The Paragon Path Towards An Epic Destiny

[Sólveig]

I did @Mamatigerj ! Thank you!

---

Watch.

Very important, considering that the same thing that happened yesterday happened t today. Not the weight debacle, but I couldn't write. I was busy with chores around the house, and I had to suspend my workout because I slept poorly last night. I didn't rest properly after all those Burpees, so I took a break. Nevertheless, I gathered up some energy and did an amount of Burpees according to the first die roll that I did today. Yeah, I rolled the dice twice, with the intention to move the first roll for tomorrow and keep the second roll. I did both rolls today though.

My E key decided to finish breaking tonight. Thankfully, I have an USB keyboard. Thing is that it just takes too much space in my desk now. And the keys are a bit sticky, but I believe that's due to not being used.

December 26th, 2024
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Calf RaIses +EC
Count: 1701 - 1697 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Fit December: Day 27 +Megaset | Day 28 +Megaset
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Crop Top +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Full Burpees | 8 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
One & Done: Butt Kicks: Day 27 - 200 Butt Kicks
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 561 words in 28 minutes! (9/14)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
884 words in 38 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

So I skipped my Watch. I've also started to lose that weight, so I might be on the money when I said it could be just the holidays, however, I'm still mindful about what I'm putting in my mouth. Is not a bad thing to be more mindful about it.

The reasons I skipped my Watch is because I wanted to sleep a bit more. Yeah, I wanted some extra sleep, so I ran through my alarms. On the last Watch I tried to write something, but this keyboard frustrated me so badly that I ragequit and I didn't check the time, so I'm not counting those words. Seriously, the keys are really sticky, and it requires some extra strength to use it. It probably requires some lube, but I'm not a keyboard nerd. If I was a keyboard nerd, I'd have a mechanical one instead. At least gets the job done, and at least it allows me to write, in spite of its quirks. I've had worse. I've seriously had much more worse than this.

I also did my Secret Santa Gift, but I did it at LVL I. Time was... a bit complicated and weird yesterday. It might be better today; who knows? I suck at managing my time. I did use my dumbbells to do some of them, which was... unexpected, and an impulse decision. That was fun!

December 27th, 2024
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Seconds Vrksasana +EC
Count: 1702 - 1698 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Fit December: Day 29 +Megaset +Jumping Jacks instead of Step Jacks
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
1 Double Burpee w/Jump Knee-Tuck
2024 Secret Santa Gift - LVL I:
- Set 1: 11 Full Burpees, 11 Full Burpees w/Jump Knee-Tuck, 11 Full Burpees w/Plank Rotations
- Set 2: 11 Full Burpees, 11 Double Burpees, 11 Full Burpees w/Bicep Curl + Arnold Press
- Set 3: 11 Full Burpees, 11 Full Burpees w/Shoulder Taps, 11 Full Burpees w/Bicep Curl + Arnold Press
Pranamasana + 5-minute Meditation
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
One & Done: Butt Kicks: Day 28 - 204 Butt Kicks
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 543 words in 29 minutes! (10/14)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1131 words in 49 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Watch.

I decided to do nothing. I didn't prepare the D&D session. Instead, I am going to wing it with just a prompt I'll generate in the morning before leaving.

As for how I ended the last week of the year, well, it was a low note. I wasted so much of today, but not everything was at a loss. I continued one of the books that I have. Just one chapter, plus a bit of research upon that book. Quite frankly the last thing I expected from this particular collection is to be sentimental about it, especially considering the fact that this book, like A Million Little Pieces, is a memoir; an anonymous memoir actually, but it has some fictionalized stuff. In fact, people are, to this day, still trying to figure out who was the author, but I digress. The thing is that this chapter got me emotional, enough to warrant making a fanfic that rights the wrongs, because I think that anonymous deserved better than what life did to him.

This might be self indulgent stuff, but that's the whole point. I guess what I lacked to write self indulgent stuff was this type of conviction. In fact, today I noticed the mistakes of my failures, because... well...

I brought out all of my BuJos for the year. I took every single week and put on a spreadsheet every little total I had when it comes with writing and Burpees. I am not putting my results here just yet; that'll be after January 1st. Thing is, after doing all that math, I realized there were only two weeks in this year in which I did not write a single word: one time in which I was very overwhelmed, so I needed to organize myself, and the week after the elections. As for Burpees went, I think the lowest I went was 5 days of the week. There was a point in which I only had three days, but I didn't research the context from it yet. What I'm saying is that I don't have a numbers problem, I have a focus problem.

Now I think I have a solution. NaNoWriMo offered me two things: a deadline, and a drop on my standards. Since I have some ambitious and lofty goals for the first quarter, I am planning to emulate the NaNoWriMo environment so that I can write and get to, at least, 60% of any book that I have on the queue. I would say NaNoWriMo, but after enough delivering, I need to stay put on it, because it's starting to feel like I'm developing Duke Nukem Forever by myself rather than writing that book. I'm getting too ambitious, too intimidated, too free... I mean, every time I go back to that manuscript all I can see is the tons of potential that it only opens up for something that goes into the scope of epic fantasy. "This is a slice-of-life type of thing!" I keep yelling my brain, but then I realize that the Hero's Journey can be applied to real life, and this shows that anyone's life, no matter how boring, can be just like epic fantasy. There's gold in here, but it's like either it's too much, or I require lots of work, thus I procrastinate.

At least I saved the Burpee count with 30 Burpees. It wasn't the highest note, like I said.

Over the next three days I'll be planning my quarter, and reviewing 2024 through my BuJos to see what can I do better next year, because I did a lot of mistakes. Having perfectionism taking over is the worst of them.

December 28th, 2024
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Side Leg Raises +EC
Count: 1703 - 1699 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Fit December: Day 30 +Megaset
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Burpee Queen +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 16 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
One & Done: Butt Kicks: Day 28 - 227 Butt Kicks
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 529 words in 25 minutes! (11/14)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
980 words in 38 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 7996 words
• Burpees: 7 days, 1020 Burpees
• 1 days of reading

---

Well, this is disappointing. I'm not surprised however, I knew the wordcount was going to be low. Unfocused, still deliberating... Yeah, as I stated, this was an underwhelming way to end the year.

Looking at the Bird's Eye View of what my NaNo counter looks like it actually shows what I'm able to do if I'm focused in one thing. The moment the barriers are down, however, I'm deliberating.

I'm also noticing that this week might have been a week of 0 words if it weren't for the weekly thing I tried, and the 365 challenge. Like I said, focused work. I'm too disperse, and it doesn't add up to anything.

In other words, I must bring back the NaNo stress for this first quarter. Boot camp is over, now I'm going to war.

E: Panic. I realized that my NaNoWriMo stopped being a romance. In fact, it is a slice-of-life, sure, but the proportions of it are... bigger. Much, much bigger. I'm talking about Tolkien levels of gargantuan, of Homer levels. I'm talking about that, in structuring the Hero's Journey upon it, I accidentally infused the spark of the Oddysey in it, the spark of Prometheus, the life of Jesus, Moses, Beowulf... There is myth involved, myth of epic proportions. I just wrote a bloody epic fantasy work without the fantasy tropes and all of that especulative fiction. No swords, no magic, no dragons, nothing of that. I went over my own head, and now I am just realizing that what I did on NaNo was much bigger than I thought.

"'What shall we do?’ said Twoflower. ‘Panic?’ said Rincewind hopefully. He always held that panic was the best means of survival."
-Terry Pratchett, The Light Fantastic.

So anyway, I am having a panic attack right now.

 

[Maegaranthelas]

Maybe you're just fundamentally incapable of being 'boring'
But big hugs for you, I hope the panic fades soon

 

[Sólveig]

@Maegaranthelas Possibly. I just can't be not busy, even though boredom prompts ideas. The problem is the AD from ADHD: I lack focus. If I don't lock myself into one thing completely, I'll disperse myself thin, and I'll become that dumb donkey that died of dehydration because he didn't know whether to eat or to drink water.

I swear I was screaming on bed about this project going much bigger than I thought!

 

[Sólveig]

I took out* the need to write a thing weekly for 10 minutes daily. Thus, my wordcount for Sunday was low, but it was at least 500. I'm okay with it. As long as it is > 250, I'm fine.

D&D day. At the end of the day, I ended up rolling a couple of times in TSAT and created a session in which I was no the DM. Yeah, we played a bit in the style of Ironsword, which was a bit quirky, but it left me free to actually play rather than be simultaneously a DM and a player. Since I'm the only one who can read Mythic GME's table, I'm in charge of the D% rolls. It was good fun, and it took us places. All I needed was just a strip of paper to write down my rolls, and the story unfolded in the middle of play. I think I am going to do this from now on. Now, I can still be back behind the screen as I do when I switch to ICRPG, as I am in control of everything, but this approach was much better. No DM, just let Mythic do its thing.

As for the matters of the Watch, I did wake up at midnight, not really in the mood to write... but I did something self-indulgent. A skeleton thing that ended up as a two-part story to which I didn't finish the second part. It's still difficult to write with this keyboard; again, it is very, very sticky. The keys tend to get stuck, requires extra effort to press them, and it tires my left wrist, no matter the position I put it. I'm using a pillow right now to see if that lowers the impact a bit, but I can tell the pain is caused by the extra strength that I need to put on this thing. At least it allows me to write. Sure, there are a bit more typos, but hey, I activated Hemingway mode during the Watch, so I embraced those typos.

Nice day. Just planning my week, leaving me for today and tomorrow to actually plan my day.

This was our final D&D session of the year, and it was good fun. One of the characters showed his true colors, and it's just brilliant. I had quite a good time.

December 29th, 2024
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Second Back Leg Raised Hold +EC
Count: 1704 - 1700 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Fit December: Day 31 +Megaset
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Jumping Jacks
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
One & Done: Butt Kicks: Day 29 - 203 Butt Kicks
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 544 words in 38 minutes! (12/14)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
544 words in 38 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Maegaranthelas]

Congrats on Fit December

 

[Mamatigerj]

Cheers for Fit December!

 

[Laura Rainbow Dragon]

Congratulations on completing Fit December @Sólveig !

Cheers for a good day and a fun D&D session!

 

[Syrius]

Congrats on staying fit in December!

 

[PetiteSheWolf]

Well done on Fit December!

 

[Anek]

Happy badge day!

 

[Fremen]

Congrats

 

[MadamMeow]

Congrats for Fit December!

 

[Sólveig]

@Maegaranthelas @Mamatigerj @Laura Rainbow Dragon @Syrius @PetiteSheWolf @Anek @Fremen @MadamMeow Thank you!

 

[Nevetharine]

Happy badge day!

 

[Sólveig]

@Nevetharine Thanks!

---

Watch.

Chores covered most of my day, if not the entire day. Nevertheless I managed to write, but nothing short of progress for my comeback. However, what I wrote on my previous Watch was interesting, because I think it is a story that, after having it cleaned up, I can actually publish it. I did three more months, so I'm only one quarter left to have all calendars for 2025. All I know is that, on January 1st, I'll pretty much start a NaNo to do some focused work in my book. Not the one I did on NaNo though, something quicker. The one I did on NaNo pretty much exploded now that I realize the scope is the same as epic fantasy, and anything that I do to cut down the potential is destroying the story. My only question right now is how do I do it? Seriously, as I tried to do my First Sleep tonight, that was the only thing I could think of. How do I write epic fantasy without the dragons, the magic, the swords, and all of that?

I guess the answer lies somewhere in D20 Modern. I just thought of that book as I wrote. No, I don't mean I'll do an actual play of D20 Modern, but some text from the Core Rulebook might offer the insight that I'm looking for. Page 188 is the beginning of Chapter Seven: Gamemastering. I may have to start reading there and see what do I get.

I just did a quick browse through it. Here's a tidbit of Page 188 itself:

Once your character moves to center stage and the campaign begins, he or she slides from ordinary to the heroic. Heroic characters are larger than life and able to accomplish things we ordinaries can only dream about. Heroes go adventuring, they gain experience and improve, they go up against terrible odds-and, most of the time, they ultimately succeed.

While I don't plan to have this as something of epic proportions, such as, for instance, a modern day Beowulf fighting Dragons (which, to be fair, it does sound awesome), the scope that is a Beowulf fighting a more figuratively Dragon is more of what I'm looking for. I am not seeking to this book to feature a character that goes from zero to twenty literally, but one that, as the story unfolds, it might remain on zero level, but their mind is different by the end of it. Remember, Gandalf was a 5th-level Magic User. This character is a Level Zero character through and through.

I'm not writing this yet, but I guess I know where to look for answers now. D20 Modern might be a good place to start. I would say GURPS, but the issue with GURPS is that it is too generalized, and especulative fiction things, such as sci-fi and the supernatural, creeps in, so I must weed those out. At least the Core Rulebook of D20 Modern tries to keep out the more especulative materials and contain them in Chapter Nine.

It's time to write now.

December 30th, 2024
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 Side-to-side Backfists +EC
Count: 1705 - 1701 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Awaiting next month
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
7 Full Burpees
Set 1: Full Burpees
Set 2: Full Burpees with Bicep Curl + Arnold Press
Set 3: Full Burpees with Jump Knee-Tuck
Set 4: Double Burpees
Set 5: Double Burpees with Jump Knee-Tuck
Monday +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 4 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
One & Done: Butt Kicks: Day 30 - 203 Butt Kicks
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 469 words in 23 minutes! (13/14)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1516 words in 57 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Syrius]

Congrats on One and Done butt kicking!

 

[PetiteSheWolf]

Re-grats!

 

[TopNotch]

Congrats x 2!

 

[Maegaranthelas]

Butts Kicked!

 

[Fremen]

Congrats

 

[Laura Rainbow Dragon]

Congratulations on completing One & Done @Sólveig !

 

[Mamatigerj]

Happy Butt-kicking Badge Day!

 

[MadamMeow]

Congrats on One & Done!

 

[Anek]

Congrats on the challenge!!

 

[Sólveig]

@Syrius @PetiteSheWolf @TopNotch @Maegaranthelas @Fremen @Laura Rainbow Dragon @Mamatigerj @MadamMeow @Anek Thank you!

---

Well, I did a list, and did none of it. Chores, relaxing, and just finishing up the year. What a rollercoaster 2024 was. Times will be interesting again on January 10th, but hopefully, this time, there won't be that paranoia. I... really don't want to go over that again in my entire life, ever. I hope this year burns really well with all those fireworks. I am done. I am through. I am taking back my life.

Which means that I might actually be out of the Belly of the Whale. It was quicker than I thought too. Not only I wrote as I waited for midnight, but I managed to do nearly 2K in just an hour. Of course, I started a new series to come back to the place I used to publish, and I did it under the Fleming method. Three chapters out of twelve I did, 10 minutes per chapter. I'm plantsing this because the only plot I had is the idea, and today I just did the characters in eight scraps of paper. Even my thing for writing every day for a year was bad, but I don't care. Everything is salvagable, especially this series. I wrote three cahpters with the Fleming method; chapters that are supposed to be 1500 to 2500 words long, but it was all bewtween 430 and 570 words. In 10 minutes, I wrote everything about the chapter. Everything. It's bad. It's really awful. It's completely unpublisheable. However, something happened: I knew it was going to be bad, I expected for it to be bad. The thing is that I feel I'm getting somewhere. No, I don't feel it, I am getting somewhere. I am actually building something.

Speaking of building, I have the final stats for the year! I tried to do some graphs, but I couldn't. I'll check how to do them some other time, but here's the total:

• Words written: 245646 words in 180 days
• Burpees done: 46750 Burpees in 331 días

So I pretty much missed a month of Burpees. As for writing, I pretty much wrote for 50% of the year. That netted me a total wordcount that amounts to, roughly, somewhere between 4 and 5 James Bond novels. Thing is the highest wordcount happened during November. Do you know what happened in November? NaNoWriMo happened. This means that 60K out of those 245646 words was only focused work. That's the thing: I can do this! I can write! I can punch out even more words than Stephen King, especially now that I got nearly 2K in 60 minutes through the use of timers. There's a reason why I put 2500 words as my gold standard: if I write 2500 words it means that I've done my work for the day, and I can close the business and do whatever I want for the day. However, I do enjoy writing in very short bursts. It's me against the clock. I know when it starts, and I know when it ends, but I get so hyperfocused that I lose myself until the timer goes off. I am punching out 500 words in 10 minutes in the computer; double of what I do on my phone, and in English.

So here's the problem: lack of focus. If I put my focus onto something, I can actually put those 250K into one place. I can actually build something instead of starting many minute things and going nowhere. The video about drawing the same thing for a year quotes Casey Neistat on that, and I'm noticing it in both the challenge that I started two weeks ago, and today, when I wrote three chaptes of a series. The best part is that these skeletons are malleable, meaning that I can modify them as I need to while I start adding the meat to the story.

I think I can do this. I think I can work much better now knowing that my problem is not the wordcount, but rather the fact that I put out so many words, but none of them amount to anything. I also need to work on the other 185 days that I missed. So yeah, this insight is key. I need something to focus on. I need an ultimate finish line to work upon. After all, this is a marathon that's only done through series of HIIT sprints. If I can run further than the rest in less time, then I have enough time to recover as I start building up the story back up.

As for NaNo... I didn't do anything for it today, but I can start reading tomorrow. I am now confident that I can do something as large as Epic Fantasy without turning it into especulative fiction, or making my protagonist not be an everywoman. I mean, she is not an everywoman, but she is an everywoman in the sense that she has no above average skills like all heroes from myth do. Even Harry Potter is above average.

December 31st, 2024
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Jump Squats +EC
Count: 1706 - 1702 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Awaiting next month
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
8 Full Burpees
WoD: The Final Countdown - LVL III +EC +Rest between levels
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Awaiting next month
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 523 words in 34 minutes! (14/14) New Milestone reached!
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1966 words in 64 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

I thought about pressing edit, but nah... I'll embrace my typos this time.

Happy New Year!

My first roll of the year was 16!

 

[TopNotch]

Congrats on your milestone!

 

[Mamatigerj]

Happy New Year, @Sólveig!

 

[MadamMeow]

That is a whole lot of burpees! Congrats for that and your writing!

 

[Sólveig]

@TopNotch @Mamatigerj @MadamMeow Thank you and Happy New Year!

---

I slept through, which was required. Still, it was a day of mostly admin, less writing my book, but more about improving. The day before I started a series. It was awful, but then again. I'm writing the skeleton of a story, so it had to be awful. The purpose is for it to be extremely horrible. I did two more episodes, and guess what? The prose improved. It is a skeleton still, but these two new episodes were far better written and had much more meat onto them. I still can't get over on how malleable this thing is; it feels more like I'm molding something out of clay, or I'm actually mixing up flour with water to make a dough, and then shaping the dough. Once I start entering into making a draft out of this skeleton, I can for sure know which thing needs to be modified, scrapped, or moved, mostly because the story will be over by the time I'm done.

Now I get it. I get how Ian Fleming wrote Casino Royale in three weeks. In fact, now that I think about it, my first novel, which I started almost ten years ago (it's like two or three months away before it turns 10 years old at this point), I wrote it in two weeks, and it was exactly this: a skeleton. I remember not writing too much prose because my fixation was to make it a graphic novel, so there were points in which there was no narration, but instructions on how the story keeps going through silent panels. If it worked before, I don't see any reason on why it shouldn't work now. I actually edited the beginning of it a year later, and it got me admitted into a writing course. I should pick it back up, rewrite it, and stuff. There's tons of things that I've done that truly deserve a revamp, but that's not something I'll be focusing on right now.

Also, Extreme HIIT made me do a total of 127 Burpees. I did three more to get to 130. Add in Before Breakfast Burpees and you get 180. Death by Burpees, and then it's 380. Just because, I did 20 more, so yeah, another day of... 400 Burpees!

Lastly, remember that weight gain? It's not just holiday gain, but there's muscle on it. I knew it was muscle because I returned to my weight before the gain, slapped on some pants, and they felt tight. Yeah, I noticed in the mirror that my buttocks got bigger. Is this transitioning?

E: What was that typo?! I didn't write THAT much!

January 1st, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 50 Jumping Jacks +EC
Count: 1707 - 1703 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Day 1 - LVL III
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
3 Full Burpees
20 Full Burpees
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 16 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 1
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 540 words in 33 minutes! (15/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1472 words in 53 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Man, I didn't have time today whatsoever. It was a day full of chores: groceries, cooking, cleaning, organizing the water, water came, more cooking, putting groceries in place, planning my mom's return on the weekend.

Painful. Just painful. I couldn't write, and my mind got scattered, but at least I managed to put out the challenge. I didn't catch a break! I barely managed to squeeze a workout because I ran out of time for everything, so my schedule looked like the first level of Donkey Kong. Still had a few revelations today, and maybe I got trapped by illusion once more. It's not a thing. I still can't get over a fact though: I had a dream last night that I was walking on the streets and walked around this sidewalk in which there was a tiny flea market, but it wasn't really a flea market. There was a shelf there, with brand new books on it. Books, and comic books, and manga... it had everything. I don't think there were some known titles, but I browsed through them in awe. It was cute to have that dream, honestly.

250 Burpees today, 545 word written. Not much to say except that I had to do a lot of chores. I was supposed to do only groceries, but as I did them I realized I might need to actually put some more food around, just in case. Still, I'm going over a bit of a conundrum right now. When I told my ex about my progress, her answer wasn't just a nice job, but it's like I reminded her that she hasn't done anything... and then I realized that I may have been the only one making progress in both that relationship and myself, but she stagnated. Now I'm wondering if it's even worth it to keep being her friend. I guess I should journal about this.

January 2nd, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Leg Raises +EC
Count: 1708 - 1704 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Day 2 - LVL III
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 12 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 2
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 545 words in 24 minutes! (16/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
545 words in 24 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[TopNotch]

When I told my ex about my progress, her answer wasn't just a nice job, but it's like I reminded her that she hasn't done anything... and then I realized that I may have been the only one making progress in both that relationship and myself, but she stagnated. Now I'm wondering if it's even worth it to keep being her friend.

In my view, if you're moving forward and someone else is standing still, you can try to drag them along behind you but as soon as you get tired (and you will if you're moving for both of you), they'll hold you back. Sometimes you've just got to let go the rope and keep moving on.

 

[Sólveig]

In my view, if you're moving forward and someone else is standing still, you can try to drag them along behind you but as soon as you get tired (and you will if you're moving for both of you), they'll hold you back. Sometimes you've just got to let go the rope and keep moving on.

Just because we left the door open doesn't mean that I must come through. That's what I've concluded in my walk this morning. I thought about this too, and I've been thinking about this for a while. I'll let time decide for me, but if we drift apart, at least I'll be at peace knowing that it was for the best of us. Six years are difficult to overcome, but I am hopeful that there's someone better. I am certain that there is.

 

[Sólveig]

Watch.

Apparently my mom is not coming on this weekend as she was rather ellusive when I asked her about it. I'm not desperate about it, but I can't keep the charade for longer now that the entire neighborhood is asking about her.

Another day of not writing my book, and I'm starting to feel pissed off. I have chores to do tomorrow too, but this one was planned. I am going to take this Watch not to write my book, but to actually journal, as I came out to a realization that getting out of this Belly of the Whale might require cutting one last tie. So I did. I gave myself a deadline for a weekly checkup and see where does that lead into, but the way I'm seeing is that it'll go nowhere. Again, I'll let time be the wiser. In cases like this, time is always the one who makes the choice for me, and it always ends up the right way.

Is not the end of the world though. When I said that there's someone better, I mean it. This isn't me patting myself in the back and saying "there, there," this is me actually eyeing what could be an opportunity, another Call to Adventure, if we're using Joseph Campbell for this. I won't do anything about it just yet because it is far more complciated. I'll talk to my therapist about it because I need strategy and to clear my head. It's a chance that can wait until then; that's for sure. Its deadline is nowhere near, so I can wait. Who knows? It might be nothing. It is a leap of faith, after all, a huge leap of faith that is the result of me aiming for the stars... but here's the thing: almost seven years ago, I ended up in a relationship that lasted for six years because I took the same leap of faith. I wasn't intending to end up in something, and it ended up in something. So yeah, it means another adventure, but I'm willing to take the chance. Either way, even the worst case scenario is still a win for me because I am proving myself better than my own fears.

Am I afraid? Oh, I'm frightened. I will be really frightened once I take that leap. However, I am more excited than frightened, which is even better. It means fear is pushing me forward instead of holding me back. Joe Dispenza is an old friend I'll be revisiting for this one.

250 Burpees, 536 words written, and my lower body is seriously tired from all those Jumping Lunges. Dude... I've never felt my legs shake that much since the first time I did 100 Burpees. I don't know when those lunges stopped being lunges, but they stopped around set 5 or 6. I mean, the program is called Extreme HIIT for a reason, but damn! This is just the third day, and I'll have Burpees on Day 5, which is Sunday, and everyone confirmed Sunday to be a videogame day instead of a D&D day! I am... not going to make it... she says after ranting about doing a leap of faith that might be a better thing for her than the previous relationship.

January 3rd, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Jumping Lunges +EC
Count: 1709 - 1705 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Day 3 - LVL III
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 3
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 536 words in 24 minutes! (17/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
536 words in 24 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

A bit of a Watch report before my Dead Sleep because I felt compelled to do it: I just managed to clean up my NaNoWriMo and extracted all the individual scenes, laying them out in different Markdown documents. I ended up with 37 scenes, which to me it only confirms that this is a work of Epic Fantasy. The "romance as a genre" intention that I originally had might be drop seeing that, as a romantic story, it has the same big scope as Final Fantasy VIII has, but it'll end differently. There's no choice here but to write an Epic Fantasy story minus the sword and sorcery elements, dragons, and other related stuff.

Thing is that I've had plenty of doubts, and I'll be picking this back up now that I feel ready for it. What I forgot is that I already have a solution for those doubts that is staring at me from my shelf. Ever heard of Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon? That trilogy is his work of Epic Fantasy; it's the Lord of the Rings of the Cyberpunk genre. While it's very dense, and in true Neal Stephenson fashion ends in disappointment, it is one help that I have, aside from Discworld, though Discworld is Epic Fantasy as a whole. Time to read D20 Modern. Again.

 

[Sólveig]

Not a Watch.

In fact, I got distracted. I am overwhelmed. I listed everything that attracted to me so that I can focus... and I ended up with 12 elements. One of those projects is NaNoWriMo, the other is the phone project, and another two projects I listed them to "start writing" for this week, which I kinda did today? I already put every prompt for each story for my anthological novel, so now all I have to do is finally start writing. I just procrastinated a lot. I'm still not in a good mood knowing the decision I made, but I'm also really, really excited about the new prospects. Honestly, even though I put a huge question mark for January 10th, as I told my dad earlier today, I don't give a f*ck about who gets the throne. It doesn't matter. At the end of the day, things will get worse before they start improving, regardless of who is in power. Even the one who has used it for wrong must keep the ship from sinking. After I lost all hope I realized there's a damned sword swinging from the top of that throne. People don't see it, and they are all expecting a miracle, but that will never come unless that sword falls.

Again, the only thing for me to do is focus on myself. Let the politicians kill each other for all I care. Hell, my philosophical anarchist thought it's telling me it's better that way. All I have to do right now is write, start over, and do things right this time. I can actually start tonight. All I need to do is pull off some stats, plan out my week, and ready myself for the Road of Trials.

It's over. I think I'm out of the Belly of the Whale. Now it's time to go back into writing, and this time, I won't let my own perfectionism win. This time, I'll make it right.

January 4th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Seconds Raised Leg Plank Hold +EC
Count: 1710 - 1706 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Day 4 - LVL I
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Full Burpees
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 4
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 508 words in 23 minutes! (18/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
508 words in 23 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 7087 words
• Burpees: 7 days, 1528 Burpees
• No days of reading

---

I'm including the last three days of last year, hence the Burpee count was not only higher, but also not ending in tens. This won't be on the final stats for this year though.

Not a bad way to start the year, I suppose. Still, not a good way. A bit much admin, and a bit of a struggle, but I'm getting back there, albeit slowly. Things really took a twist this week, especially when it comes to my own things. I mean, I'm still having the doubts, like... can I really take that leap of faith? I took one before, but could I be successful again? This time is harder... much, much harder. Then again, there's no losing. Even at a loss, I'll be winning.

Then there's the writing. I'll have to be honest with you, I'm pretty transgressive when it comes to writing, pretty much because I don't like to censor myself (though I do it here for being polite), but I also don't like to sugarcoat my work. When I write something that's from my heart, it usually comes out with that reason. The 12 books that I want to write that I mentioned; out of these 12 books, 7 will ruffle some feathers. They are fire. Others can be fire too, but these 7 that I just reviewed... they are extremely fire, like, it would definitely trigger the book burning mob on me. Am I afraid of that? Hell no! If anything, I'll be the one tossing gasoline to the fire. I'm just divided. I know the anthology that I chose is one of those controversial stories, and... Well, I wrote bits of it, and I already love it.

I'll just shut up and start writing.

 

[Sólveig]

Watch.

Today was a bit of a whirlwind. I didn't write on my previous Watch, but I got my plans going... only to toss them out the window becaue I needed to take a break and enjoy one little thing: mom came back. That is good news, on one hand! I finally got to see her after a month, and she seemed to have quite a good time.

There seems to be a problem though... My aunt's dementia has worsened over the past month. Like really badly. So things got tense, and I wasn't caught in the middle, but it sounds like things are going to be much harder inside the household. So if I want another reason to not care for whatever happens in January 10th, there, I've got another one.

So, I cancelled everything... except meeting up with my group. D&D was skipped in favor for the PS3. Our friend finally got into Saints Row IV, and we took turns to play by creating our own D&D characters into the game, and just causing mayhem galore. SR4 was already good fun back in the day, but adding the inside jokes that we had while on Image as Designed, customizing Boss? That was just a cherry on the top, and plenty of ideas for more sessions because the absurdity of our urban fantasy campaign just ramps up more and more.

While the day was a mixed bag, tossing the plans out the window was worth it. They also learned that I'm interested in someone, but I didn't say much about it. I kept it for me, at least for now.

I nearly abandoned the challenge and skipped the Burpees. Had to skip the main workout because of mom's arrival, but again, it's fine. I don't care if I tossed my plans out the window. I wanted to feel some love.

January 5th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 5 Cross Tricep Extensions +EC
Count: 1711 - 1707 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Day 5
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 5
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 468 words in 20 minutes! (19/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
468 words in 20 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Watch.

I decided to cancel Extreme HIIT temporarily, and start over. This week is being rather chaotic. My brother got me a phone, but it needs a new battery, and I walked over the city today on the look for it. Twice. So, as long as I'm having that pending, which hopefully it'll be this week only, I won't be able to do Extreme HIIT. I mean it. I came home with my legs feeling horrible, and I've been carrying the DOMS from the day with Jumping Lunges too.

Another day without working out, but I walked so much that I had to put my legs on the wall.

On the other hand, I got my appointment with my therapist, which will be happening... next week. Yeah, it's happening on Wednesday, which is Teacher's Day too. Am I excited? Sure. I mean, aside from the goals for this year, there's the leap of faith, so... panic! I did not prepare myself to see him so soon! It's rather short notice, but at least I am going to see him quicker than a month later. I really, really want this leap of faith to work.

Noticed today that my posture standing is... different. I'm puffing up my chest more. Even sitting down right now, I am puffing up my chet a bit more. It's giving me a bit of titties, ngl, which is good, even though people see them as pecs? I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, is not bad, it's just new. I just looked down one random time and I was like "what the heck, did my boobs grow?" and then I realized it was the way I stood.

12 has been a constant number this week. I have 12 projects, and for the 365 challenge I had no idea about what to do today, so I put 5 minutes on the timer and started to produce a list of ideas. I got 12, and rolled a D12 to pick one. It drove me someplace I didn't expect, but hey, it got me forward.

Also added words to my book. Actual words. I don't think I made something that starts with an "oomph" since the thing I started writing is the first story, but I started it. It's just an anthology anyway, and the stories that will take time will be at least 10K, 13.5K, and 30K long. I chose those specific amounts because of the anthology that I read, and I liked that it had some novellettes and a novella, even though it was really visible that the author worked under commission at 1$ the page. Still, that anthology is dear to my heart, and while I'm not paying tribute to it or anything, I'm just using the lessons that I've learned from it to build this one because, unlike that anthology which only a few characters were recurrent, this one is a fully blown anthological novel, more akin to the Witcher books than anything else.

I sent my best friend a picture of the zines with my characters for the project, the characters of the series that'll be my comeback, 3D6, a D100, my GURPS Ultra-Lite manual (it's another zine), the Mythic GME Fate Chart, and a bunch of pens. Due to having recognizeable characters and names that'll pop up in the future, I won't share them here because, as I said before, I'm quite a transgressive writer, and I don't want to draw that kind of attention here.

Perfectionism is striking, but making things bad is giving a fight.

January 6th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 50 Single Leg Hops +EC
Count: 1712 - 1708 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Rebooted. On hold until further notice
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 5
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 515 words in 25 minutes! (20/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
783 words in 35 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Watch.

I returned to meditating. It happened a bit out of the blue, at noon, and got some insights about the things that I'm looking for. It was more as if the universe gave me a warning before moving forward, and told me to check the behaviors that I'm dragging since this could be a reaction rather than action. Good thing I decided to not do anything because indeed I need to do some housekeeping. Not just about my writing, but checking out what went wrong on my end in that relationship. Aside from not prioritizing it, I do realize that I played quite a lot of a therapist role in it. It is in this log, and it is also in my journal. Even though those six years were beautiful, it was taxing on my emotional wellbeing. I took it because I was also too emotionally attached to it. Now that I think about it, the sunk cost fallacy might apply here very well, but that would imply it was a wasted effort, which I don't think it is. Had not been for her, I wouldn't have graduated, or even considered writing on the genre that I do now. Those were two massive things that wouldn't have happened, and maybe I would have died on that night of March 10th during the blackout.

It's just that... 2024 left a sour taste in general. I was already going down since February, but when May arrived and she cut the relationship, I went down faster than I could have. I can't stress this enough, but I was really, really lucky that I didn't get arrested. One wrong signature, and the story would be so much different now. Everything fell apart, and I'm still piecing myself up together. It's hard to finally close this chapter, but knowing that I have that lingering wish tells me that the only way is forward, and forward I'm moving. The fact that I went back into meditating shows that I'm already moving forward.

There was some writing last night too. Not so much during the day though. Even though I've written the wrong way because I skipped one important part for me to shush the voices inside my head, I think I'll focus more into finishing a skeleton of this book first rather than crafting each story perfectly. Seriously, one of the thoughts that I've had while writing was that there was a missing oomph in the first story, and I wish that was a limiting belief, so I need to step back for a moment, get the bird's eye view again, and get closer more slowly. I also kept asking myself how the hell I craft an epic fantasy minus the sword and sorcery elements. I got an answer, which then left me to a question that sounds quite a lot like a journaling prompt:

What are your dragons? What are your demons? What are your quests? What is it that you want, and what's stopping you from getting it?

I guess the problem is not writing that novel, but answering the questions that come from this: How do I write an epic fantasy story without the fantasy elements? It's a plan for the day to answer this question.

As for tonight, tonight's a Watch. Tonight, I'll organize this book, in paper... and then I'll start writing. I won't discard the things from last night, but I'll put them on the side. This might be perfectionism speaking, but I know I can do better. Indeed, I can perform better than what I've done.

January 7th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 10 Double Burpees with Jump Knee-tuck +EC
Count: 1713 - 1709 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Rebooted. On hold until further notice
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
8 Full Burpees
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 8 Jumping Jacks | 20 Lunges | 12 Full Burpees
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 5 | Day 6 | Day 7
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 470 words in 30 minutes! (21/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1259 words in 61 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Well, it's been years since this has ever happened: because I am dealing with NaNo as I try to figure out the answer to the question of how do I make epic fantasy without the fantasy (which Suzanne Collins already brought another solution to that problem; thank you Hunger Games!), the story morphed once more. The romance angle that I wanted to give it? Reframed. Did I ditch the story? Nope. In fact, I reframed it.

See the image and the song lyrics? That's how I reframed it. Due to the issues that I'm going through, and the fact that ever since I've read Amadis of Gaul I've wanted to make a chivalric romance, I figured the original angle I had for NaNo would derive perfectly into something as such to not only finally close a chapter in my life with a beautiful bow and have a nice book deriving from the pain, but also as a way to celebrate the new things. Yeah, this became way too personal now. The more I try to answer that question, the more questions that I've got. Then again, Joseph Campbell gave me the answer to my original question already: "The cave that you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek."

Now my question is a different one: what is it that my main character wants, and what's stopping her from it? Which then became what is it that I want, and what's stopping me from it. The cool part about this question is that you may not know the answer until you stumble upon it, which is more or less what happened in my original draft for NaNo. It's true to life though: you may not know the answer to that question until you stumble upon it.

As I said before it has been quite a while since another project derived from me fixing another thing. That's how my first novel began, actually: it derived from something else, but it had a different question that I had back in 2015... a question that later on that year lead me into discovering that I'm transgender.

I want to share some other powerful quotes from Joseph Campbell that really hit me as I'm trying to answer that question. None of these would look out of place in @Fremen 's log:

“Life has no meaning. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer.”

“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

 

[Sólveig]

Posting early this time. After a while answering that question, reading in the middle of a powercut (which hey! it's been a while), and writing the challenge, I couldn't do much today. I still have what derived from my NaNo, but I'll use the Watch to write it whole before going into my book. I just journaled for the day. I've been keeping tabs with the meditation too, and started to notice more patterns of behavior. Then again, as I was doing research to answer that stupid question, there was a quote from Joseph Campbell that I missed to put on too:

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”

I just realized that I think this is the universe itself giving me a chance to pursue something that I thought of pursuing when I was feeling down one time, mostly because I've awoken feelings that I shouldn't have, but I know that's normal. We're all humans after all. Thing is now I have the shot. The more I keep thinking about it, the more afraid I am, but in a good way. I know this time I am making things right by focusing on my writing first, which I know it doesn't look like it, but damnit, I always get scattered.

Anyway, I'm going to put a leash on this horse, and it begins tonight. I've answered my original question, but now there's the other question that I have: what is it that my protagonist wants and what is stopping her from getting it? I don't really know. In fact, her motivation was never clear in my story, except curiosity. I could just... start writing and I'll figure it out as I write. I know her, but I don't know what does she want in this story. Things have changed a lot since NaNo, and with the romance thing being modified as I'll dedicate that thing its own story, I'll have to rethink a bit, and start plantsing a little. Maybe just write a couple of skeleton pages showcasing the status quo before I finally figure out what's the Call to Adventure. Like I said, you may not know the answer until you stumble upon it.

Went back into my workouts today. 250 Burpees. Rest is over. Burpees are back.

Addendum: to clarify, I know the question isn't stupid. The fact that is f*cking with my head is just making me mad at it. It's like a Sudoku that I can't seem to find the solution of.

January 8th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 20 Prone Reverse Fly +EC
Count: 1714 - 1710 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Rebooted. On hold until further notice
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Zombie - LVL SS +No rest between sets
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 20 Sit-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 8
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 534 words in 25 minutes! (22/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
534 words in 25 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Well, it's been years since this has ever happened: because I am dealing with NaNo as I try to figure out the answer to the question of how do I make epic fantasy without the fantasy (which Suzanne Collins already brought another solution to that problem; thank you Hunger Games!), the story morphed once more. The romance angle that I wanted to give it? Reframed. Did I ditch the story? Nope. In fact, I reframed it.

See the image and the song lyrics? That's how I reframed it. Due to the issues that I'm going through, and the fact that ever since I've read Amadis of Gaul I've wanted to make a chivalric romance, I figured the original angle I had for NaNo would derive perfectly into something as such to not only finally close a chapter in my life with a beautiful bow and have a nice book deriving from the pain, but also as a way to celebrate the new things. Yeah, this became way too personal now. The more I try to answer that question, the more questions that I've got. Then again, Joseph Campbell gave me the answer to my original question already: "The cave that you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek."

Now my question is a different one: what is it that my main character wants, and what's stopping her from it? Which then became what is it that I want, and what's stopping me from it. The cool part about this question is that you may not know the answer until you stumble upon it, which is more or less what happened in my original draft for NaNo. It's true to life though: you may not know the answer to that question until you stumble upon it.

As I said before it has been quite a while since another project derived from me fixing another thing. That's how my first novel began, actually: it derived from something else, but it had a different question that I had back in 2015... a question that later on that year lead me into discovering that I'm transgender.

I want to share some other powerful quotes from Joseph Campbell that really hit me as I'm trying to answer that question. None of these would look out of place in @Fremen 's log:

“Life has no meaning. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer.”

“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

Good news for this Watch! I wrote this entire novel in 27 minutes, on a notebook that measures 205 mm by 275 mm, in two pages. Mild clickbait: it is just a skeleton, but the whole story is there, minus the usual chapters of a Chivalric Romance that always go into tangents. I guess I just finished a story? I feel quite confident about this. It turned out to be much better than the idea was in my head, and I just realized the protagonist I had in mind was a decoy. As soon as I wrote, the focus shifted onto someone else.

I'm going to challenge myself to see if I can finish this book much sooner than I think I will.

Also, I did it with a black pen. Forget pencil, we are not deleting ideas right now.

E: End of the Watch. I already wrote one chapter and a half. Not only having a body double is helping me, but realizing that the story is over is helping me to move forward. The skeleton is working more like a roadmap, and now I'm just adding details. Fleming was right on the money when it comes to this.

The plan for tomorrow is cut a few pieces of paper into 5" x 3" index cards to write summaries of each chapter. Just a few for now, to not lose track of where I'm at, and just keep writing without editing. Characters' names are temporary anyway, as well as chapter titles. If I need inspiration, I still have Amadis of Gaul with me. It's moving forward though.

 

[Sólveig]

Not a Watch. I had to stay up. In fact, it was a day of distractions, and attempts to keep writing... but I only wrote for a minute today. 22 words in a minute.

The distraction was... not because the things that happened today in the country. Honestly, the world is forcing me to join the mass hysteria, and I'm dangerously close to do it, but I'm refusing because I accepted that things will suck, no matter what happens. It's quite a relief, but it's the anxieties, the way the press and how news travel around here, how everyone is into the telenovela that is the political world, and how everyone is so passionate about it that every single person is into this... bullsh*t of a story that they have no control of, and then immediately feel powerless when things don't go their way. It has gotten so bad that everyone is just completely stoic when deeply Orwellian stuff happens right before their eyes, or they just watch in horror, but five minutes later, it's either busines as usual or, again, powerless hysteria. That's no way of living! Again, why should I care for two old men who don't even know who I am? It doesn't even matter who sits on that throne, at the end of the day, none of the two are going to change my life! I am the only one who can do it, so I just stopped caring, and accepted the fact that everything sucks. As long as I'm writing, as long as I'm building my life, things will suck less because those things I am in control of.

As for control goes, I guess this is just part of the Road of Trials. Today, after I meditated, I wrote out my weaknesses and threats, or as I put it down, the weak points from my armor, and the dragons that I'm up against. My obstacles are things that I can't kill on my own. The majority of them are impossible for me to just slay. Slaying dragons, however, is not really the point. The point is more about fooling them. As for the Woman as the Temptress goes, well I'll be damned! It showed up today! I was not expecting my ex texting me through Discord after a week. I'm keeping things cool though, and just showed her my progress. How I wrote an entire novel last night in 27 minutes; a novel that is 594 words long, by the way, I counted it. Things are moving forward, even though I am committed to what feels the most absurd, ambitious, and stupidest goal I've traced. I even put it in my meditation journal, because it is a pattern that I've had since I was a teenager. When it comes with partners, why am I always so ambitious and always shoot for the ones that are harder to get? The answer that I think I have is ADHD. As you may know, I love a challenge, and while those over-hundred Snowballs that I got during the Snowfight made me laugh and complain, I did them because I really wanted to do those Jumping Jacks. So yeah, I'm into the challenge. It's like "but Sólveig, you can't get a girl like that!" and I'm like "watch me, brah!"

First one paid off for a year. Second one paid off for six years, and it was better, and it was even more ambitious. Sometimes I forget the things that I do, and when I remember them I realize that people are right when they tell me I'm some sort of superhuman. All because ADHD. I mean, did I do a novel last night in two pages because I wanted to have the story finished? Yes, but I was curious if it was possible to fit an entire novel in two pages, and it turns out it can be done. I don't want to say "give me 60 minutes and I'll have you a best seller" because I'm too far away from that, but I wouldn't be surprised if later on I am pushing books by the hour. Writer I am not, I am a tree mass murderer. If you don't believe me, my journal consists in 18 notebooks and it is going up. Nearly 10 years journaling too, from the moment I found out I was transgender until today.

But yeah, I was distracted today... mostly due to the results of the meditation. It's been emotional, and it is because I care for things to be right. I closed a chapter, I'm using the pain of the closure to write a better story than what I did for NaNo, and I'm considering start NaNo over from scratch because it is no longer about the past, but rather about the future.

Nearly 2K today,, 260 Burpees. At the end of the day, I had a blast, and in spite of the dire circumstances that surround this rhino-shaped country, I had a good day. Now I know how those people who thought of 2020 as the best of year of their lives felt compared to the rest of us who had it bad. The more I meditate, the more I write, the more I feel like I'm going somewhere. Got my index cards ready too, and now it's time to keep writing my novel. Index card summaries are quite amazing. I'm sorry Stephen King, but it's easier to have a summary than read the last two pages.

January 9th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Twists +EC
Count: 1715 - 1711 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Rebooted. On hold until further notice
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 10 Full Burpees
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 9
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 523 words in 27 minutes! (23/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1996 words in 90 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

Watch.

A bit of a wreck today, but I did put words on the last Watch, and I put more throughout the day. A first for the 365 days challenge: a story without any dialogue. I'll have to confess something though: at one point I ran out of ideas, so I gave myself 5 minutes to write 30 ideas in a slip of paper. Ended up with 12, but as I kept rolling a D12 (which now is a D10), some prompts could be recycled, and the roll of today sparked a prompt that is a bit of a sequel to today's story. Certainly the dice are helping with decision fatigue, though one of my rolls had a very difficult prompt to solve.

On the other hand, I walked, but did not do Burpees. There was a powercut too, which was just... ugh. On the flip side, good news! NOTHING HAPPENED! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENED! I WAS RIGHT! Oh man, people's anxieties must be right now like... clown emoji. That's the only way I can describe it. You have no idea how thankful I am for nothing happening, and the status quo remaining the same; it just means that the rules of the game won't be changing anytime soon either. Those who want to keep fighting for a lost cause, be my guest, but this girl right here has better things to do than risking her life over two old men who don't even know who I am. At the end of the day, like I said before, things will get worse before they get better, regardless of who is the one sitting on that stupid throne made of blood and sh*t.

So, what do I got today? A reminder that I'm falling for an old pattern again, I'm feeling scattered, which means a bit of a regroup before I tackle down my goals. Brain has been really getting distracted, chasing the things I shouldn't focus instead of the thing I should focus on. I think it's the novelty of handwriting. I actually want to handwrite some stuff, so I guess it'll be a good idea to take some of the stories for my anthology (perhaps the prompts that promise to be short) out of the digital world and put them into paper instead. Then, there's the fact that I'm having too many ideas, and I'm chasing each one, like... that dumb donkey who died of dehydration, once again. I'm going to put a compass on my BuJo and give myself arguments for writing that book to see if that triggers me into doing it. The prompt is simple: write "I am focused because," and then I close the loop at the end of the day by giving myself evidence that I did what I had to do.

Yep, I learned that from meditating. I also figured out an answer for that question about me chasing the impossible, which then turned into another question that I could just journal for hours: what is an extraordinary life? I hope to not go full Greek on this one, but a part of me wants to go full Greek.

There won't be any writing for this Watch. I... don't think there will be any writing for this weekend? I did start a short story for Valentine's Day that felt interesting, but I couldn't keep going beyond 192 words in 28 minutes. This was because I went out to write, hence the walk, but I was in the middle of a conversation, got severely distracted, especially when the political situation got mentioned, and I just couldn't immerse myself in the story. I did use one of the A5 pieces of paper that I cut for drawing to write it, and now I'm thinking about making an A5 folder to carry those pieces of paper with me in a more portable fashion rather than just chucking them in my bag and have them get damaged by all the movement. I'll see if I can do that during the day. It won't take long.

January 10th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 30 Plank Crunches +EC
Count: 1716 - 1712 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Rebooted. On hold until further notice
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: Unrolled
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 10
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 607 words in 32 minutes! (24/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
1445 words in 82 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

No Watch. I decided to skip it. I felt slightly tired, so I slept.

There was no writing, except lots and lots of journaling. The more I do the Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself meditation, the more questions I'm getting, so I had to spend a few pages journaling, until I finally got all the theory done, and have one answer to the things that I need. Finally, all things cleared up, and now I know which are the trials I must go through the Road of Trials. I'm a bit afraid of it, but at least feels good to have actual clear goals. I need to get the steps and milestones for those goals, but I know what some of them are. Thankfully, there's plenty of ways to make the untangibility of those goals and bring them into tangible steps, so I'll be fine on that regard. However, I don't think I'll do that today. There's also something important that I've been putting off and it is my personal Vision statement. I already know what I want in it because I wrote about it at the tail end of last year, but now things got slimmed down due to life happening.

No writing beyond journaling, and my 365 challenge, to which I did not roll any die because I had the idea since the afternoon, and I also have an idea for today's entry. 250 Burpees checked!

We're rebuilding. We're refocusing, We're improving. I will end the scattering this week by prioritizing the things that I want better so that I have one project to focus on. Also, just cut a bunch of A5 pieces of paper because the A5 size is more portable for me to write. I've already experienced it. I need to get more A5 notebooks. They are a whole lot better to carry around to write everywhere, because that's what I'm doing now: I'm writing anywhere, anytime.

January 11th, 2025
Kickboxing: Day 196

---

Morning Routine:
The Right Side + 10 Decline Push-ups
Sól Salutation - LVL I +EC
20-Seconds Legs
Before Breakfast Burpees
Daily Dare: 40 W-extensions +EC
Count: 1717 - 1713 +EC

---

Night Routine:
Mani Salutation - 1 Set
Five Rites
Virasana + 60 Seconds Meditation
Get to Bed on Time
Daily Gratitude
Counting Victories

---

Training Plan:
Fighter - Throughout the day
Valkyrie - Regular Training
Programs:
Extreme HIIT: Rebooted. On hold until further notice
Bucket List:
Shadebound
High Gear

---

Workouts:
200 Burpees / Death By Burpees - LVL III +EC
Glutes, Quads, Hamstrings & Calves
100/50 Strength
Pole Dance Stretches
DAREdice: 12 Sit-ups | 12 Push-ups
1 minute Uttanasana w/Toe Reach
2-Minute Elbow Plank
Daily Walk
Shuffle Dance! (#1, #2, #3, H.A.T.E.R.)
Belly Dance
Dancing Days: 38

---

Challenges:
Standing Abs: Day 11
Writing the Same Thing Every Day for a Year: 497 words in 23 minutes! (25/30)
Bucket List:
Empty

---

Writing progress:
497 words in 23 minutes!
1500 Get!
Writing Tiers:
500 Words
1000 Words
1500 Words

---

Reading progress:
The 12 Week Year - 17%
Ironsworn - 0/260 Pages

---

Other Victories:

 

[Sólveig]

• Writing: 7 days, 6982 words
• Burpees: 6 days, 890 Burpees
• 1 day of reading

---

Yeah, not so great compared to last week. I'm not discouraged, I just got scattered, like, way too scattered. Plus, when I took the decision of closing my chapter with my ex, I started working on it throughout the week, which ended up in me asking myself all those journaling questions, with both @neilarey and @Damer making a cameo in my journal because they are part of the huge roster of role models that I have.

Being scattered was, well, bad, because those 7K mean nothing because the only thing that I made progress in was... the 365 challenge. However, it made me put all the plot bunnies into a list, and now I can tackle whichever gets my most attention. I still feel overwhelmed in the way I organized it, so I must do another retreat and try again. On the other hand, it helped to give me a bit of focus, which is ironic because I ended up being scattered. This isn't about writing, but the next chapter of my life. When I got out of the Belly of the Whale, I pretty much didn't know where to go next, and now, this week, I think I found a clue as to where to go. It's rather nebulous, but hopefully I'll get this cleared up this week, especially considering that I'm seeing my therapist on Wednesday, and I do want his input. Last year was one beating after the other, and I'm really not the same, especially after the elections. I can't stress this enough, that was the most horrifying experience that I've had in my life.