanagan's latest series).
Also watched some Seal Team at the gym.
Listening to: Tonight's spooky song is quite apropos for Halloween. I select Dance with the Dead - Blood Moon.
I could've picked any of DwtD's songs (and may do so again), as they're all horror themed. They also, not coincidentally, rock out with all guns blazing.