Thank you @JCU @Maegaranthelas and @Mamatigerj and Happy Holidays to you all.

Today's Log (12/26/24)
For whatever reason, I'm pretty tired. I'm holding on the meditation and exercises. I did go on a nature walk with my sister at the fort in our hometown, though, so not completely lazy.

I forgot to say that I drank 34 oz of water yesterday. Today was more of 17 oz. But I'll worry about that as well when I'm back home.
 
Today's and Yesterday's Logs (12/27-28/24)
Whoops. As I was going to bed yesterday, I realized I didn't do a check-in post. And I wasn't getting out of bed for it.

No exercise yesterday and today mostly. Well, yesterday we did go see a live band and I joined some of my dad's friends for dancing so maybe that counts, haha. Definitely need to work on my dance moves (like learn some) for next time. XD

Today was spent pretty much traveling all day. With breaks for food and stretching our legs, it was about a 10 or 11 hour trip back home. The mate was super nice and drove the whole way. (It was better for him anyways). Now that I'm back home I'm gonna try to get back into the exercise stuff again. Well, I'll try to ease back into it, though we've got two more Christmas gathers on the list.

Had `17 oz of water yesterday. Today was 30ish, which is impressive because that's on top of the coffee and soft drinks I treated myself too.

I did manage to finish a small craft I'm making as a surprise for one of my besties. I always forget how nice sewing is.

Small Fern Plush.jpg
 
Thank you @Mamatigerj . :cutter:

Today's Log (12/29/24)
Oh wow! I can't believe how close we are to New Year's! I'm slowly figuring out resolutions and goals and themes for the next year. It's been a bit loose and vague so far though.

I'm also easing back into the normal routine. My chosen family had their Christmas today, but we always meet up for Sundays so that wasn't too different. Tomorrow (today, technically) I've got a Christmas with the mate, MiL, and BiL. That'll be nice. And I picked up a shift for new year's eve. Wondering how that'll go. ^_^;;; But trying to allow myself to take my time with things instead of trying to rush through and get anxious about everything.

  • Meditation Challenge Day 12 done. Still working on chilling for 10 minutes. Mostly struggling with realizing that ten minutes isn't all that long when you think about it.
  • Universal Warm-ups completed. A bit late in the day, but it was still completed and that's what counts. :yes: ((These bee ones are just the cutest! We need more of the!))
  • Back and Core workout held off again. Felt a bit bad about it but I think that's the best call ... maybe. I'm thinking it may get restarted tomorrow.
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] - Same story as above. Though I am gonna have to start thinking about what workout to do after these....
  • Better Sleep Yoga completed. Now off to bed with this puppers.
 
Today's Log (12/30/24)
Nearly the end of the year! I have managed to adjust back to my pre-vacation routine so I'm happy about that. Had another Christmas gathering, though a small one today with just the mate, myself, his mom, and his brother. Got one more we may go to on Saturday for a (old, I think?) coworker of the mate's. Though between the gathering and getting back into the swing of things (plus just ... lack of motivation), I missed some of my game dailies on Twisted Wonderland including the end of an event. Night owl life is hard, yo! :excuseme: Still, not a bad day overall. Plus, I was given leftovers so I didn't have to worry about figuring out what to do for my lunch tomorrow/today at work. :D
  • Meditation Challenge Day 13 (I fixed yesterday's log) completed. Still struggling with the Ommm Mantra, but adjusting to it as they pop-up.
  • Universal Warmups Completed.
  • Back and Core Day 21 Completed.
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] Day 21 Completed.
  • Added on a new one, Balance Workout. Seemed like a good idea. :)
  • Better Sleep Yoga Workout Completed.
  • Drank 34 oz of water today.
Going to bed a little early today, but not too terribly so. Tomorrow may put a bit of work into figuring out resolutions. I got started a bit, at least with organizing it. But that's for tomorrow for the most part. Nighty night time now. :deepsleep:
 
Today's Log (12/31/24)
Happy new year everyone! :fireworks: 2024: :completed: (Lol)

Ended up picking up a work shift last night. That was okay, because we don't really do anything for new years eve. It was actually kinda fun. All the clients got to stay up late and I was even given a silly headband and a popper to celebrate with. More importantly, everyone slept beautifully after that which meant I had a great work shift, lol.

  • Meditation challenge Day 14 completed. Tried to do it right after drinking coffee just before entering work. May need to rethink that plan, haha.
  • Universal Warmups completed.
  • Balance Workout completed. I see that there's a Better Balance, but I think I need to stick with this was for a bit. I can definitely see it helping with both balance and leg strength.
  • Back and Core Day 22 completed.
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] completed.
  • Better Sleep yoga ... is gonna be held off. I wanna give the cat his morning meds, brush teeth, and get onto bed. Especially since I gotta hit the ground running when I wake up since the BF and I scheduled date night in the evening and it'll be late enough when I get up.
  • A 20oz GatorAid and 40oz of water drank.
 
Today's Log (1/1/25)
Not too bad of a start to the new year. Got to spend time with both the mate and had date night with the BF. Ate too much, but that's okay occasionally, haha. Feeling weirdly motivated and optimistic about the new year. Here's hoping it's not misplaced. ^_^;;;

  • Meditation Day 15 completed
  • Universal Warm-ups done
  • Balance workout completed
  • Back and Core Day 23 completed. On the home stretch!
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] Day 23 completed
  • Decided to try out the January challenge. So Abs Standing Day 1 of 30 completed.
  • Better Sleep Yoga just done.
  • A 20oz Gatoraid drank as well as 37oz of water and a glass of my non-sugar sweet tea. ((Forgot to say yesterday, so editing the post to say it.))
Here's hoping I'm not trying to do too much. ^_^;;; And also trying to figure out which workout will be next once I'm done with the Back and Core and Arms ones.
 
Today's Log (1/2/25)
Whelp, I'm already off to a good start. Ended up having a little bit of a breakdown with VRChat stuff. (The short version is entering a world that was poorly made, buffering and glitching to load. I got quickly freaked out and overwhelmed having to do a hard power-off and yanking off the headset. Apparently getting use to that sorta thing is part of "getting your VR legs" as the mate put it.) The mate was very very reassuring. But after that and just generally loosing track of time, ended up with a bit of an abbreviated workout today.

... Though amusingly enough, it's still more of a workout than when I first started up on DareBee. And more than I use to do before that. Huh. That's some food for thought that I realized literally while typing. And I'm also proud of myself for getting at least some done, even if I had to negotiate with myself a little. I feel like that's progress for me. :earz: (Honestly, so is being vulnerable and sharing that kinda stuff. :peekz: Making progress.)

  • Meditation Day 16 completed. Over halfway there!
  • Universal Warmups completed.
  • Abs Standing Day 2 completed.
  • Back and Core Day 24 completed.
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] completed.
  • Balance Workout held off for today.
  • Better Sleep held off for today. I'm already reading for bed, lol.
I heard a great quote from work. You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress simultaneously. Feeling that. Happy of where I am, knowing ways I can do better. On that note, I'm off to bed for the rest of the night and morning. :deepsleep:
 
Today's Log (1/3/25)
I probably only did about half the workout today. Ironically, I don't feel guilty about it despite technically doing less than yesterday. I think my headspace is better today. Part of that is that I've got a bit of a weird soreness (I think I slept funny or something maybe). But also I gave VRChat another go today. Didn't last as long as the mate, but was a couple of hours probably. Was fun socializing for a bit. Though was strangely hungry afterwards (the mate says that's kinda normal while getting your VR legs and he still gets snackish too) and a bit tired, so took it easy after that.
  • Meditation Day 17 done. Slowly getting less distractable. I'm sorta impressed that I was still able to occasionally while doing the Ommm mantra, lol.
  • Standing Abs Challenge Day 3 completed.
  • Held off on Balace Workout
  • Back and Core held off
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] held off
  • Instead of the above, the mate and I ended up going on a little walk. We love doing that, but we both get cold easily so it's hard to do during the winter. Did one lap of the neighborhood, so about 1/2 mile. Not too bad for having not done it in a minute (and, more importantly, we wanted dinner, lol).
  • Better Sleep Yoga done.
Overall, pretty nice day. :bicepz:
 
Today's Log (1/4/25)
The mystery of the weird soreness has been solved! :fireworks:

I was telling the mate about how I was still feeling this weird soreness just to the side of my armpits. Mainly the left side, but kinda on both sides. I told him that I didn't do anything different other than the standing abs challenge, which isn't too bad. It's just elbow-knees and a few others. I started to show him the elbow-knees exercises and as I did, we both had a "ooooooooh" lightbulb moment, lol. Still continuing the exercises, since it's a bit of a dull ache and it's not getting worse by continuing. But, ahhh, I didn't realize that you could really exercise the muscles there. :peekz:

Same exercise set as last time. Had one last Christmas party we were invited too. And going to be fairly early for family day tomorrow.
  • Universal Warmups done
  • Abs Standing Day 4 done
  • Back and Core/Arms of Steel [Seated] held off on
  • Balance held off on
  • Meditation Day 18 done. Experimented at putting it at the end of the day to help me relax before bed.
  • Better Sleep yoga done.
 
Today's Log (1/5/25)
Well, despite things being a little shuffled around today, things went pretty well today. The BF was planning to spend the night anyways (since he has to go into the office tomorrow which is weird for a Monday, and I'm closer to it than his place is and it was our week to host). The weather has turned gross. No snow here, but lots of rain and I think it might have freezed? It came close at least. We not sure what the weather will look like Monday evening, so we did our date night after family day.

Still managed to get a decent chunk of time to myself. Did some exercises, a little art, a bit of reading. Figured I would finish with a bit of gaming and then meditate and do the sleep yoga. Except ... when you're right at the end of a good game, you can't just stop, haha. So adjustments were made and will try again tomorrow. :chuckle:

  • Universal Warmups done
  • Abs Standing Day 5 done
  • Back and Core Day 25 done
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] Day 25 done
  • Balance Workout done
  • Meditation held off
  • Better sleep held off
Now I should probably get to bed here. Could stay up a bit more, honestly. It's only 5:30 am here. But I don't want to loose all the day time tomorrow. ^_^;;;
 
Today's Log (1/6/25)
Not too bad a day so far. Though had a quite a bit of time to myself this evening. The roads are gross right now so I didn't want to go anywhere, haha. I am realizing that I forgot I wanted to get a new SAD light since mine broke. So looking at Amazon a little about that. Also enjoying a new video game I started up, a cozy little thing. Tonight was mostly working on time management to make sure I got a little bit of everything I wanted to do. That's a skill I've been meaning to improve on. And even did a little bit of cooking! Made up a pasta and tried to make my own sauce for it. Not too bad. :D

Exercises
  • Universal Warmup completed
  • Standing Abs Challenge Day 6 completed
  • Back and Core Program Day 26 completed
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] Day 26 completed
  • Balance Workout completed
  • Meditation Challenge Day 19 completed
  • Better Sleep Yoga Workout completed
Been a while since I got all the exercises I wanted to get done, done. :fireworks: Now off to bed and hope that when I wake up, the roads look good for heading into work tonight. Nighty night bee-friends~
 
Today's Log (1/7/25)
Pretty good night at work. A couple of things I wasn't expecting, but wasn't bad at all. Though tired all the same. Most importantly, though, was that I had a great meal because there were a ton of leftovers I could "steal." XD (They gave full permission when I got the job that leftovers are free game.)
  • Universal Warmups done
  • Meditation Day 20 done
  • Standing Abs Day 7 done
  • Back and Core Day 27 done - Nearly killed me but nearing the end
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] Day 27 done - Nice reminder that "seated" does not mean easy, lol
  • Balance - Never got time for
  • Better Sleep - Same as above. Had to pick and choose last night.
Now off to bed I go. And to hope that the snow that's trying to fall this morning doesn't get to thick for my work shift tonight.
 
Today's Yesterday's Log (1/8/25)
Whew! Last night ended up being a bit busy of a night! We had 3 scheduled discharges, one was gonna be while I was there. The day nurse handles most of it, but there were things I needed to do to prep. Which, sweet enough, the day nurse did part of. ;n; But going through med recs and counting pills for three people about fried my brain, lol. Went smoothly though! The snow held off, seems it's gonna hit early Friday morning. And I don't have to go into work until next Friday so I'm happy I can just bunker down for a bit with it. And the leftovers I was encouraged to take will hit the spot. (A bunch of cooked lamb, but also some made from scratch chicken noodle soup [even the noodles were hand-made].) So not a lot of exercising time. But also feeling a bit sore so that might be okay.

  • Universal Warmups done
  • Meditation held off
  • Standing Abs Day 8 done - This is my priority exercise at the moment since it's a January challenge
  • Back and Core held off
  • Arms of Steel held off
  • Balance held off
  • Better Sleep done - I figured this would be a good one to do if I was only doing a little bit.
So we'll see what I end up doing tonight. I'm hoping for better luck since I can stagger these a bit more. But I'm also tired and wanna do things like my new video game, so we'll see how it goes. XD
 
Today's Yesterday's Log (1/9/25)

I'm glad that I am off work for a bit longer than normal. ;n; I'm not 100% sure why (probably a few different things adding up) but I was exhausted yesterday. Never felt like doing much of anything. I did end up doing a bit of my video game but that was the most intense thing I did. As such, I didn't actually get to any of the exercises.

Which may have been a poor choice. I think I also forgot my melatonin last night. I had some pretty bad insomnia going on. ;n;

But, even though I'm tired, I don't feel the same fatigue if that makes sense. Basically yesterday I never felt up to doing anything. Today I feel more like doing things, but I may need to nap or watch my energy levels because I don't know if I can do as much. I am hoping to catch up on the Standing Abs challenge though. I feel gutted that missed a day. I know it's okay if it takes a day longer, but I'm still hoping to complete it in January if possible. :toocute:

:coffee::coffee::bicepz:
 
Today's Log (1/10/25)

Posting a little bit earlier today than normal. But I'm about to switch gears and relax with some Infinity Nikki time, so I wanted to make sure I got this first. Despite the insomnia, I felt fairly energized. I'm sure I'll feel it tomorrow though, haha... ha.... :peekz: But still, I'm glad I bounced back from Thursday's blah mood. I meant to do more exercising, but I didn't want to push myself too hard since I'll probably feel tired tomorrow anyways.
  • Universal Warmups done
  • Meditation held off
  • Standing Abs Day 9 and 10 done - I really wanted to catch back up! The even days aren't too bad on me (honestly, I feel the elbow-knees more in my thighs, haha). And since they exercise different parts of the abs, it's probably okay. I guess I'll find out tomorrow. :sweat:
  • Back and Core held off
  • Arms of Steel held off
  • Balance held off
  • Better Sleep done - held off
Along with these, though, the mate and I bundled up for a walk around the neighborhood. It snowed pretty hard during the day and it's not too often that happens. Maybe once or twice every year or so? So we took one lap, about a half mile, to enjoy the snow. I even made a tiny snowman. ⛄ I was so proud of it until I saw the life-sized one someone else made, lol! Glad I didn't have to drive anywhere though. And glad for the cup of coffee I got once I was back inside.

1-10-25 Snow.jpg

Now to enjoy a little bit of downtime, doing some parallel gaming time with the mate. (He's doing Guild Wars on his computer, haha.) :type::typy:Have a good evening bees~ Stay warm out there. ❄
 
Today's Log (1/11/25)

Pretty good day overall. Though waking up at 10 am is kinda weird these days, haha. Since I need to get up early for tomorrow, I shifted over. Honestly, a 3am-10am sleep schedule is ideal for me, but I never get it. Oh well, maybe when we go FI (financially independent). Until then, night shift life for me for the time being. :)

Doing the standing abs, and having it absolutely kick my ass doing so many knee-to-elbows, I decided to double check something. ... Oh boy. Looks like I accidentally ... doubled the amount of reps I was suppose to do? Apparently it's 1-2-3-4 not 1-and-2-and-3-and-4-and. That's a pretty big difference! :facepalm: I could handle the first few days, but that's getting harder. I debated about keeping how I was going or lowering it. Since I want to do a variety of exercises every day and still have time to do other interests, for the time being I'm going down to the amount suggested in the challenge. But definitely good to remember in the future! And who knows, maybe I can revisit it and try it on hard mode sometime. :)
  • Universal Warmups done
  • Standing Abs Day 11 done - So happy I'm back on track with that! And so happy that it should be a bit easier after today, lol.
  • Back and Core Day 28 done - yeah, back at it! I do wonder how many days in a row you can skip and still count, but ... ahhhhhh .... don't say anything. XD
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] Day 28 done - I'm considering picking up the regular Arms of Steel after this. Not sure though. I also wanna do another RPG fitness and not sure if I wanna pick up two new programs or just one.
  • Meditation Day 21 done - I don't quite know if I'm suppose to do the OM mantra the whole time or not. >_<;;; I still have mixed thoughts. One the one hand, I think it helps with being distracted. On the other hand, it makes me painfully aware of how long 15 minutes can be.
  • Balance Workout - Didn't quite get to this one.
  • Better Sleep Yoga - Didn't get to this one either.
Nighty night bee bees~ Off to bed now. Looking forward to family day with the polycule tomorrow. It sounds like the roads are pretty good. :)
 
Today's Log (1/13/25)
Today was a bit of a hard day for me. From the start I felt fatigued and a bit rushed. A friend of mine uses the term "brain weasels" for when their thoughts go spiraling. I felt like my day was a ripe breeding ground for the brain weasels to frolic. It was not a bad day entirely, but it was hard to see that. When we got back home (it was my BF and his wife's turn to host family day), I ended up crying and doing a lot of talking with the mate about it. And realizing I have a bit of work to do for self-improvement. (Hey, don't we all.) Part of that is being vulnerable here in sharing about it instead of just pretending it was a perfect day with a smile.

By evening, I did pretty decent. I have a game plan I've started. And I feel a bit on track. I am worried about how long I can keep it up, but I feel a bit of peace at the moment. I have decided to do a few things. One is adding on the daily hug challenge, daily gratitude, and counting victories challenges to my daily workout. This should help keep the brain weasels in their pens. I am also giving another go at reading a book my therapist recommended to me. (I saw one briefly when I switched jobs as a temporary thing my workplace at the time offered. It was specifically for imposture syndrome, but became more generalized to my struggle with anxiety.) She strongly recommended Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach. I have had luck with this approach and ACT therapy before. But it's not my normal reading material, so even though it was INCREDIBLY helpful to me personally (as always, mileage may vary), it was hard to stick with. So trying it again. And going to work on cultivating a compassionate (towards self and others) and curious approach instead of the more anxiety and defensive stance I've been having.

My instinct is to apologize for the random wall of text here. I started to type "I'm sorry" but I don't think that's fair to myself or to anyone who's reading. It's your choice to read this, after all. I do not plan to do such long journal entries with each log (as this is mostly an exercise log/check in for me at this time). But maybe occasionally it's not a bad thing?
  • Daily Hug - Day 1 completed. It feels a little silly, but I'm gonna give it a try. One of those, it won't hurt, right? I may add some self-compassionate words with this.
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Standing Abs Challenge - Day 12 completed. Glad I decided to go with the reduced amount at this time.
  • Back and Core - Day 29 completed. So close to the end!
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] - Day 29 completed. Thinking I will do the full version and one of the RPG fitness things next. Gonna spend some time tomorrow narrowing it down to which.
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 22 completed. Debating about adding more self-reflection elements to this. I slipped into it yesterday and I think that was useful.
  • Balance Workout - Completed
  • Better Sleep Yoga - Completed
  • Daily Gratitude- Day 1 Completed - Completing in log for accountability reasons.
    • I'm thankful that the roads were clear and safe to drive after Friday's snowstorm
    • I'm thankful that I have such a thoughtful BF and metamour. They knew their place was cold and I have no cold tolerance, so offered her oversized hoodie for me to wear while there.
    • I'm thankful for the time my mate gave me when getting home, despite not having much time for himself today. That he valued helping me through a difficult situation and patiently heard me out and supported me.
  • Counting Victories- Day 1 Completed.
    • I allowed myself to be vulnerable. I talked a lot with the mate. I updated the BF later about things (we'll probably talk on Tuesday's date night). And opened up to a very close friend for reassurance about our friendship. :teary::wants:
    • I got all my workouts done! And the towels washed and put away!
Now I'm a pretty tired pupper at this point. Gonna get teeth brushed, good night texts sent, then off to bed. :night:
 
Maegaranthelas said:
:pet:Sending you digital hugs to go along with the self-hugs
I am proud of you for opening up about your struggles with those close to you, it's a difficult but so valuable skill to learn.
You can do this, and we have your back :morelove:
Click to expand...

I really appreciate it. I'm gonna give it a try! Though the mate also reminded me this morning that my desire to improve shouldn't be because I need to for their sake, or anything else external. That it shouldn't be fear driven. So I'm gonna try to keep in mind that I'm doing this because I want to better take care of myself. But that I'm a good person already, just by being me.
 
Today's Log (1/13/25)
Pretty good day overall! Got to sleep in and catch up on my sleep debt a good amount. Made up a nice dinner to share with the mate. Got some stuff done. There was a bit of a bump there at the end, but overall it was pretty good. 7/10, and if you removed the last hour it would have been 9/10 easily. Trying to focus on the positives (and even the rough bit there gave me something to chew on and work through, which should be helpful in the long run, I think).
  • Daily Hug - Day 2 completed
  • Universal Warmups - Completed
  • Standing Abs Challenge - Day 13 completed
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 23 completed. Had a LOT of luck today. I did a slightly different style, more curious exploration and such this time. And more welcoming to thoughts as they come, but redirecting as needed. I was able to go the whole time without looking at the clock for the first time, so I think this is the way to go for me. (Inspired by hearing about the Vipassana style of meditation).
  • Back and Core Program - Day 30 completed! :completed:
  • Arms of Steel [Seated] - Day 30 completed! :completed:
  • Balance Workout - Didn't get too. Though it was basically in the others, lol
  • Better Sleep Yoga - Didn't get too.
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 2
    • I'm grateful for the little space heater I can turn on when in the shower so the house isn't super cold when I get out, haha.
    • I'm grateful for times when I can just snuggle next to one of my partners. I'm very tactile so I enjoy those times a lot.
    • I'm grateful that the mate went grocery shopping so I could have an egg with my dinner like I've been wanting.
  • Counting Victories Challenge- Day 2
    • It was a victory to try a different approach to meditation that was more patient, curious, and compassionate.
    • While the bump got rough, at this point I'm able to look at the potential that has for growth later. That's not always an easy thing to do.
    • DOUBLE BADGE DAY BAH-BEE! :fireworks:
So not too bad a day over all. And tomorrow will be date night with the BF. I'm looking forward to it, even if there is an hour+ drive there and back. I also have the next program I want to tackle picked out. -drum roll-

~HERO'S JOURNEY~

Figured if I was gonna do another RPG fitness program, why not the original one? Wasn't originally gonna be my first pick, but figured I'd give it a go. :)
 
Thank you @Fremen @Mamatigerj @JCU @Anek @MadamMeow and @Maegaranthelas ! I'm pretty proud of myself. :D

Today's Log (1/14/25)
Emotionally and mentally, I'm doing a lot better. I talked a lot to the mate about things. And at date night, I got to talk to the BF about stuff as well. Between the two of them, they reassured about their love for me and against some of my personal demons. I don't think I realized how much was weighing on me over the last few days. So while feeling a bit worn out, I feel much more at peace and ready to tackle the world!

... Well, mostly. More of that tomorrow, I'll be ready to tackle the world. Today ended up being a bit more of a rest and recover day, I guess. Which isn't too bad. I'll catch back up tomorrow, so that should be okay. Allowing myself breaks is part of the process, after all. I am doing enough, so this is good.
  • Daily Hug - Day 3 completed - With bonus hugs from the mate and BF, hehe
  • Universal Warmups - Held off
  • Standing Abs Challenge - Held off. Will double up tomorrow to make up for it.
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 24 completed. Getting close to the end of this one too. Wiggy!
  • Balance Workout - Held off
  • Better Sleep Yoga - Held off
  • Hero's Journey - Gonna start tomorrow. That way I'm refreshed for reading the instructions for it.
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 3 complete
    • I'm grateful for Darebee, for helping encourage and keep me accountable with my physical, emotional, and mental health improvement
    • I'm grateful for such a wonderful chosen family, who constantly supports me. They are patient and so loving of me. I couldn't ask for better partners, to be honest.
    • I'm grateful for chocolate, haha. A bit of glucose and a bit of happy chemicals are nice.
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 3 complete
    • It's a small thing, but I got the laundry done and dishwasher unloaded. Even though that's all the chores I did around the house, it's still a victory. It's okay that it's small.
 
Today's Log (1/16/25)
Today was a better day. Well, it started out a bit rough. My kitty Marooney has been a bit more lethargic and not going after his treats like before. I took his weight and he'd lost a little weight so we got him in to see the vet. Blood work, some meds done, have one idea but making sure nothing else is going on. He's 15, 16 years old so we have to be a bit careful at this point. Weirdly enough, despite that and shark week deciding to show up a little early, I'm not in as upset of a mood as I thought I'd be. And not because of exhaustion or anything like that going on. I seem to just be in a better place at the moment. Even got onto my video game a bit more. :) Read a chapter of Radical Acceptance. It hit a bit close to home so that was fun. But the chapter was all about taking pauses (which my BF has suggested to me as well) so I just paused and sat with the emotions a bit when they came up. I think that went well.

  • Daily Hug Challenge - Day 4 completed. Almost forgot though
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 25 completed - I was suppose to do Omm Mantra, but ended up doing it only part of the time. I allowed my brain to travel between physical and emotional or mental stimuli. And when I returned to my breaths, that's when I did the Omm Mantra. Worked pretty well, I think.
  • Abs Standing - Day 15 completed
  • Hero's Journey - Day 1 Level 2 completed. I ... may go on down to level 1 though. That was a lot. :blink:
  • Balance Workout - Skipped this time.
  • Better Sleep - Just did.
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 4 completed
    • I'm grateful we were able to get a same day vet appointment that was also just after the mate getting home so he come go with me.
    • I'm grateful for the stash of chocolate we have for shark week. Though I'm limited to not go too crazy.
    • I'm grateful for our air fryer. I'm more comfortable using it than the oven. So convenient.
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 4 completed
    • Got fully back into reading that book. I know it's helpful. So I would like to read it, but wanting to read it is different, haha. So good job doing that today.
    • Victory in not getting too anxious at the vet's office. Checked in with the mate when Marooney was taken back for blood work and such.
    • Along those lines, I did good checking in with myself. It's a skill I'm still learning. So good job making the effort today.
    • One more I just thought of. Got asked to cover a shift on Monday night. Technically it's a tech one, so only 8 hours instead of 12. I get nervous about doing 3 in a row these days (I get so tired) and I've only partially orientated for their stuff. But I work on Friday so I should be able to get shown the charting and I was partially shown already. So I decided to be brave and offer to help out. (Though I am hoping someone else jumped first, haha!)
Whew! That all said, it's a little after 6am here. I'm about ready for bed, I think. Nighty night bee~ :deepsleep:
 
Today's Log (1/16/25)
Okay, level 2 for Hero's Journey was definitely too much. Woke up feeling pretty sore after doing that and the other exercises. Between the soreness, first full day of shark week (which is usually the hardest), and some troubling news, it wasn't the best day. The weather was nicer, though, so did go out for a mile walk around the neighborhood. <3

Got a call back from the vet's office. We didn't expect that until Friday, possibly Saturday. His blood work had looked good in August, back when we were trying to figure out what was causing some disorientation. Long story short there is that we found out he had hypertension that caused his retina's to detach. They were reversed 100% despite being awfully bad. But now his blood work is pretty bad. Looks like kidney disease, probably chronic kidney disease. Which with his heart murmur and blood pressure, that's going to be difficult to treat. Going to start him on fluids to see how that goes.

Gave an attempt but ended up only doing part of the work out. Gonna rest a bit tomorrow at work and I'll give the Hero's Journey a second attempt on Saturday. Though I am proud of how I handled things. I had to talk to the mate aka husband about how we wanted to move forward with things. Lots of crying, but I did take time-outs as needed to collect myself and just be in the moment. I feel like if this had happened previously, it would have been rougher so yay for progress kinda. :cantcope:

I hope it's okay that these workout journals have kinda because a general journal. :sorry:

  • Daily Hug Challenge - Day 5 completed. Doesn't feel as awkward anymore. But also hard to tell how much it's helping.
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 26 completed
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Abs Standing - Day 16 completed
  • Hero's Journey - Day 2 attempted. Going for Option A because it looked easier to do, got 2 sets of 60 half jacks before waving a white flag. Gonna try again on Saturday, probably doing option A again. Though the jab-jab-cross-squat looks like a more fun exercise. But that karma ... I can't tell which is a better option. ;n;
  • Better Sleep - Held off
  • Balance Workout - Held off
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 5 done
    • I'm grateful we have decent savings for vet visits that weren't fully planned.
    • I'm grateful for hot showers
    • I'm grateful for such amazing partners.
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 5 done
    • Finally watched a video I've been really needing to watch. (Hey, that counts!)
  • BONUS: Might as well say in the actual exercise part about the mile walk. XD
 
Thank you @Maegaranthelas , @PetiteSheWolf @Anek and @Mamatigerj (and anyone who is reading this). Marooney got lots of fluids yesterday and today. He gets to relax until Monday when we'll see what we need to do. We were also given a couple of cans of wet food to see if he likes it and he did go after it a little, so that's a good sign. It's got gravy on it, so of course he wants at least that part, haha.

Today's Yesterday's Log (1/17/25)
Whelp, I meant to do exercises. Whoops~ In my defense, I'm driving into work and I get a text from my boss that I get a new person to orient for the shift. Well that's fun! It went really well. She thought I was a good teacher and called me "brilliant." Apparently she was surprised I've only been there for 2 months so far. Just the punch of serotonin I needed! :loveit:

But because of training with her and also a little bit of being trained (I offered to cover a tech position Monday night since we're short), I didn't really get to much time for anything. And unfortunately forgot even the easier ones. So I'll be trying again today! What little time I had to myself, I either fooled around on my phone or worked on some art stuff. I'm hoping to pop in to VRChat as well, since I haven't been able to for a few days, but I'm gonna try to time manage well enough.
 
Today's Log (1/18/25)
Today was a much better day for exercising. Got most of my stuff in. But dang it if Day 2 of Hero's Journey didn't kick my butt again. Currently a debate between trying Option B or switching to a different program for the time being until I'm ready for it.
  • Daily Hug Challenge - Day 6 completed. Doing better about remembering it in the morning.
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 27 completed. Surprised I'm nearly done already!
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Abs Standing - Day 17 and 18 completed. Back on track! :yes:
  • Hero's Journey - Day 2 attempted. Option A only got me 1 set this time. ;n;
  • Better Sleep - Held off
  • Balance Workout - Held off
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 6 done
    • I'm grateful for the mate's enjoyment of cooking that comes with actual ability to cook, haha. He made up a random noodle dish and it was tasty!
    • I'm grateful that frozen egg rolls are a thing and that we have an air fryer to cook them in.
    • I'm grateful that Marooney ate a little bit of his dinner. Well, he mostly licked at the gravy. But that's better than nothing right now.
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 6 done
    • Catching back up with Abs Standing!
    • Understanding my limitations and not hurting myself with exercise this time, trying to do more than I'm ready for.
 
Today's Log (1/19/25)
Fairly good day today. Family day with us hosting. (I'm not sure if I said or not, but we take turns hosting.) I did have to update the rest of the crew about Marooney. They were, of course, very supportive and comforting. It helped to share with them. The snacks they brought also helped, lol. We also got to play pathfinder so that was nice. Setting up for the next part of the plot.

I did decide to officially hold off on the Hero's Journey program. I think if I was just doing that one, I could do it. But right now, I'm not quite ready for it on top of the other programs (and life stressors). That was a hard decision to make, TBH. I feel like I failed. But I know it's actually a victory to recognize where I am and to now have a new goal of something to work towards. That's what I'm trying to tell myself anyways. Better to sit with this gross feeling than to push myself and end up hurting myself, I think. Trying to be compassionate to myself and all that.
  • Daily Hug Challenge - Day 7 completed
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 28 completed. Just a bit more to go!
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Abs Standing - Day 19 completed
  • Better Sleep - Completed
  • Balance Workout - Completed
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 7 completed
    • I'm grateful for the best polycule ever. <3
    • I'm grateful that the mate suggested I take a nap and that I was able to. Went down for a full cycle (hour and a half) rest. I wasn't fully asleep the whole time, but it felt so nice~ I don't think I realized how tired I was if I'm honest.
    • I'm grateful for learning about TTRPGs. They're so much fun! Especially when I'm allowed to really get into the role play side of things. <3
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 7 completed
    • Recognizing my limits with my exercising and adjusting to it. That's something I struggle with, so this is a victory, even if it doesn't feel or seem like one.
    • Got Marooney to eat a little bit over the night. He hasn't been wanting to, so that's a victory. I'll take it as it is, while trying not to think about that too much.
Gonna be up a little bit longer. Marooney has a follow-up appointment with the vet in a little bit. But bed soon~
 
Today's Log (1/20/25)
Today went pretty well all things considered. Found out Marooney is, well, not doing the best but not the worst either. His energy is perked up a bit even if his appetite hasn't. So not out of the woods yet but more hopeful than before.

Picked up a work shift last night to cover one of our RCS shifts (basically a tech). 8 hours instead of 12 so we were able to eat out before I went into work which was nice. We needed a little treat TBH. Work went smoother than I thought it would. The nurses (due to situations we had two instead of just the one) were both helpful since this was the first time trying to do the RCS role. And still should be able to get to bed a little early. Got all my exercises done except the meditation. So not too bad. Hopefully this continues for tonight and tomorrow night. :cheeky:

  • Daily Hug Challenge - Day 8 completed
  • Meditation Challenge - Missed
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Abs Standing - Day 20 completed
  • Better Sleep - Completed
  • Balance Workout - Completed
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 8 completed
    • I'm grateful for the packet of Thia Tea the mate found in the pantry that I forgot about. A nice warm drink on a cold night is amazing and it'd been a while since I had one.
    • I'm grateful that work started out late enough that we got to treat ourselves a little before hand. ^_^
    • I'm grateful that I was able to take leftovers from going out to work to have for lunch so I didn't have to stress out about it. :)
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 8 completed
    • I stumbled at one point, but did pretty dang well with the RCS shift I covered. Not going to make it a normal thing (techs do so much for not as much reward) but went pretty well and I was happy to socialize a bit. Glad I volunteered to try it out. :)
 
Maegaranthelas said:
Very glad it worked out for you :morelove:
Click to expand...

Thanks! :cutter:

Today's Log (1-21-2025)
Today was strangely busier than I thought it would be but also less busier than I thought it would be at the same time? I don't know how to describe it differently but that it was one of those days. Work went pretty smoothly though and even managed to help my coworkers out a bit. :)

One more night! Then I get to jump into vacation mode. :pow:

  • Daily Hug Challenge - Day 9 completed
  • Meditation Challenge - Day 29 completed. Almost didn't though. I got interrupted the first time I tried, and that made me stupidly antsy for the second attempt. I never know when someone will wake up and need to pee or if the other staff person will need me. But even though it was messy and I kept looking at the clock, I still got it in. ONE MORE DAY TO GO!
  • Universal Warmup - Completed
  • Abs Standing - Day 21 completed. Trying to stay on top of this!
  • Better Sleep - Completed
  • Balance Workout - Completed
  • Daily Gratitude Challenge - Day 9 completed
    • I'm grateful for the new chief at work. I didn't even eat my lunch today, I just enjoyed leftovers from his cooking. YUM!
    • I'm grateful for the blanket I store in my car for emergencies. Because I am not thankful for 6℉ weather in the morning on my way home, lol. :yellz:
    • I'm grateful that it's fairly sunny outside. Helps fight against the frost and ice.
  • Counting Victories Challenge - Day 9 completed
    • Even though I just barely got beat, I was able to figure out how to do one of the notes we do for a new admission. I don't usually do admissions, but I was trying to help out since the day nurse couldn't get to it all. (Our manager got it just before I did.)
    • Got my exercising done, even though I didn't think I'd be able to. As said, struggled with the meditation, but still got the time in technically.
 
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