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Rainbow Dragon's Lair
- Thread starter Laura Rainbow Dragon
- Start date
Maegaranthelas
Well-known member
from
Oh FFS... I have experienced a fair amount of medical incompetence, but this really does take the cake. It's making me want to use all of the swearwords, so I can't even imagine what you and your brother are going through.
Big big hugs to you
Big big hugs to you
from
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Thank you:
@Mamatigerj
@PetiteSheWolf
@graoumia
@Maegaranthelas
@Fremen
@Deadoks
But then I felt bad thinking this, because what my brother is going through is horrible.
Our mother's transfer to a facility close to my brother seems to be stalled, but is in theory still in the works. I am still hoping it will happen before he needs to make a decision on palliative care. He will not make that decision over the phone or even based on a one-day-a-week visit. If he has to make the call while she's still in the hospital far from him, he would need to stay in a hotel again to be able to see her every day for a few days. And then he'd be away from his home and family while having to deal with that.
Some clarification + further confusion:
1. The palliative care doc has not said definitively our mother should be on palliative care at this time. He has said we should definitely be thinking about it as a possibility for the near future. He will be assessing her over the course of this week and--we think--making a recommendation at the end of the week.
2. An internist saw our mother on Friday evening while my brother was there and said her salt levels were fine at that time. So I do not understand why the PC doc said the issue with her consciousness level was caused by hypernatremia.
3. The neuro adjusted her shunt again on the weekend, and her consciousness level did improve some after that. So clearly (at least it seems clear to me, because every period of improvement we have seen has followed adjustments to the shunt) intracranial pressure is at least partially the problem. I do not know what the standard expectations of a cerebral shunt are. Is it normal for them to need this much adjusting? Or is the ongoing difficulty with getting/maintaining our mother's intracranial pressure at a good level an indication that her problems are too complex to be solved with the shunt? I don't know.
4. One of the palliative care doc's concerns is that if a person relies on IV hydration for too long their body will acclimate to this assistance and they'll then never be able to transition off of it. Our mother has had the IV for eight weeks continuously now. I am wondering if this level of acclimatization has perhaps already occurred. (Again: I don't know. But our mother is 82 years old. And 8 weeks is a long time for these circumstances.)
5. My brother thinks there is an issue with hospital politics/regulations that prevents certain hospital personnel from disagreeing with certain other hospital personnel. Also: he got the impression last weekend that the palliative care doc was not allowed to get involved unless my brother explicitly requested that he get involved. (My brother had previously and multiple times, dating back at least three weeks, said he was fine with palliative care being involved, that he would be happy to talk to them, etc. But he got the impression this weekend that the nurse practitioner was attempting to lead him into explicitly requesting their involvement. So he did. And two days later the PC doc called him.)
6. I found out about something that is stressing my brother out (that is not as much of a concern to me, but that he is clearly very worried about). When we were small children, our paternal grandfather lost a leg to gangrene. Our grandfather still lived in England at that time. But we had already moved to Canada. So we weren't around for that going down. Our paternal grandparents moved to Canada soon afterward, and lived with us for a time. But our parents prepared us to receive a one-legged grandfather into our lives by minimizing the horror of what had happened to him and talking up how much of a hero he was to have adapted so well to his new circumstances. (We were told he had even been on television in England to showcase how awesome he was for having learned to walk again after having had a stroke and losing a leg at the same time.) Something I did not know (which I just found out from my brother this morning, and I'm not sure he knew about either until discussing our mother's current situation with our uncle) is that it was our uncle who had to authorize the amputation of our grandfather's leg. Our grandfather was still way too out of it from his stroke. And I think our grandmother was possibly too sick at the time as well. So our grandfather awoke from surgery not understanding why he was missing a leg. And he spent a couple of weeks after that "retreating from reality into a delirious state" to avoid facing what had happened to him. My brother is clearly concerned this could happen to our mother if she ever regains enough lucidity to understand what has happened to her. I am thinking the nature of our mother's injury has a protective effect from this outcome. Our grandfather woke up to a missing leg that was never going to grow back. But our mother currently is not capable of understanding what has happened to her. The only way she could gain the ability to understand is if she improves substantially from her current condition. So it seems impossible for her to ever have comprehension of things being as bad for her as they are right now. At least I hope this is the case.
@Mamatigerj
@PetiteSheWolf
@graoumia
@Maegaranthelas
@Fremen
@Deadoks
I did think it is a good thing my brother is the point of contact and not me. Because I would have had a hard time refraining from saying socially inappropriate things.
But then I felt bad thinking this, because what my brother is going through is horrible.
Our mother's transfer to a facility close to my brother seems to be stalled, but is in theory still in the works. I am still hoping it will happen before he needs to make a decision on palliative care. He will not make that decision over the phone or even based on a one-day-a-week visit. If he has to make the call while she's still in the hospital far from him, he would need to stay in a hotel again to be able to see her every day for a few days. And then he'd be away from his home and family while having to deal with that.
Some clarification + further confusion:
1. The palliative care doc has not said definitively our mother should be on palliative care at this time. He has said we should definitely be thinking about it as a possibility for the near future. He will be assessing her over the course of this week and--we think--making a recommendation at the end of the week.
2. An internist saw our mother on Friday evening while my brother was there and said her salt levels were fine at that time. So I do not understand why the PC doc said the issue with her consciousness level was caused by hypernatremia.
3. The neuro adjusted her shunt again on the weekend, and her consciousness level did improve some after that. So clearly (at least it seems clear to me, because every period of improvement we have seen has followed adjustments to the shunt) intracranial pressure is at least partially the problem. I do not know what the standard expectations of a cerebral shunt are. Is it normal for them to need this much adjusting? Or is the ongoing difficulty with getting/maintaining our mother's intracranial pressure at a good level an indication that her problems are too complex to be solved with the shunt? I don't know.
4. One of the palliative care doc's concerns is that if a person relies on IV hydration for too long their body will acclimate to this assistance and they'll then never be able to transition off of it. Our mother has had the IV for eight weeks continuously now. I am wondering if this level of acclimatization has perhaps already occurred. (Again: I don't know. But our mother is 82 years old. And 8 weeks is a long time for these circumstances.)
5. My brother thinks there is an issue with hospital politics/regulations that prevents certain hospital personnel from disagreeing with certain other hospital personnel. Also: he got the impression last weekend that the palliative care doc was not allowed to get involved unless my brother explicitly requested that he get involved. (My brother had previously and multiple times, dating back at least three weeks, said he was fine with palliative care being involved, that he would be happy to talk to them, etc. But he got the impression this weekend that the nurse practitioner was attempting to lead him into explicitly requesting their involvement. So he did. And two days later the PC doc called him.)
6. I found out about something that is stressing my brother out (that is not as much of a concern to me, but that he is clearly very worried about). When we were small children, our paternal grandfather lost a leg to gangrene. Our grandfather still lived in England at that time. But we had already moved to Canada. So we weren't around for that going down. Our paternal grandparents moved to Canada soon afterward, and lived with us for a time. But our parents prepared us to receive a one-legged grandfather into our lives by minimizing the horror of what had happened to him and talking up how much of a hero he was to have adapted so well to his new circumstances. (We were told he had even been on television in England to showcase how awesome he was for having learned to walk again after having had a stroke and losing a leg at the same time.) Something I did not know (which I just found out from my brother this morning, and I'm not sure he knew about either until discussing our mother's current situation with our uncle) is that it was our uncle who had to authorize the amputation of our grandfather's leg. Our grandfather was still way too out of it from his stroke. And I think our grandmother was possibly too sick at the time as well. So our grandfather awoke from surgery not understanding why he was missing a leg. And he spent a couple of weeks after that "retreating from reality into a delirious state" to avoid facing what had happened to him. My brother is clearly concerned this could happen to our mother if she ever regains enough lucidity to understand what has happened to her. I am thinking the nature of our mother's injury has a protective effect from this outcome. Our grandfather woke up to a missing leg that was never going to grow back. But our mother currently is not capable of understanding what has happened to her. The only way she could gain the ability to understand is if she improves substantially from her current condition. So it seems impossible for her to ever have comprehension of things being as bad for her as they are right now. At least I hope this is the case.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 5:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: another day off here too -- could not face push-ups
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: nope
hiking: 7 km with Shelby, 1.5 km errands
After reading my brother's email, I was too mentally drained to face any of the hard stuff.
writing: vaguely thinking that I should write something, but brain was too
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 17,308
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 915
consumable YTD: 38,025
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 72,864
deficit: 34,839
I really need to learn to do my writing first. I could not concentrate on it after receiving the latest news re: my mother.
I did at least bake bread on this day. I have been struggling for my last several bread-making projects with an old container of honey that has crystalized. The container is plastic, so heating up the honey to reliquify it has been challenging. But when I reorganized the pantry I discovered a one litre Mason jar that is full of honey my father purchased once upon a time (more than 20 years ago) from some guy he knew who was a beekeeper. The honey is very dark and strong-tasting but still liquid. My yeast loved it, and it made delicious bread.
Also: I picked up the mail, then dealt with the special project I received, and then added an extra kilometre to Shelby's walk to take the special project back to a mailbox to mail it.
French: Netflix, Netflix, more Netflix
Since I wasn't able to concentrate on anything else, I watched 3 episodes of a French-Canadian medical drama.
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 93 (It was a very wimpy "workout". But I did something. Under the circumstances, I'm allowing it.)
Consecutive days of French study: 1175
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 12
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: another day off here too -- could not face push-ups
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: nope
hiking: 7 km with Shelby, 1.5 km errands
After reading my brother's email, I was too mentally drained to face any of the hard stuff.
writing: vaguely thinking that I should write something, but brain was too
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 17,308
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 915
consumable YTD: 38,025
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 72,864
deficit: 34,839
I really need to learn to do my writing first. I could not concentrate on it after receiving the latest news re: my mother.
I did at least bake bread on this day. I have been struggling for my last several bread-making projects with an old container of honey that has crystalized. The container is plastic, so heating up the honey to reliquify it has been challenging. But when I reorganized the pantry I discovered a one litre Mason jar that is full of honey my father purchased once upon a time (more than 20 years ago) from some guy he knew who was a beekeeper. The honey is very dark and strong-tasting but still liquid. My yeast loved it, and it made delicious bread.
Also: I picked up the mail, then dealt with the special project I received, and then added an extra kilometre to Shelby's walk to take the special project back to a mailbox to mail it.
French: Netflix, Netflix, more Netflix
Since I wasn't able to concentrate on anything else, I watched 3 episodes of a French-Canadian medical drama.
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 93 (It was a very wimpy "workout". But I did something. Under the circumstances, I'm allowing it.)
Consecutive days of French study: 1175
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 12
MadamMeow
Well-known member
Fae
from
Central NJ
Posts: 754
from
Central NJ
Posts: 754
"I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time, but Im too young to worry..."
In the US, the Healthcare system is still a business so it is very hard to trust doctors although most people always do.
I don't believe this should be the same where you are so I don't understand either.
Really sorry your family is going through this. Hopefully they have better staff after they finally move her.
I don't believe this should be the same where you are so I don't understand either.
Really sorry your family is going through this. Hopefully they have better staff after they finally move her.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Thank you @MadamMeow .
Here, our healthcare system is overburdened. All of these people providing care to my mother have more patients than they want and are likely working more hours than they want. There is no lack of trust for ethical reasons. But certainly we cannot just trust what anyone says, because they just don't know. And we don't know. We don't know what our mother would want in her current situation. (We can make an educated guess. But we don't know. And she isn't able to tell us.) We don't know how much recovery she could potentially make. Nobody does.
Doctors aren't perfect. They're not infallible. They don't know everything. They're just humans, like the rest of us, trying to do the best they can with the resources they have available to them. The neurosurgeon seeks neurosurgical solutions, because that is what he knows. The internist seeks internal medicine solutions, because that is what he knows. The palliative care doctor seeks palliative solutions because that is what he knows. And patients and their families get caught in the middle.
It is very possible (likely even) that our mother has not been moved closer to my brother yet because there are no hospital beds available in his area.
The entire system is overburdened and under-resourced because we have single-payer healthcare, and most people have been taught to hate paying taxes. The only way to fix the problems is to increase taxation. And politicians who want to do that generally cannot get elected. So instead we elect governments who promise to make the system "more efficient" by changing the organizational system through which healthcare is delivered (which has happened twice now in recent years and made healthcare delivery worse each time) or worse: we elect governments like the current one in Ontario who outright promised they were going to make cuts to healthcare (but hey: they also promised to reduce the tax on beer! So...)
Here, our healthcare system is overburdened. All of these people providing care to my mother have more patients than they want and are likely working more hours than they want. There is no lack of trust for ethical reasons. But certainly we cannot just trust what anyone says, because they just don't know. And we don't know. We don't know what our mother would want in her current situation. (We can make an educated guess. But we don't know. And she isn't able to tell us.) We don't know how much recovery she could potentially make. Nobody does.
Doctors aren't perfect. They're not infallible. They don't know everything. They're just humans, like the rest of us, trying to do the best they can with the resources they have available to them. The neurosurgeon seeks neurosurgical solutions, because that is what he knows. The internist seeks internal medicine solutions, because that is what he knows. The palliative care doctor seeks palliative solutions because that is what he knows. And patients and their families get caught in the middle.
It is very possible (likely even) that our mother has not been moved closer to my brother yet because there are no hospital beds available in his area.
The entire system is overburdened and under-resourced because we have single-payer healthcare, and most people have been taught to hate paying taxes. The only way to fix the problems is to increase taxation. And politicians who want to do that generally cannot get elected. So instead we elect governments who promise to make the system "more efficient" by changing the organizational system through which healthcare is delivered (which has happened twice now in recent years and made healthcare delivery worse each time) or worse: we elect governments like the current one in Ontario who outright promised they were going to make cuts to healthcare (but hey: they also promised to reduce the tax on beer! So...)
Syrius
Well-known member
Valkyrie
from
The Sonoran Desert
Pronouns: she/her
Posts: 623
from
The Sonoran Desert
Pronouns: she/her
Posts: 623
"Energy and persistence conquers all things. -Benjamin Franklin"
FFS. This is mirrors a lot of what we were going through with M's dad's care team. It would be so much better if they would just talk to each other. I hope everything improves and I am so very sorry that you are going through this. 
Lady Celerity
Well-known member
from
The Woods. NorCal
Posts: 684
"..one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on.."
I am so sorry that you are going through this. Sending prayers.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Thank you @CODawn & @Syrius & @Lady Celerity .
@Syrius I am sorry your family too had to deal with this same lack of communication problem. Of all the truly complex issues medical care teams need to deal with on a daily basis, one would think figuring out they should just talk to one another and get their story straight before speaking with patients and their families would be an easy issue to solve.
At this point nobody knows why our mother's consciousness level is as low as it is. Somebody at some point in time thought hypernatremia was a plausible explanation. But as per the internist's assessment last Friday, it's not that. Shunt malfunction is also a possibility. But they have not been able to diagnose a shunt malfunction at this point. The shuntogram last week showed the shunt was functioning as it should. But the results of that test may not be definitive. Now our mother is to have another spinal tap--possibly tonight--which reportedly will give a definitive answer as to whether or not the shunt is working.
I am hoping that the family meeting with the palliative care doc to discuss goals of care (that we had thought was going to happen three weeks ago) will now be happening on Monday. I am hoping also to have heard from the neurosurgeon re: the functionality of the shunt and his recommended next steps before that meeting. (I don't know at this point if I will be conferenced into that call or if I'll get the information second-hand from my brother. But I am hopeful that my brother at least will have spoken with the neuro prior to the Monday meeting with PC.)
@Syrius I am sorry your family too had to deal with this same lack of communication problem. Of all the truly complex issues medical care teams need to deal with on a daily basis, one would think figuring out they should just talk to one another and get their story straight before speaking with patients and their families would be an easy issue to solve.
At this point nobody knows why our mother's consciousness level is as low as it is. Somebody at some point in time thought hypernatremia was a plausible explanation. But as per the internist's assessment last Friday, it's not that. Shunt malfunction is also a possibility. But they have not been able to diagnose a shunt malfunction at this point. The shuntogram last week showed the shunt was functioning as it should. But the results of that test may not be definitive. Now our mother is to have another spinal tap--possibly tonight--which reportedly will give a definitive answer as to whether or not the shunt is working.
I am hoping that the family meeting with the palliative care doc to discuss goals of care (that we had thought was going to happen three weeks ago) will now be happening on Monday. I am hoping also to have heard from the neurosurgeon re: the functionality of the shunt and his recommended next steps before that meeting. (I don't know at this point if I will be conferenced into that call or if I'll get the information second-hand from my brother. But I am hopeful that my brother at least will have spoken with the neuro prior to the Monday meeting with PC.)
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 6:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: another day off
Ankle Recovery: 2 x DP, calf raises one-legged
Talk to the Hand: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
writing: work on short story
new fiction words: 846
fiction YTD: 18,154
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 2492
consumable YTD: 40,517
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 74,888
deficit: 34,371
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 94
Consecutive days of French study: 1176
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 13
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: another day off
Ankle Recovery: 2 x DP, calf raises one-legged
Talk to the Hand: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
writing: work on short story
new fiction words: 846
fiction YTD: 18,154
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 2492
consumable YTD: 40,517
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 74,888
deficit: 34,371
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 94
Consecutive days of French study: 1176
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 13
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 7:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: another day off
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
I'm not sure what's happening with 60 Days of HIIT or Power Hold at this point. I want to keep up with Power Hold. But I still find it a challenge to force myself to do the push-ups days. For 60DoH I am still stuck on a cardio day. I've never enjoyed this type of stationary cardio exercise. I'd one thousand times rather just go for a run. So when I do go for a run, I think: well, I don't need to do stationary cardio because I already went for a run. And when I don't go for a run because I'm either too tired or don't have the time, well then I definitely feel too tired or don't want to make the time to do a type of exercise I like so much less. This being winter in my cell of the Hive, I was thinking there would be more days I wouldn't run due to unfavourable weather. But the weather has been pretty good for running the past couple of weeks.
writing: craft study
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 18,154
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 0
consumable YTD: 40,517
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 76,912
deficit: 36,395
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 95
Consecutive days of French study: 1177
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 14
I made pizza this day, which is time-consuming but yummy. Did not have all of the topping ingredients I normally include, but it was still yummy. (And now I have leftover pizza for several days.
And the pizza that got the last of the sun-dried tomatoes and the last of the fresh pineapple I am saving for last. )
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: another day off
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
I'm not sure what's happening with 60 Days of HIIT or Power Hold at this point. I want to keep up with Power Hold. But I still find it a challenge to force myself to do the push-ups days. For 60DoH I am still stuck on a cardio day. I've never enjoyed this type of stationary cardio exercise. I'd one thousand times rather just go for a run. So when I do go for a run, I think: well, I don't need to do stationary cardio because I already went for a run. And when I don't go for a run because I'm either too tired or don't have the time, well then I definitely feel too tired or don't want to make the time to do a type of exercise I like so much less. This being winter in my cell of the Hive, I was thinking there would be more days I wouldn't run due to unfavourable weather. But the weather has been pretty good for running the past couple of weeks.
writing: craft study
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 18,154
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 0
consumable YTD: 40,517
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 76,912
deficit: 36,395
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 95
Consecutive days of French study: 1177
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 14
I made pizza this day, which is time-consuming but yummy. Did not have all of the topping ingredients I normally include, but it was still yummy. (And now I have leftover pizza for several days.
And the pizza that got the last of the sun-dried tomatoes and the last of the fresh pineapple I am saving for last. )
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 8:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day 18 (15, 7, 7)
Ankle Recovery: 2 x DP, calf raises one-legged
Talk to the Hand: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
Temperature actually hit double digits today!
writing: craft study
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 18,154
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 774
consumable YTD: 41,291
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 78,936
deficit: 37,645
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 96
Consecutive days of French study: 1178
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 15
The hospital did the spinal tap to test my mother's shunt last night. Then the neuro called my brother and said, "Good news!" the shunt is working properly. Yeah for the shunt, I guess? But we don't see how that news is actually good for our mother. Her level of consciousness is poor. If the shunt was the problem, the shunt could be repaired. The shunt not being the problem means we don't know what is causing the problem, which means there is still no known way to treat it.
My brother tried to press the neuro for additional information. But this was all on a phone call at ten o'clock at night, which the neuro clearly did not want to extend into a long conversation. So we are left with more questions and more waiting.
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day 18 (15, 7, 7)
Ankle Recovery: 2 x DP, calf raises one-legged
Talk to the Hand: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
Temperature actually hit double digits today!
writing: craft study
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 18,154
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 774
consumable YTD: 41,291
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 78,936
deficit: 37,645
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 96
Consecutive days of French study: 1178
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 15
The hospital did the spinal tap to test my mother's shunt last night. Then the neuro called my brother and said, "Good news!" the shunt is working properly. Yeah for the shunt, I guess? But we don't see how that news is actually good for our mother. Her level of consciousness is poor. If the shunt was the problem, the shunt could be repaired. The shunt not being the problem means we don't know what is causing the problem, which means there is still no known way to treat it.
My brother tried to press the neuro for additional information. But this was all on a phone call at ten o'clock at night, which the neuro clearly did not want to extend into a long conversation. So we are left with more questions and more waiting.
Today is friday and friday is home made pizza at home, , what kind of ingredients do you use ?, for my family most of the time it is mainly cheese. I like tunaI made pizza this day, which is time-consuming but yummy. Did not have all of the topping ingredients I normally include, but it was still yummy. (And now I have leftover pizza for several days.
I can see you are having big reflections about your program, sometimes it is not a good moment not being able to know what to do, but once you will decide, you will certainly feel better.
Take care and make a big kiss to Shelby for me
Sorry for this situation
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
This is my pizza how I usually make it:
Before cooking:
and after cooking:
It is a 100% whole wheat crust:
3.5 cups whole wheat flour
1 tablespoon quick rise yeast
1 teaspoon salt
1.5 cups hot tap water
1 tablespoon honey
Combine dry ingredients. Then mix in hot water and honey. Knead for 10 minutes. Cover and place in warm location (I use my oven with the oven light on) for an hour.
After dough has risen: divide into four portions. Shape each one and spread onto greased pizza trays. Brush extra virgin olive oil on top of each pizza crust. Put back into the warm place to rise again while preparing topping ingredients.
For toppings I start with a layer of tomato sauce. (I use a store-bought sauce for this. I use this one, which is nice and thick and has good flavour--although to me it is not "hot" at all.) Then I add a layer of fresh spinach leaves. Then the cheeses: grated part-skim mozzarella, 4-year-old cheddar, and habanero jack with cracked black pepper. Then I pile on the additional toppings:
oven-roasted chicken breast
onions
shiitake mushrooms
fresh pineapple
pickled hot banana pepper rings
sun-dried tomatoes
anchovies
feta cheese
Bake at 425F for 20 minutes. Then enjoy! (Convincing myself it is healthy because: Hey! It's 100% whole grain. And I put a generous layer of spinach on there!)
Sadly this week I did not have any spinach, mushrooms, or anchovies, and only enough fresh pineapple and sun-dried tomatoes for one pizza. (I put tinned pineapple on the other three though.) I had a half can of sauce and a half package of mozzarella already open though, which I did not want to go mouldy on me, plus a partial fresh pineapple that was also not long for this world. So I decided to make the pizzas with what I had. They were still good. Just not as decadent as usual.
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Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
I am not worried about it. The fact that I have been able to get outside and run most days is a good thing! And I have been doing the push-ups often enough that I am at least maintaining my ability to do 15 in one set. I might put 60DoH aside for now. Or I might keep up with it. I haven't decided yet. The weather here for March and the remainder of February and even into April could all be quite nice for running or it could be miserable. It will be what it will be, and so long as I am doing something to keep active, I will be happy with that.
Because of the situation with my mother's health, and my own precarious housing situation, now is not a good time for me to try to be too regimented with my workouts (or anything else). So I'm keeping up with doing something on the workout front every day, and with writing a short story every week, and doing something to maintain my French (even if that's just watching Netflix shows with a French language track at the moment), and deciding that if I accomplish these three things I will call that good enough for now.
Thank you.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
My mother has finally been accepted as a patient by a doctor in the city where my brother lives!
Now we must wait for a bed to open up there.
Now we must wait for a bed to open up there.
Mianevem
Well-known member
Finally some good news!
Nevetharine
Well-known member
Good News 
Anek
Well-known member
Sorceress
from
Bavaria, Germany
Pronouns: She/her
Posts: 2,304
from
Bavaria, Germany
Pronouns: She/her
Posts: 2,304
"If the time should come when you have to make a choice between what is right and what is easy, remember Cedric Diggory."
Great to hear!
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Thank you:
@Mianevem
@graoumia
@Nevetharine
@Fremen
@Anek
@CODawn
There is still no word on a bed for my mother. Her NP in the current hospital had hoped her transfer might happen this weekend (or at least had prepared instructions for the weekend staff in the event that it might). But there's been no word on a move thus far. My brother knows someone who works in the hospital system she is to be moved to, who described the situation there as "gridlock". So it could take a while to find a bed for her there. It's just one of those situation where all we can do is wait. It will happen when it happens, and things should move quickly at that time. In the meantime, at least we know now that the hospital transfer system has accepted that our mother needs to be moved to the region we want her in.
@Mianevem
@graoumia
@Nevetharine
@Fremen
@Anek
@CODawn
There is still no word on a bed for my mother. Her NP in the current hospital had hoped her transfer might happen this weekend (or at least had prepared instructions for the weekend staff in the event that it might). But there's been no word on a move thus far. My brother knows someone who works in the hospital system she is to be moved to, who described the situation there as "gridlock". So it could take a while to find a bed for her there. It's just one of those situation where all we can do is wait. It will happen when it happens, and things should move quickly at that time. In the meantime, at least we know now that the hospital transfer system has accepted that our mother needs to be moved to the region we want her in.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 9:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
More double digit temperatures!
writing: craft study, business webinar
new fiction words: 13
fiction YTD: 18,167
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 1178
consumable YTD: 42,469
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 80,960
deficit: 38,491
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 97
Consecutive days of French study: 1179
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 16
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
More double digit temperatures!
writing: craft study, business webinar
new fiction words: 13
fiction YTD: 18,167
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 1178
consumable YTD: 42,469
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 80,960
deficit: 38,491
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 97
Consecutive days of French study: 1179
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 16
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 10:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day 19
Ankle Recovery: 2 x DP, calf raises one-legged
Talk to the Hand: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
knee-to-elbows for @MadamMeow 's birthday
running: 5 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby, 1.5 km errands
A little bit cooler this day, but still sunny. Played Shelby's shining light game with her in the back yard for a bit even. We tried to get out early enough for our walk to meet up with Shelby's friends in the park, but they had all gone early. We saw just Stella and Toby as they were leaving.
Still: we had a nice walk together. (When we don't see any of Shelby's friends on our walk, I tell her, "Nevermind, Shelby. You're my favourite person to go for a walk with anyway."
writing: craft study, business webinar
new fiction words: 598
fiction YTD: 18,765
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 598
consumable YTD: 43,067
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 82,984
deficit: 39,917
The story I started on at the beginning of the week was progressing far too slowly. There was too much stuff I needed to research for it to make it the story I want and finish it this week. So I started on a completely different story this day.
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 98
Consecutive days of French study: 1180
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 17
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day 19
Ankle Recovery: 2 x DP, calf raises one-legged
Talk to the Hand: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
knee-to-elbows for @MadamMeow 's birthday
running: 5 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby, 1.5 km errands
A little bit cooler this day, but still sunny. Played Shelby's shining light game with her in the back yard for a bit even. We tried to get out early enough for our walk to meet up with Shelby's friends in the park, but they had all gone early. We saw just Stella and Toby as they were leaving.
Still: we had a nice walk together. (When we don't see any of Shelby's friends on our walk, I tell her, "Nevermind, Shelby. You're my favourite person to go for a walk with anyway." writing: craft study, business webinar
new fiction words: 598
fiction YTD: 18,765
story-a-week challenge: 3 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 3 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 598
consumable YTD: 43,067
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 82,984
deficit: 39,917
The story I started on at the beginning of the week was progressing far too slowly. There was too much stuff I needed to research for it to make it the story I want and finish it this week. So I started on a completely different story this day.
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 98
Consecutive days of French study: 1180
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 17
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Thank you @graoumia .
February 11:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
running: 3 km
hiking: 9 km with Shelby & friends
A bit colder again this day, but still not bad for February. Shelby and I got started half an hour earlier than on Saturday, in the hope we'd get to see the whole gang in the park. Then we got waylaid by a neighbour.
Shelby's kitty friend Buddy had been sitting with the guy who lives next door to the lady who's been looking after Buddy. When Buddy came out to the road to see Shelby, the human followed him. This is not a human I am particularly fond of, for various reasons. One of which being that he regularly bitches about having to pay taxes. But then he also bitches about our social services not being greater than they are.
I said to him, "You do realize that the one pays for the other, right?"
He responded by going on a tear about how, after he's paid his mortgage, paid all of his utility bills, bought groceries, bought new clothes for himself and his children, paid for their extracurriculars, put gas in his multiple cars and paid for their insurance and upkeep, taken a vacation, replaced all of his aging technology, and contributed to his retirement fund, there's no money left from his paycheque because the mean ol' tax man took everything else.
He did not appreciate my asking him WTELF he needed more money for if he could afford to finance all of that.
Unfortunately, this guy is also so lonely that every time he sees me he manages to forget all of the times I have given him my not-at-all-humble opinion that his complaints are stupid, and he tries to act as if we are the best of buds. He is also an alcoholic, and I suspect his brain is quite addled from all of the alcohol at this point. He is younger than me. But he comes across as very confused most of the time. On this day he tried to tell me about what a great neighbour he has been to the lady next door (the one who feeds Buddy) because he's been mowing her lawn for her since she got sick. Only trouble with this claim is that this lady only became ill a month ago, and nobody cuts grass in Ontario in January!
Eventually I just cut him off, saying, "We have to go," and then just walked away with Shelby.
When we finally made it to the park where all the puppies gather, there was no one else there.
I was afraid we had wasted too much time being talked at by our neighbour and missed the gathering. But then, just as we were nearing the woodlot at the back of the park, Shelby's best puppy friend Hendrix showed up with his human. (They live on that side of the park and so enter via a back path, whereas Shelby and I enter from the road in front of the school.) We had not seen Hendrix or his human since before my birthday. So that was a happy re-union. We walked 3 extra kilometres (doing laps of the Fit Park trail across the road from the school) to walk with them for a bit. At one point Hendrix decided to play a rebellious teenager role. This made Shelby especially happy because she LOVES to show everyone that she is the GOOD DOG in comparison to other naughty dogs.
This was once again a yoga day in which I didn't do any yoga. When the weather is nice enough for running in February, I feel that I should take advantage of that. So I did. And then I ended up not having time to do anything else. (I perhaps should also be trying to take advantage of the fact that I currently have lots of space in which to practice yoga. And this is unlikely to be the case by the end of the year. I don't know. With the running, I know it's something I'll always be able to come back to. Sure, the weather may be unfavourable for a few days, even a few weeks at times. But bad weather never lasts. And the more I take advantage of the good weather to get out for a run when I can, the better conditioning base I'm able to maintain, making it easier for me to return to running after each period in which the weather forces a break. But I could potentially be moving into a multiple years long period of not having enough space in which to practice yoga soon. Part of me doesn't want to have a regular yoga practice now, so that won't become yet another thing I'll have to give up, another thing I'll miss, when I lose my current home.)
writing: short story
new fiction words: 1831
fiction YTD: 20,596
story-a-week challenge: 4 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 4 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 2384
consumable YTD: 45,451
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 85,008
deficit: 39,557
So I got my story done, and submitted with 3 hours and 17 minutes to spare. Not awesome. But at least I still made it to bed before midnight.
The story ended up being not at all what I had intended at the outset. (As in: I had meant to write a dark fantasy story. But I ended up writing a science fiction story with androids and FTL travel with a humanity-learns-to-become-one-with-nature type happy ending. Maybe I just don't have enough angst to write dark?) Also: I think it is more of an exploration of something I want to tackle in a significantly longer form, not something I'd want to release as it stands now. But this is okay. I got words written and a story done, and that's what mattered for this day.
I did manage to reduce my word count deficit slightly on this day. But my count for the week overall was still too short. (And for the past two weeks now has been less than what I managed the final week of January.) So I need to pull up my socks here. I did at least invest more time into research and craft study this week. So that's a win. I'm definitely still experiencing resistance to getting my BICHOK and just getting started though. Even though I like the writing once I'm in the middle of it. I really think I need to commit to getting my writing (or at least a good chunk of it) done first every morning, before other things have a chance to move in and distract me. (Of course this requires me to actually have a plan for what I'm going to write the next morning when I go to bed the night before, instead of being up late trying to finish up that day's/week's work. Or else just start writing cold on Monday mornings and accept that my dark fantasies will keep turning into happy-ending SF ecopunk.)
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 99
Consecutive days of French study: 1181
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 18
February 11:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
running: 3 km
hiking: 9 km with Shelby & friends
A bit colder again this day, but still not bad for February. Shelby and I got started half an hour earlier than on Saturday, in the hope we'd get to see the whole gang in the park. Then we got waylaid by a neighbour.
Shelby's kitty friend Buddy had been sitting with the guy who lives next door to the lady who's been looking after Buddy. When Buddy came out to the road to see Shelby, the human followed him. This is not a human I am particularly fond of, for various reasons. One of which being that he regularly bitches about having to pay taxes. But then he also bitches about our social services not being greater than they are.
I said to him, "You do realize that the one pays for the other, right?"
He responded by going on a tear about how, after he's paid his mortgage, paid all of his utility bills, bought groceries, bought new clothes for himself and his children, paid for their extracurriculars, put gas in his multiple cars and paid for their insurance and upkeep, taken a vacation, replaced all of his aging technology, and contributed to his retirement fund, there's no money left from his paycheque because the mean ol' tax man took everything else.
He did not appreciate my asking him WTELF he needed more money for if he could afford to finance all of that.
Unfortunately, this guy is also so lonely that every time he sees me he manages to forget all of the times I have given him my not-at-all-humble opinion that his complaints are stupid, and he tries to act as if we are the best of buds. He is also an alcoholic, and I suspect his brain is quite addled from all of the alcohol at this point. He is younger than me. But he comes across as very confused most of the time. On this day he tried to tell me about what a great neighbour he has been to the lady next door (the one who feeds Buddy) because he's been mowing her lawn for her since she got sick. Only trouble with this claim is that this lady only became ill a month ago, and nobody cuts grass in Ontario in January!
Eventually I just cut him off, saying, "We have to go," and then just walked away with Shelby.
When we finally made it to the park where all the puppies gather, there was no one else there.
I was afraid we had wasted too much time being talked at by our neighbour and missed the gathering. But then, just as we were nearing the woodlot at the back of the park, Shelby's best puppy friend Hendrix showed up with his human. (They live on that side of the park and so enter via a back path, whereas Shelby and I enter from the road in front of the school.) We had not seen Hendrix or his human since before my birthday. So that was a happy re-union. We walked 3 extra kilometres (doing laps of the Fit Park trail across the road from the school) to walk with them for a bit. At one point Hendrix decided to play a rebellious teenager role. This made Shelby especially happy because she LOVES to show everyone that she is the GOOD DOG in comparison to other naughty dogs.
This was once again a yoga day in which I didn't do any yoga. When the weather is nice enough for running in February, I feel that I should take advantage of that. So I did. And then I ended up not having time to do anything else. (I perhaps should also be trying to take advantage of the fact that I currently have lots of space in which to practice yoga. And this is unlikely to be the case by the end of the year. I don't know. With the running, I know it's something I'll always be able to come back to. Sure, the weather may be unfavourable for a few days, even a few weeks at times. But bad weather never lasts. And the more I take advantage of the good weather to get out for a run when I can, the better conditioning base I'm able to maintain, making it easier for me to return to running after each period in which the weather forces a break. But I could potentially be moving into a multiple years long period of not having enough space in which to practice yoga soon. Part of me doesn't want to have a regular yoga practice now, so that won't become yet another thing I'll have to give up, another thing I'll miss, when I lose my current home.)
writing: short story
new fiction words: 1831
fiction YTD: 20,596
story-a-week challenge: 4 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 4 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 2384
consumable YTD: 45,451
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 85,008
deficit: 39,557
So I got my story done, and submitted with 3 hours and 17 minutes to spare. Not awesome. But at least I still made it to bed before midnight.
The story ended up being not at all what I had intended at the outset. (As in: I had meant to write a dark fantasy story. But I ended up writing a science fiction story with androids and FTL travel with a humanity-learns-to-become-one-with-nature type happy ending. Maybe I just don't have enough angst to write dark?) Also: I think it is more of an exploration of something I want to tackle in a significantly longer form, not something I'd want to release as it stands now. But this is okay. I got words written and a story done, and that's what mattered for this day.
I did manage to reduce my word count deficit slightly on this day. But my count for the week overall was still too short. (And for the past two weeks now has been less than what I managed the final week of January.) So I need to pull up my socks here. I did at least invest more time into research and craft study this week. So that's a win. I'm definitely still experiencing resistance to getting my BICHOK and just getting started though. Even though I like the writing once I'm in the middle of it. I really think I need to commit to getting my writing (or at least a good chunk of it) done first every morning, before other things have a chance to move in and distract me. (Of course this requires me to actually have a plan for what I'm going to write the next morning when I go to bed the night before, instead of being up late trying to finish up that day's/week's work. Or else just start writing cold on Monday mornings and accept that my dark fantasies will keep turning into happy-ending SF ecopunk.)
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 99
Consecutive days of French study: 1181
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 18
Maegaranthelas
Well-known member
The world could always do with more happy solarpunk 
Hello @Laura Rainbow Dragon , just a thought for you, hope you are allright!
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
I agree!The world could always do with more happy solarpunk
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Thank you. I did. And Shelby and I had a good walk once we escaped him.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Yup. All good here. Still waiting for a bed to open up for my mother close to my brother. And am frustrated with a process that was meant to simplify my banking but has thus far only caused me hassle. But we will get there.Hello @Laura Rainbow Dragon , just a thought for you, hope you are allright!
Public Service Announcement:
People: If you decide to procreate, please, please, PLEASE address your kids by their first name! Seriously. If it is your job to decide what name goes on the birth certificate of some puking, slobbering, pooping, wailing pile of human flesh that just showed up in the world, the first name--the FIRST name--you put on that flipping birth certificate needs to be the name by which you are going to address the kid. (If your kid later decides they like their middle name better and they want to burden themselves with all the hassles of having the name they are commonly addressed by not being their legal first name, fine. That is on them. But do not, I am begging you, do NOT force that burden onto them at birth.) Trust me: whatever excuse you think you have for calling your kid by their middle name, it is not a good one. Do not do it!
I am 53 years old and STILL being hassled by crap that I would not have to deal with if my parents had only had the common sense and courtesy to list "Laura" as my first name on my birth certificate! (And now I cannot even yell at them for screwing me over in this regard anymore.)
Today's problem? I set up some new banking accounts recently. At the time I set them up, I explicitly told the bank manager who input the data for me I wanted the accounts registered to my full legal name. I told him what that name is. (There shouldn't have been any doubt as I already have accounts at this bank that date back decades, and they're registered under my full legal name. But just so there was no room for error--or so I thought--I told him at the time of account setup exactly what my full legal name is.) I told him, "I always use my full legal name for banking. Never anything else."
And now today I tried to setup online banking for these new accounts. And I cannot do it. Because setting up access requires me to digitally sign user agreements that already have my name filled out in them--and the name that's pre-filled (and unchangeable from my end) in the agreements is wrong! I literally cannot access these accounts at all until I sign the agreements. Which I'm not going to do when they don't accurately reflect my name. And now I'm being told it will take a week for the bank to get my name fixed on the accounts.
All I can do now is wait the week out and hope they actually get it right this time. I'm not at all confident, given that the documents I have to sign require my name to be printed on them multiple times, and the documents currently have my name listed in two different ways, both of which are wrong!
Don't worry. I will be fine. This ain't my first rodeo with other people butchering my name. I'm just pissed off that I'm having to deal with this when I explicitly told the bank manager what name to put on the accounts precisely so I wouldn't have this problem!
Maegaranthelas
Well-known member
Author and youtuber extraordinare Hank Green isn't actually legally called Hank, but William (iirc).
Names are wild!
I'm sorry the bank is being a butt.
Why is it so often when you've put all the effort into preventing mishaps, that people do the thing wrong anyway? :')
Names are wild!
I'm sorry the bank is being a butt.
Why is it so often when you've put all the effort into preventing mishaps, that people do the thing wrong anyway? :')
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Normally when dealing with legal matters, I just don't let on that my friends call me Laura. If I'm crossing an international border, applying for a passport, or any kind of government-issued ID, purchasing insurance, signing a lease, or any other legal contract, or opening a flipping bank account, I tell the person my full legal name. If they then respond by addressing me by my legal first name, that's fine. I don't care. (I actually prefer that to the alternative "Ms" followed by my surname.) I'm not going to have a personal relationship with this person. Honestly, they could call me "Polkaroo" and I wouldn't get upset--so long as they put my freaking correct legal name on the document they want me to sign!
The problem that happened here is that I currently live in a small town with a human population of < 5000 people, where everybody is up in everyone else's business. Both of my parents used to bank at this same branch. And I've been into the branch with them, because I was helping them with their banking. And at the same time I went in to set up the new accounts I also had to deal with some money left from my father's estate in trust for my brother's kids. So the branch manager knew that my parents called me Laura. He was trying to be helpful and add that personal touch and in doing so screwed things up.
But... I do have some GOOD NEWS today:
They found a bed for my mother in the hospital near my brother! She is moving there today! (She may already be there, in fact. She was on a stretcher prepped for transfer 5 hours ago. I just don't have an update yet since then.)
Last edited:
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
When I left home to attend university I had resolved to just start using my first name, so I wouldn't have issues anymore. But by then I was too attached to the name Laura. And I screwed it up. I introduced myself to my roommate by my first name, but then 30 seconds later I introduced myself to her parents by my middle name. Pretty much all throughout my first day at uni I flip-flopped between one name and the other until nobody knew who the hell I was. Finally I realized I was fighting a losing battle and I apologized to everyone I'd confused and said, "I'm Laura. Please just call me Laura."
One of my closest friends named her daughter such that the name she intended to use for the child is legally her daughter's middle name. Claire was born two years after her mother and I became friends, and I had bitched to her mother on many occasions about all the problems I have encountered because I'm called by my middle name. (Including the story of trying and failing to change my name when I started university.) And then she went and did the same thing to her own kid.
"Why?!" I demanded to know. "WHY!"
People don't think these things through when the kid is just a tiny little baby. But the problems actually start fairly young. When Claire started school, her teacher had assigned desks to everyone, and made up name cards she'd put out on everyone's desks. Half the kids needed help finding their desk, because they hadn't yet learned how to read even their own name. But Claire knew how to read. And she burst into tears because she knew that her name wasn't printed on any of the name cards at any of the desks!
Maegaranthelas
Well-known member
My parents regret that they gave my silbling and me names with the same initial. That has been a mess on many occasions, including pharmacies messing up who is allergic to what.
My sibling was lucky enough to have a regular pronouncable given name though. People mess up both my given and family name xD
And then in the region we moved to when I was young, kids were also confounded that I have no other names (this is a catholic region so religious middle/first names are everywhere).
But yes, if you intend to call a kid a certain name in daily life, don't make that the middle name. It's a mess!
I am very happy a bed has been found for your mother
My sibling was lucky enough to have a regular pronouncable given name though. People mess up both my given and family name xD
And then in the region we moved to when I was young, kids were also confounded that I have no other names (this is a catholic region so religious middle/first names are everywhere).
But yes, if you intend to call a kid a certain name in daily life, don't make that the middle name. It's a mess!
I am very happy a bed has been found for your mother
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
Yikes! That is scary!
My parents managed to create problems for my brother with his name too, because they gave him the same first name as my father. (Which is also the first name of his father and his father before him--so one would think he at least had a clue what he was doing.) They have different middle names, and both use their middle initial on bank accounts and other legal documents. But still my brother and my father have encountered problems with banks mixing the two of them up. (That whole scene is especially fun now that my brother is PoA for our mother, who had joint bank accounts with our father, who is now deceased. At one point my brother was attempting to transfer some funds--which he had the right to do as our mother's PoA--but the bank was insisting that he sign off on the transfer as if he was our dead father! He's not even our father's estate trustee. I am. Which doesn't matter because the funds in question were entirely our mother's by that point.)
Maegaranthelas
Well-known member
I really feel the need for a facepalm 'like' right about now
MadamMeow
Well-known member
Fae
from
Central NJ
Posts: 754
from
Central NJ
Posts: 754
"I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time, but Im too young to worry..."
So glad to hear some good news for your mom at last! 
And so crazy with the names! I never heard of anyone doing this, until I was at where I work now. Two of the girls in my team do this. Thankfully their emails were assigned by how we call them. I never thought of all those other consequences.
Glad you are smart not to sign anything wrong. I think I know people that would do it anyway not wanting to wait.
And so crazy with the names! I never heard of anyone doing this, until I was at where I work now. Two of the girls in my team do this. Thankfully their emails were assigned by how we call them. I never thought of all those other consequences.
Glad you are smart not to sign anything wrong. I think I know people that would do it anyway not wanting to wait.
Syrius
Well-known member
Valkyrie
from
The Sonoran Desert
Pronouns: she/her
Posts: 623
from
The Sonoran Desert
Pronouns: she/her
Posts: 623
"Energy and persistence conquers all things. -Benjamin Franklin"
Good news for your mother!!
I totally hear you on the names thing. My brother has the same thing, he's got the same first name as our father and his grandfather. We grew up calling him by his middle name. My sister, who also named her son the same first name (because she had twins, so let's name them after their grandfathers), but she calls him by that first name. My mom tried to start calling my nephew by his middle name, but my sister nipped that in the bud as fast as she could. My brother has transitioned to only his family and a few friends who call him by his middle name, because it is too bothersome and confusing.
I totally hear you on the names thing. My brother has the same thing, he's got the same first name as our father and his grandfather. We grew up calling him by his middle name. My sister, who also named her son the same first name (because she had twins, so let's name them after their grandfathers), but she calls him by that first name. My mom tried to start calling my nephew by his middle name, but my sister nipped that in the bud as fast as she could. My brother has transitioned to only his family and a few friends who call him by his middle name, because it is too bothersome and confusing.
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 12:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
writing: craft study, story planning
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 20,596
story-a-week challenge: 4 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 4 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 1238
consumable YTD: 46,689
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 87,032
deficit: 40,343
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 100
Consecutive days of French study: 1182
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 19
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
writing: craft study, story planning
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 20,596
story-a-week challenge: 4 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 4 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 1238
consumable YTD: 46,689
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 87,032
deficit: 40,343
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 100
Consecutive days of French study: 1182
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 19
Laura Rainbow Dragon
Well-known member
February 13:
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
writing: craft study, research
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 20,596
story-a-week challenge: 4 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 4 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 0
consumable YTD: 46,689
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 89,056
deficit: 42,367
Falling even further behind on my word count. But I actually spent a bunch of time on my writing work in general this day, mostly doing research for a series of stories I plan to write which I think will be a lot of fun.
Also: in the interest of full disclosure, I did spend some time over the past four days semi-binge-watching the final season of Star Trek: Picard.
I had given up on the show in season two (or possibly season one--I don't remember) because it just was not holding my interest. But I'd heard that season three was actually good. In fact I had heard from another writer who thought that season two of Picard was some of the worst Star Trek writing ever that season three was the best Star Trek writing. Plus I knew Gates McFadden had joined the cast for season three and had heard her say in interviews that she was happy with the season three storyline. She also has not been quiet about how unhappy she was with an aspect of the TNG writing which was also a huge problem for me re: that show, which was how inherently sexist it all was.
So I figured, if Gates McFadden liked the third season writing, and my writing instructor (who has been a fan of Star Trek since TOS and has written many tie-in novels for the franchise) was calling it the best Star Trek writing ever, I would give it a chance. For financial reasons though I had to wait for my public library to purchase the DVDs. And there's a waiting list to sign them out. (Hence the need to binge-watch the episodes when my turn came up.)
My verdict? I agree with my writing instructor. Best Trek ever. The writing is powerful. The actors do powerful work with it. The directing and editing are excellent. The production values across the board are feature-film worthy. The ending is perfect. I laughed. I cried. (I've never cried for any Star Trek before, but the Picard finale got me.) Because my local library branch isn't open on Sundays or Mondays, I can keep the DVDs until Tuesday morning without incurring late-return penalties. I will definitely be trying to get my writing for this week done early so I can re-watch at least the finale again this weekend.
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 101
Consecutive days of French study: 1183
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 20
60 Days of HIIT: another day off
Power Hold: day off
Sore Feet: 2 x DP, did the calf raises one-legged
Wrist Pain: DP (each side where applicable)
Hand Tendons: 2 x DP
running: 3 km
hiking: 6 km with Shelby
writing: craft study, research
new fiction words: 0
fiction YTD: 20,596
story-a-week challenge: 4 of 52 completed
54 stories in my 54th year challenge: 4 of 54 completed
new consumable words: 0
consumable YTD: 46,689
target YTD for 2024 words a day in 2024: 89,056
deficit: 42,367
Falling even further behind on my word count. But I actually spent a bunch of time on my writing work in general this day, mostly doing research for a series of stories I plan to write which I think will be a lot of fun.
Also: in the interest of full disclosure, I did spend some time over the past four days semi-binge-watching the final season of Star Trek: Picard.
I had given up on the show in season two (or possibly season one--I don't remember) because it just was not holding my interest. But I'd heard that season three was actually good. In fact I had heard from another writer who thought that season two of Picard was some of the worst Star Trek writing ever that season three was the best Star Trek writing. Plus I knew Gates McFadden had joined the cast for season three and had heard her say in interviews that she was happy with the season three storyline. She also has not been quiet about how unhappy she was with an aspect of the TNG writing which was also a huge problem for me re: that show, which was how inherently sexist it all was.
So I figured, if Gates McFadden liked the third season writing, and my writing instructor (who has been a fan of Star Trek since TOS and has written many tie-in novels for the franchise) was calling it the best Star Trek writing ever, I would give it a chance. For financial reasons though I had to wait for my public library to purchase the DVDs. And there's a waiting list to sign them out. (Hence the need to binge-watch the episodes when my turn came up.)
My verdict? I agree with my writing instructor. Best Trek ever. The writing is powerful. The actors do powerful work with it. The directing and editing are excellent. The production values across the board are feature-film worthy. The ending is perfect. I laughed. I cried. (I've never cried for any Star Trek before, but the Picard finale got me.) Because my local library branch isn't open on Sundays or Mondays, I can keep the DVDs until Tuesday morning without incurring late-return penalties. I will definitely be trying to get my writing for this week done early so I can re-watch at least the finale again this weekend.
French: Netflix
GOBOT
GBOT
Streaks:
Consecutive days of working out: 101
Consecutive days of French study: 1183
Consecutive days of no solo gaming before work: 20
Nevetharine
Well-known member
Thank the Universe I only have one name... I had a very long surname, which was simplified when I got married.
Since I'm adopted, I've often toyed with the idea of adding the name my real mother gave me as a middle name. But that is a massive process that scares me.
I still use the names my real parents gave me as my pen name for my novels, Camilla Lancaster.
My adopted family doesn't appreciate it all that much... bad family history which I think was just a load of BS anyway, that people who had nothing better to do spewed up.
Both my parents are dead. It legit does not matter anymore.
Since I'm adopted, I've often toyed with the idea of adding the name my real mother gave me as a middle name. But that is a massive process that scares me.
I still use the names my real parents gave me as my pen name for my novels, Camilla Lancaster.
My adopted family doesn't appreciate it all that much... bad family history which I think was just a load of BS anyway, that people who had nothing better to do spewed up.
Both my parents are dead. It legit does not matter anymore.