Rantings, Ravings, and Ramblings

JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics
  • Surprised myself, to be honest
  • Did not plan things well today
  • Had my latest booster shot
  • Walked both ways, which meant both bakeries got a visit!
  • Actually managed to exercise after that
  • The biggest surprise was checking the app to see how much sleep I got
  • Turns out, if I want to be functional on little sleep, it needs to be a long nap
  • 3 hours and 45 minutes worth, specifically
  • Thanks, Liam
  • I did have a nap (about 2 hours)
  • On the plus side:
  • Got the shot, walked in wonderfully brisk weather, sweets(!), and an exceptionally happy pup
  • The sweets: almond croissant (good, but not excellent), and a spiced apple cupcake (ginormous and pleasantly sweet)
  • Plus, the staff of both bakeries are always so nice
  • If I  have to interact with people, that's always a pleasure
  • Good: booster shots up to date
  • Happy: Liam's reaction to me coming home is always the best
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics
  • Iron Heart Program :completed:
  • Daily Kicks Challenge :completed:
  • First Thing Push-Ups Challenge :completed:
  • Liked Iron Heart a lot! Easy to do and the reps didn't increase exponentially
  • Glad the challenges are done
  • Only managed 115 jumping jacks
  • My arm hurts to lift it
  • That's my only side effect, though!
  • Voted!
  • Surprised myself by watching Top Gun: Maverick
  • I watched the first movie so many years ago I can't remember anything of it
  • With that in mind, I loved the sequel!
  • And my parents, who both quite liked the first, thought it was very good, too
  • Late Bills game, but we're doing well so far
  • The weather is supposed to be good tomorrow, so I may sit on the porch with the candy
  • Liam does not like people coming to the door
  • Liam literally sang to the church bells this morning
  • It was over too quickly to get video
  • But know it was adorable
  • Good: voted (with Mom!)
  • Happy: Top Gun was very enjoyable!
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582

  • :thanks: @Sif_Shepard, @NancyTree, @Fremen, @irina_bu,@motionaction, @Anek, @BetaCorvi
  • 2 Minutes bicep extensions
  • Quiet morning, loud evening
  • We had a decent amount of kids come by
  • Liam was in the back room and occasionally loud
  • Every time this country takes a small step forward, it gets pulled back by the fucked up Republican side
  • Really, Supreme Court?
  • Way to shine a spotlight on your blatant, disgusting racism
  • Fuck. You.
  • How much can an assassin really cost?
  • Today hasn't been a great day
  • Happy Halloween to all who celebrated
  • Good: I managed my shower before the kids came by
  • Happy: Liam should be sleepy tomorrow
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics
  • This month's routine:
  • Daily Exercise w EC
  • Power Punch Challenge
  • abs level II Challenge
  • 1000 Push-Ups Challenge
  • walk & run Challenge
  • Splits Exercises
  • walk & run is a repeat, but everything else is a nice combination of new
  • It's great to have a place to easily check what's been done with the challenges
  • Today has been much better!
  • I got to sleep in
  • Didn't remember my dreams
  • (The worst is remembering them as I'm waking and then forget everything)
  • Liam has been a very good, sleepy pup
  • It was incredibly foggy and beautiful
  • (Would have been perfect weather for yesterday!)
  • And I managed to avoid all the candy last night and today!
  • And finally, I rewatched Top Gun: Maverick
  • I needed the smiles and tears
  • I feel much more balanced
  • Good: rewatching the movie
  • Happy: the moment I took a deep breath and felt relief

  • If you zoom in, you can read the stadium sign!
  • Super Dog! That is actually Mom's cape that she wore to work
  • If he happens to look small from the angle
1101221330a_resize_46.jpgIMG_20221031_231503_574_resize_5.jpg
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics
  • Thank you all, I really needed that comfort
  • And thank you, @LizardFriend95; I'm very sorry for forgetting
  • I finally fell asleep around 5:30 and managed to go back to sleep after Liam's barking
  • The 5 hours I got didn't help my emotional control, but it didn't make it worse, either
  • Mom listening to me when she got home from work really helped me calm down
  • I don't think I'm going to be better for a while
  • Hope springs eternal?
  • Good: I managed more than 20 minutes in a row (more than once) of calmness
  • Happy: homemade pizza for supper and Enola Holmes 2 drops tomorrow
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • It was especially good, @LizardFriend95, thanks
  • Basics
  • Cut the abs and push-up challenges today
  • My stomach just could not stand the pressure
  • It's getting better, though, so I'm hopeful I'll be able to do them tomorrow
  • Today has been so busy I've had whole sections of time where I didn't think of much anything at all
  • It was lovely
  • I also remembered that Dad gives the absolute worst outcomes in a great emotional mess that never come true
  • And I have some sort of stomach bug that is causing serious discomfort
  • Was it caused by my emotional distress?
  • Maybe
  • Is it a very real thing, having nothing to do with my anxiety?
  • Yes
  • So that is a great weight off my mind
  • I actually laughed today
  • That hope really did spring...
  • No movie tonight, just too busy
  • Good: too busy to worry
  • Happy: the sigh of relief my entire body went through when I reached mental harmony
  •  And no depression from this episode (😮)
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Thank you, Bees :thanku:
  • Basics
  • My stomach was up to ab work today, thankfully
  • Dad spent the day deep cleaning the kitchen
  • If you're able to pull out the oven, please do so
  • The sides...
  • They can get...
  • Liam woke me at 6:40 with barking
  • Probably a deer or rabbit
  • (Or the cat that's been visiting recently)
  • I calmed him, went back to bed, and had to immediately go back down
  • He stopped after that, but of all the days for Dad to sleep in
  • (I massively slept in after that. I barely managed to wake before noon.)
  • All that sleep does have me feeling much better, though
  • I tried to write this while watching Enola Holmes
  • It's currently paused
  • Very good so far
  • I forgot the 4th wall breaking she does
  • It adds a wonderful humor
  • This is, hopefully, the last warm day of the season
  • Hit 27° at the hottest
  • Good: all that sleep
  • Happy: Enola Holmes 2 is turning out to be just as good as I hoped
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Thank you, @motionaction; your words are a comfort, as always
  • Much appreciated, @CODawn. At least it was to a good team. 🥲
  • Basics
  • Liam was not best pleased to wait until after the game for his walk
  • It's very easy to ignore his whining when the Bills are losing...
  • The power went out about 12:45 (1:45, but DST)
  • It stayed out for 8 and a half hours
  • The air conditioning was off
  • I slept. Just not well.
  • It's cooler today and will be even better tomorrow, though
  • Enola Holmes 2 was wonderful
  • Even better than the first
  • It left some things open, but they can end it here
  • We've rewatched the first two Narnia movies tonight
  • Babies
  • They're all babies
  • (James McAvoy? So. Young.)
  • Good: my appetite is back. So full...
  • Happy: baked something. It didn't turn out exactly as I wanted, but I made it
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics
  • Today started bad, but finished decently
  • I've found a good distraction (Top Gun: Maverick) for when I need to just ignore things for a few minutes
  • Is it weird to call it mindless action when it very much isn't?
  • Talked to Bernice, who suffers many of the same mental and physical illnesses and deficiencies
  • She recommended castor oil for my gastrointestinal difficulties
  • So I'll be trying that tomorrow
  • My brother has been waking up earlier, so if Liam barks after Dad leaves but before I wake up, he deals with it
  • Still interrupting my sleep, but I can fall back to sleep easily enough
  • Why my anxiety upsets my stomach so much I can only vaguely understand
  • But it sucks
  • Here's to tomorrow being a better day
  • Good: E finally decided on his birthday supper (pizza and cake at their place; a fellow after my own heart)
  • Happy: my mind and stomach both calm down immensely when Mom comes home. Just having her sitting in the same room is so soothing.
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics
  • Well, today wasn't great, but I've managed to break my spiral!
  • I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and had some very focused thinking
  • I need to do it regularly, but it's working for now
  • My stomach still hurts, but the gas isn't moving through my GI tract
  • I thought it would be better with Mom's day off
  • Not so?
  • I settled on my stomach on my heat pad and ended up taking a short nap
  • Everything was better after that!
  • Fingers crossed for an even better tomorrow
  • Also for the future of this broken democracy
  • Good: breaking that spiral
  • Happy: Liam was very confused by my position on the couch and had to investigate
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • When he wants to be, @Froud 😅
  • Whatever works, @Nanna Io! Glad you can trick yourself!
  • Thank you very much, @GentleOx. No fun, indeed.
  • Basics
  • I cut the situps, plank, and downward dog
  • My stomach wasn't up to that today
  • Tried the castor oil
  • (Should have last night)
  • It worked!
  • My stomach is still tender, but my intestines don't hate me right now
  • My emotions have been up and down
  • The tears are being followed by laughter
  • Because I refuse to allow my emotions to beat me again
  • We've stopped letting Liam out so much
  • It's working?
  • I don't want to call it a success for another few days
  • (He will go outside just to bark, if we let him)
  • Good: wrapped Es birthday presents
  • Happy: laughing over the truly terrible job I did on one of them
  • (Cut the paper the wrong size. Twice. Decided to go diagonal. It worked. It's ugly. He'll laugh!)
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • 80 seal jacks
  • My appointments with Bee and Tyler were early, so I only did the daily exercise
  • I'll double up tomorrow to catch up
  • Bee is a massage therapist, but something about being so bare physically, it's very easy to be emotionally open as well
  • I ended up crying harder than I have yet after she left
  • It was incredibly cathartic
  • (And she gives the best hugs)
  • E not only loved the wrapping of his present, he was ecstatic at the gift itself
  • So thank you, sister, for telling me what to get him! 🤣
  • She also made a gluten free cake that was excellent
  • This evening was delightful
  • I write this on the drive home
  • The question:
  • What is Liam's reaction going to be?
  • Good: crying
  • Happy: seeing everyone today
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Basics today and yesterday
  • The answer:
  • He ignored me entirely
  • :cry:
  • He was also upset at no walk because of schedules
  • But he was a good boy
  • I was very hungry yesterday
  • So, of course, I was nauseous today
  • And let's not get into the exhaustion, okay?
  • There seems to be a light at the end of this tunnel
  • Dad just tried to throw a curve ball, but Mom told me he's coming around
  • So I should finally feel comfortable enough talking about it soon!
  • (Hopefully)
  • Tyler had some great advice yesterday that I've tried thinking on today
  • It really seems to have helped!
  • The entire practice is just amazing
  • It rained almost all day
  • So Liam is still damp
  • But I've had a cuddling cat for hours!
  • Good: mindful thinking
  • Happy: Liam really loves rain (almost as much as snow) and has been happy and playful all day
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Thank you, @Nanna Io
  • It's not so much looking up as reaching an end point
  • But good nonetheless
  • Basics
  • I reminded myself that exhaustion and headaches are common when cutting back on caffeine
  • I have not had caffeine in 5 days
  • (It upsets my stomach)
  • Is my emotional unbalance causing problems?
  • Yes.
  • But it's not the cause of everything
  • Dad was frustrated with Liam because he was begging for a walk and Dad walked him in the late morning
  • He seemed to forget that if Liam gets a before noon walk, he wants an after noon walk too
  • So we had a pouting pup for a while
  • We're getting into appropriately cold weather!
  • If the prediction holds true, we should see flurries tomorrow morning!
  • (Liam will be ecstatic)
  • Good: pulled myself out of 3 spirals
  • Happy: I have a good blend of mindless humor to perk me back up
 
OJJJEM

OJJJEM

Well-known member
Mother of Dragons Posts: 632
I am pleased with your dedication so far in overcoming caffeine addiction. I know that overcoming addiction is not an easy journey, which makes 5 days even more amazing. I look forward to celebrating your progress alongside you as you continue to work hard to reach your addition recovery goal.
 
JCU

JCU

Well-known member
Scout from WNY
Pronouns: She/Her
Posts: 2,582
  • Thank you, @OJJJEM!
  • It's almost never more than a few cups of tea a day
  • (Discounting the very rare mocha)
  • But it's still a bit of caffeine!
  • I've done it before, for health reasons, it's just easier this time when my body doesn't want the caffeine at all
  • Basics
  • It snowed!
  • Liam was both confused and very happy!
  • He also whined through most of the game because he wanted a walk
  • (That game...)
  • Then he wanted to play after the walk
  • He finally settled down for a nap
  • He sang with the church bells again
  • Silly pup
  • Tomorrow will be an early morning
  • It'll be the biggest test of the lack of caffeine
  • So fingers crossed!
  • Good: I did not snap at others!
  • Happy: Liam finally gave me kisses!
  • (He's been stingy lately...)
 
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